YOU religious freak, u would rather see me being sacrifice with blood splash throughout my body, then to admit that GOD has treat me like crap!

This is my mom, a stubborn old wrench who hasn't face enough hardship to admit that GOD is not all he crack up to be.

No matter what I tell her, she is too stubborn to admit that GOD had put a curse on me all these years. Social Anxiety just doesn't happen to everyone, and it sure found the perfect timing to bring devastating result years later.

I have quit all connection with my mom, and have told her to go to hell. There is no way from now on I will ever step foot into a church, I rather spit at Jesus foot than kiss it.

Years of being alone, and I am going fucking crazy. Every hopes I get come crashing down on me the next day. I did so many things to be social and make friends like trying out for frats (didn't get in, stupid Asians), various clubs ( most already knew each other from dorm), talking to my floor mates (too selfish), talking to lonely people (shy away), try to enroll in acting class (teacher was a bitch, didn't let me in), try to flirt with one of the dinning hall girls (already had a bf), ask a girl to hang out with me (lame excuse was "too busy"), wrote on my floor mates wall, (never respond back), ask my mom to understand (she didn't want to), floor mates ask for stuff (yet only using me).

So FUCK YOU MOM, and fuck UCSC and its student. Oh and FUCK my sorry life.

What have I don to deserve this? The only thing I ever did was try to be friendly, care for others, treat people with respect, be a good listener, help other in need, etc...

This post was last modified: 10-26-2008 05:07 PM by Chris 2.

I think you should really be asking is "what am i doing wrong?"

There is no god, no higher power that has cursed you. Your life is a result of how YOU have approached it.

I know ive not been on this forum very long, and Im sorry if im blunt, but it seems you are a very angry person who wants to lash out and blame those around you.
Having anxieties and depression is not reason enough to talk to your mother like shit and vent your frustration.
So what if your Asian? So what if your mom loves God?So what if you cant get a gf?
No one deserves to have crappy lives, but some have it worse then others.
Its what you do to change it that counts.
Maybe if you stop trying so hard with girls,stop feeling sorry for yourself and learn to deal with your anger and learn to like who you are, you might actualy stop and think beyond yourself and stop acting like a spoilt child with a temper tantrum.
As i said, im sorry if im being offensive, but as a parent of a teenaged son with emotional and behaviour problems who has told me to fuck off and worse probably more times then i can remember nearly all his life, It gets old and tiring. Fast.
Only you can do somthing about it, not your mom, not any god, not any gf.
Change happens if you want it to.

This post was last modified: 10-26-2008 07:12 PM by Gothmother.

there is not such thing as god in my opinion. >: so I think you can't blame
a figment of people's imagination ^^;

Why do you need your mom to understand? You are a man. Your mom has her own life and not even your mom could understand what its like to live your life. Only you can do that. She has her path in life to take and you have yours.

You have to change things and bitching to your mom about whats wrong well not change them things. The only thing that well achieve is that you well hurt your moms feelings. Shes done her job. She feed and clothed your ass for the first 18 years of your life. Now you have to take care of your self. And maybe in the future your mom as well. Only you know whats best for you.

That was a wee bit two faced of me that I just write as I too have bitched to my mum about stuff in the past. But it don't make it right.

This post was last modified: 10-26-2008 07:25 PM by Bluey.

Maybe your right Bluey, but my mom has her own life yet impose her will on me. I'm 20, and yet she still make me go to church against my own accord. Remembering the past, I could care less if she mad at me or not, but I'm not gonna step into church (the devil graveyard) anymore.

Nobody should be able to make you go anywhere you don't wont to go. I think its up to you to tell your mom in the most polite way possible that you have your own views on things and you chose not to go to Church but respect her choice to go. If she gets mad at you then that's her look out.

You have to be fair to your mom. After all she ye mom and well love you like no other human being ever well. But at the same time you have to understand that in her eyes you are her little boy and not a man. Through you are a man and you have to do whats right for you. Why respecting your mom. Difficult thing to do I know. Sometimes your mom well be hurt by what you choice to do. I choice to get my own place when I was 20 and I know this hurt my mom. But I did that in the best way I could. Still there was no getting around that, that did hurt her.

If you let someone control you they well control you. I left home cos my dad was giving it some my roof my rules and I basely am not a person that can be controlled like that so even though I was scared to death of him I gave him a fuck off pill and got my own roof where I made my own rules up. Wasn't easy for me to do. But I would rather be dead then be controlled in that way. I do love and respect both my mum and dad though. Sometimes in life its necessary to have to do things like this for yourself even though you know it well hurt the ppl you love.

But. And this is a big BUT, It is my believe that you do still have a faith in God. I think maybe your just angry at him. Now I don't have that faith and never have gone to Church regally on my own or with my family. But do understand and even respect ppl that do have that believe.

Do you really not have that faith any longer or is it just that your angry? This has nothing to do with your mom and everything to do with you as a man and a human being.

I know ive not been on this forum very long, and Im sorry if im blunt, but it seems you are a very angry person who wants to lash out and blame those around you.
Having anxieties and depression is not reason enough to talk to your mother like shit and vent your frustration.
So what if your Asian? So what if your mom loves God?So what if you cant get a gf?
No one deserves to have crappy lives, but some have it worse then others.
Its what you do to change it that counts.
Maybe if you stop trying so hard with girls,stop feeling sorry for yourself and learn to deal with your anger and learn to like who you are, you might actualy stop and think beyond yourself and stop acting like a spoilt child with a temper tantrum.
As i said, im sorry if im being offensive, but as a parent of a teenaged son with emotional and behaviour problems who has told me to fuck off and worse probably more times then i can remember nearly all his life, It gets old and tiring. Fast.
Only you can do somthing about it, not your mom, not any god, not any gf.
Change happens if you want it to.

*applauds*

This victim attitude really is not helping. At first I thought you were just in dire need of friendship and some self improvement tips...but every day, there's a new post of the same "Why is god/life/the world doing this to me" attitude.

I hate to sound mean, but I think your anger and loathing and victim attitude might be shining through to other people, and that pushes most people away (and the people it draws to you aren't the sort of friends you want). You need to work on that before anything else.

It's like a job search, dude. If you go in for an interview and they call you and say "sorry, no cigar", are you going to pout in the corner and whine because they should've hired you and you deserve the job? No. If you really want that job, you reflect on your credentials and your interview (and resume, if applicable) and look at it from the employer perspective, and think about how you can make yourself a better candidate for the job.

This post was last modified: 10-27-2008 10:21 AM by Brian.

Chris, maybe the problem is you, not everyone else.