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Naleena
The moon is every woman's friend

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Post: #1

Funnies

I have some funny things my sis sends me. I hope it's ok to put it here. If not please correct me. Anyone else feel free to share yours Smile

Sing like no one's listening, love like you've never been hurt, dance like nobody's watching, and live like its heaven on earth.

The deepest craving of human nature is the need to be appreciated. -William James

Life is not lost by dying; life is lost minute by minute, day by dragging day, in all the thousand small uncaring ways. -Stephen Vincent Benet

I'm a bitch, I'm a tease
I'm a goddess on my knees
When you hurt, when you suffer
I'm your angel undercover
I've been numb, I'm revived
Can't say I'm not alive
You know I wouldn't want it any other way

06-05-2008 09:11 AM

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Naleena
The moon is every woman's friend

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Mental Hospital Phone List

Hello and thank you for calling the State Mental Hospital.

Please select from the following options:

If you are Obsessive Compulsive, press "1" repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press "2" for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press "3", "4", "5" and "6".

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the
line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press "7" and your call will be forwarded to the
Mother Ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you
which number to press.

If you are depressed, it doesn't matter which number you press because
nothing will make you happy anyway.

If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969.

If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep
or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short-term memory loss, press "9". If you have short-term
memory loss, press "9". If you have short-term memory loss, press "9".

If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. Our operators are too busy to
talk to you.

If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down
and cry. You won't be crazy forever.

06-05-2008 09:13 AM

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Incognita
miss

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Post: #3

RE: Funnies

lol...some are funny indeed...
but only some...

~A Better Tomorrow~

This post was last modified: 06-06-2008 01:09 AM by Incognita.

06-05-2008 10:23 AM

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evanescencefan91
Professionally Crazed Fan

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Post: #4

RE: Funnies

ohh that really made me smile

thise are really funny

i though the short memory one was the best

sweet raptured light, it ends here tonight

06-05-2008 10:43 AM

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JustLost
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Post: #5

RE: Mental Hospital Phone List

Naleena Wrote:

Hello and thank you for calling the State Mental Hospital.

Please select from the following options:

That's really funny. I think I have all of those problems...except for the menopausal thing. Toungue

06-06-2008 12:52 AM

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NeverMore
Hibernating....*yawns*

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Post: #6

RE: Funnies

*looks at phone and slams head against all the numbers at the same time*

Toungue

I found those funny thx for that

May the stars carry your sadness away,
May the flowers fill your heart with beauty,
May hope forever wipe away your tears,
And, above all, may silence make you strong.

06-07-2008 07:10 AM

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davechaos
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Post: #7

RE: Funnies

Cool and very funny lol. Thanks.

Sometimes I wonder about my life.

I lead a small life, well valuable but small. And sometimes I wonder. Do I do it because I like it or because I haven't been brave?

So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book when shouldn't it be the other way around?

I don't really want an answer. I just want to send this cosmic question out into the void.

So, goodnight dear void.

06-07-2008 07:23 AM

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Bluey
Fishing in the rivers of life

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Post: #8

RE: Funnies

lol Naleena

OK I have a joke or two that I seem to fined funny for some reason,

Why did the mushroom go to the party? cos he was a fun-guy.

Why did the mushroom leave the party? cos there was not mush-room.

OK I hear you all say not to give up my day job lol But I thought that was funny Toungue

Help me raise my Habamon!

07-10-2008 05:58 PM

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Minus
Freak

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Post: #9

RE: Funnies

08-04-2008 06:36 PM

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