i dont know what else to do, i hate this feeling of loneliness and i at least think i know what to do to solve it but when i try to put it in practice i revert to my old ways and mind state, and nothing changes i dont know what to do... ive tried to solve my problems on my own but im weak, it's too overwhelming for me and i give up. i already gave up on me, but i realized i could interpret my thoughts all i want i still need some sort of feedback to at least realize that im not crazy, or realize i am. also, im sorry i dont mean any disrespect, i think im pretty sad for not having anyone i trust in real life and having to find comfort on the internet, but like i said before i dont know what else or who else to turn to.

i cant help that i have this feeling that i brought this upon myself and, im sorry i dont mean any disrespect, bjarne's quote really fortified this feeling
-- "There are no answers. There are only Choices." (From Solaris)

i dont know how else to describe my feelings. that's partially because i smoke weed to numb the pain. i know i shouldnt and its probably a factor which causes my loneliness, but what else do i have? im trying to at least forget everything i remember or smoke myself till i have so much brain damage that well im retarded, because the more i think of my situation the more i realize how sad i really am for not getting out of this, etc. i really wish someone will reply, please. ive talk to myself so much that i really do think im crazy, else, i guess, i am very much alone.

Well, here's a reply--and my good deed for the day.

Hang in there and don't destroy yourself. Nature will eventually take care of that. The idea is to beat her for as long as possible. Yes, I think it's a game. (And someone better be keeping score.)

Hi there,

I'm pretty much in your boat right now.  I think in hard times in life, few ppl are there for you.  The last reply kinda makes me mad.  SS7 said she's done her "good deed for the day".  I think that's pathetic.  I mean, don't ppl have any compassion, just for the sake of.  That's like saying, oh, i'm gonna bother to reply just so that I can feel good about myself.  Just goes to show how selfish ppl really are.

Anyhow, I think that the only way to get out of your current situation is to make major life changes, ie. what you've been attempting to do, and yes, finding someone to talk about it with, and not just anyone who couldn't give a shit, cause that will just make you more pissed and depressed.  Also, try to do something positive that you really enjoy, or something that your really good at.  A boost in the self confidence really helps.  Sometimes even if it's just playing sports, going to the gym, it lifts ur spirits.  Keeping a journal is a good idea too, just to kinda vent out.  It's a way of doing it when no one is there to listen.

The main thing is that change only comes when that something clicks in ur head and you say to urself that want it and it will happen.  Nobody can help you with that. There are bumps along the way, and that's how keeping positive things in ur life will help you.

Take care, and remember that things usually work out if u stick to ur guns and keep trying from your end of things.  Life is like one big game with urself.  How far can you push, only you can decide that.

guest,

Please don't be mad. And you are right; my openling line does sound haughty. That was not the intent--it was meant to be tongue-in-cheek, but ended up coming out wrong anyway, I suppose.

BTW, I'm a "he"; at least that's what the profile says. So therefore the complete lack of compassion (even for the sake of) and the sordid desire to get my cyber-jollies from beating up on others. It's gross, I know, but it's what I live for! You've caught me! Good job.

brown, opening lines aside, the advice still stands. Don't destroy yourself. I have some experience in that department, and therefore feel qualified to tell you not to do it. Several years of my past life is a black hole that I would love to recover now using a magic lamp, but of course cannot. Don't even think of going there. Your remark about "smoking weed till your brain gets damaged" disturbed me greatly.

Cheers,
ss7.

Oh one more thing, guest.

Since you felt free to judge my level of compassion and colour me selfish based on a single sentence, I feel I have earned the right to make a request of you.

The next time you feel like gauging someone's character on an Internet forum, do find in yourself the common courtesy to address the person directly, and not snarkily in the third person. In case this is too hazy for you, let me illustrate with two hypothetical conversations, only one of which follows correct form.

Wrong way
ss7: Snap out of it John Doe, you are way stronger than the stuff you are smoking. Or something to that effect.

guest (addressing John Doe): Oh that ss7 is so beastly. So selfish and heartless.

ss7: Sod off, you rancid baboon. Save your amateur detective work for those who actually give a flying whosyerfather.


Right way
ss7: Snap out of it John Doe, you are way stronger than the stuff you are smoking. Or something to that effect.

guest (addressing ss7): Oh ss7, you are so beastly. You are so selfish and heartless.

ss7: Sod off, you rancid baboon. Save your amateur detective work for those who actually give a flying whosyerfather.


... See the difference?