I really don't think that there are enough hours in a day. And sleep, too! What kind of extravant expenditure of time that we must put forth in a day just to have enough strength and energy to continue. Worse, too, I find that I have to take at least one nap a day to maintain my level of activity. One supposes that its only 30 minutes, but its still 30 minutes that could have been put to much more effective use. Or something.

JOURNAL:

Morphy's Mate. Solved six chess puzzles. Lost two games, won two, drew one. Using pawns more definitely has helped.

Social

Today was too cold for me to go out. Plus I had too much to do.

Literary
Another last minute save - got to write what I needed and sent it out to my editor. Hooray for last minute saves.

Technical
Studied one of the partitioned chapters. That was not as fun as I thought. Still have the written labs to do.

CONCLUSION:
Life doesn't have enough hours in a day. Like chess, we really have to try to accomplish multiple objectives in an hour if we're to do anything worth a damn.

Regards,
IO

I didn't do very much on Friday. I accomplished a little bit, but mostly decided to slack off and rest. Yeah, I'm horrible. Then again, now I have this wonderful weekend of work to look forward to!

I'm not sure why I haven't been so unproductive today and yesterday. Perhaps its the cold? Maybe I have some genetic impulse to hibernate instead of getting thngs done when the ambient temperature is below 60 degrees or something. Anyway! I tried to break with this pattern somewhat today.

Also, Gravity by Vienna Teng playing. More people need to appreciate the loveliness of a single voice accompanied by piano; simplicity is beautiful, as they say. Plus, it was the song that Lindsay had once assigned to me(well, it was really Momentum, but Gravity is heck of a lot less pretentious in its lyrics).

JOURNAL:

Chess
There's an old Chinese archery parable. It goes something like this - a young man wanted to learn how to aim at a target, so he sought the advice of a master. The master told him: "Focus your eyes on something tiny, until it becomes large." So the young man found a dead fly and hung it on a string in a window - a tiny gnat of a fly, we're led to understanding.

On the first month, the fly remained pretty damn small. On the second month, the fly seemed a little bit larger to his vision. On third month, the fly seemed so massive that its wings could have been wheels, so the young man immediately gripped his bow, loosed a shot, and pinned the insect on the arrowpoint.

Naturally, On the fourth month, he was arrested for cruelty to the dead, ending a brilliant career that he could have had in cruelty to the living.

Ahem!

Point is, I had my first victory against a expert ranked player today, and it wasn't even an accident or blunder. With repetition comes improvement, I suppose, but its still very nice to realize that I've become a better player. I still make stupid mistakes - stupid mistakes that cost me the game, but I'm definitely out of the beginner rank of players. That makes me happy.

Studied Anastacia's Mate(and pretty much won with a version of it), and solved six chess puzzles.

Social

Too damn cold. Shoo.

Literary
Went and edited a script for a friend - I've also begun to catch up on my missing assignments. My editor is going to send me another story to review, so I'm going to try to get it done before the weekend is over.


Technical
At this moment, I haven't done any studying. I would credit to the weekend, but I think I'll catch up for my lack over Friday now by working on two chapters. I can't let myself fall any further behind, but I can forsake a night of sleep.

CONCLUSION:

Sleep is for the weak, you know?

Regards,
IO

Usually there's some interesting preface here, but mostly I'll just comment that I find most movies to be excruitiatingly boring. Its not just that the action is repetitive, but in the search for the cheap adrenaline thrill, moviemakers seem to have forgotten how to give a real adrenaline thrill. Take, for example, Resident Evil: Apoclypse, which was just showing on Sci-Fi a few minutes ago. The original zombie movies worked very well because there was a sense of realism beyond the initial weirdness. Ordinary people behaved in realistic ways, responding to extraordinary conditions. Extraordinary people in extraordinary conditions with weird reactions just causes a lack of connection with the audience.

JOURNAL:

Chess

I think I've learned all the mates. However, I solved six more chess puzzles.

Social

I noticed today that the really cute cashiergirl at the place where I eat, the one for whom I almost got into a fight because some kids were hassling her, has cut scars on her wrists. I thought about asking her about it, but didn't. I guess I chickened out? Its kinda a sensitive subject, and there probably wasn't much that I could have done.

Literary
Read HG Wells's Time Machine. I miss the days when writers actually used words like "hoarfrost."

Technical
Finished a written lab.

CONCLUSION:

Its a good thing that anything worthwhile takes time. It makes life into more of a game - where you really have to plan out everything.

Regards,
IO

Nothing to say today.

JOURNAL:

Chess

Eeeeeehhh...I lost eight games in a row, then drew one, and won one. Maybe I'm getting burnout.


Social

I saved a puppy!

Literary
Listened to my muse go on and on about Australia. She does love her nation - and its cute. I come to realize, though, that as a Texan, we're probably among the most violent people in the world. Rock.

Technical
Read a chapter.

CONCLUSION:

Saving puppies gives you courage and makes you feel wonderful. More people should do so.

Regards,
IO

dear journal,
what do I do to do i do i don't ...w/e
i'm the laziest person in the mf world, I'm thirsty but unfortunately I dont wonna get out of the bed, its way to early, its like 2:35 pm or someth. Can u please go get me someth. to drink?
thanks, ur the best.

Dear Journal,

I'm sorry, I wasn't paying attention; I was busy checking out that absolutely gorgeous- Oh heavens! Imagine my embarrassment as I realize it's just a highly reflective pool of water I've been gazing into. I could kill for a Snicker's brand caramel confection, incidentally. Be a lamb, someone, and fetch me one. I'll be right here.

Love,
IO

Dear Journal,

Being bitten by the laziness bug is not good.

Regards,
IO

Dear Journal,

I haven't updated you for awhile, and for more or less good reason - I haven't really accomplished that much. I mostly wasted the last week or so playing Starchamber after downloading it. Mind you that it was a very entertaining way to spend the time and I entirely promote the concept of a novella cum strategy game to more people. Now if only they were faster to get through...

I had a significant moment of weakness today. I wondered about the lack of love in my life, and felt some pang of self-pity that I cannot seem to be loved by anyone. I've never been able to desire anyone and have that desire returned. In short, I've never truly felt wanted by anyone.

A lot of me wanted to cry, but then I asked myself what was the use of crying? After the tears are gone, I'll still be alone and it'll just be a waste of energy. So I was strong and still find myself learning to accept that, I am not like the others. Perhaps I'll never be loved. Perhaps my choices ensure that I live this life alone.

This I'll have to accept. Maturity, it would seem, involves learning how to die gracefully. As I've let my romantic dreams die gradually in the series of failures, rejections, and shattered hopes, I think I've become a more mature person. Because, really, such is life. I may not like it, but reality doesn't need my approval.

Chess

Didn't practice today. Was too busy studying.

Social

Besides the moment of weakness mentioned above, I didn't feel any fear or intimidation from anyone. A small bit of envy, perhaps, but I am me and they are they. They have their fortunes, and one can only hope that they will come to realize it. My flaws are my own, and not their fault.

Literary
Starchamber's novella was pretty damn neat.

Technical
Coffee is my ally. After three cups of caffiene, I didn't want to do anything but study and get it over with. I accomplished more today than I've had in a week. Goal definitely accomplished.

CONCLUSION:

Hope is the delusion of mankind.

Regards,
IO

Dear Journal,

I wish that everything had a little bit more permnance. At least, if the good things in life did.

Chess

Solved three puzzles today, didn't get a chance to practice it. I feel that I'm mentally better conditioned for chess now, though I'm not sure if I can yet apply it so well.

Social

Looks like I enjoyed a little bit too much caffiene yesterday. I was sick for much of today, so beyond work, I took some long naps instead. I do feel much better about life, though.

Literary
Need to finish up two scripts for my editor, planning for a bit more writing this weekend.

Technical
More studying done today, including that horrific subnetting chapter.

CONCLUSION:

Pain is the constant of mankind.

Regards,
IO
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