I don't think that a husband or wife can meet 100 percent of our needs. I think that my husband is my life partner, and my friends provide other emotional comforts.

Why are we lonely? is b/c we don't fit it, because we miss someone, or because we wish we had that special some1....or is it because we do fit it but we just can't handle the hypocracy and fakeness of this world.....i mean, sometimes i find myself searching for a purpose to life... i mean its gr8 and everything but ok we go to school, we have jobs, get married, have kids, we get old then children leave their parents, then eventually we die...then what..thats it right????

well be4 i continue to make you want to die already, i know the answer to my loneliness... i just don't look 4 it... the answer to all my problems has ALWAYS been God... and whether you believe in him or not... it doesn't matter because he exist.... and if you don't want to believe in him thats ok, cuz all iknow is that HE is the only1 that can help us... the ppl in this world suck...they really do... but 1 person Jesus was able to make that sacrifice to die 4 our sins so that 1 day we could do his will... all i know is that personally i am miserable and unhappy because i have separated myself quite a little spiritually, and that will happen, but you have to fight to remain having a close relationship w/ God....and if you don't agree w/ me please don't bother saying negative things about my opinion, b/c i KNOW that what i believe in is true and no man can change my mind.... GOD is the aNSWEr...everything that i have seen has to me to believe in God for all that I have not....thank you for reading this...find a church and do what your heart tells you to do after you attend 1 service... it changed my life and I know he can help you...i mean, just writing this has helped me realize that just talking about him... has made the loneliness go away...God Bless You

If it is religion and friendships you are seeking I know that the Mormon church embraces its members and they all become close friends.  Many have experienced a warm fuzzy feeling when visiting the Mormon church.  I am thinking about looking in to it.

Lol i love the enthuseasum (*and yes i relize i cant spell*) but that is an old pic...but again flattering whomever posted my pic XD

Your a sweetheart, but I guess we have a difference of opinion, my ex took care of all my emotinal comforts, if it had been just me and her stuck on an isolated island, I would have been in hevean, she complited me in every way, I had friends but they werent neccasary, your saying if it was just you and your husband stuck in the same situation on a deserted island until you died with noone else around you wouldn't be happy beacuse you need other friends to help meet your needs. If you truly love someone with all your heart then I don't think you need anything/anyone else, at least in my experience, sure it was fun to hang with the guys, but if one day I didn't any friends anymore it wouldnt have phased me, my ex took care of all my needs emotionaly,sexualy, shoulder to cry on etc...guess I'm lucky again I am easy to please...I'm not trying to say anything bad, I guess I truly DON"T understand, and I'm trying to...again your a sweetheart and you help people so much, I guess it just a diference in personality's.

Hey Kaz, There is this corny book called "Men are just Desserts." What that means is that men are not necessarily a woman's everything. They should be a big part of our lives, but we women should not rely on men for all of our emotional needs. To me, that is codependency and it's not healthy. As in the case where you loved your girl so much, and when you guys broke up, it was so incredibly devastating to you! What I mean is just that if we rely more on friends and family as well as our partners, then we can be stronger...that's my view. I would LOVE to have a partner who completes me in every way, but I personally don't think it's realistic.

Hmm maybe it's different for a woman, you need lady friends etc...that makes sense, the thing with my ex and me was we both had traits of the opposite sex, guess that could be another reason too...thanks for explaning hun! Yes I was devasted when we split alot of that was that I realized how stupid I had been and all the mistakes I had made, taking her for granted, that is why I was so upset, if it "just didn't work out" I wouldn't have been as upset, but knowing I messed up such a good thing, I was really angry at myself.

I understand how you feel. I want a close friend who can understand me. I want someone to be there for me whenever I'm sad or lonely, or I have something that is troubling me. I want someone who I can talk to about anything. I want someone who I can trust completely. I have some friends, but they are not very close. It seems like they hate me at times, but I think its only that me acting depressed around them annoys them. I usually try to act all happy and hyper around my friends, but I know I'd never be able to tell them how I truly feel. They wouldn't care.

Not all women are the same. Some of us suscribe to the feminist theory of moving past men or somehow being superior to men and then some of us really still do expect to fulfill an entire union where our male is more than enough for us. This takes a lot of humility though and it's not something that's easy for a woman to accomplish because of the high level of brainwashing against males that we're currently being exposed to in the culture all around us.

Definitely if I was alone with my man on a desert island and we were deserted there for the rest of our lives there's no question in my mind that he would be enough for me. I think my concentration would be more on making sure I was enough for him.

The concept though of looking for a man who somehow completes me is bogus though. I'm already complete. If a relationship is to work each person should be asking themselves what _they_ can bring or give to their partner. Not how they can be completed by them or what they can get from them.

Hi Almond,

I'm afraid you sound suspiciously like a male. :-)

However, you do have a good point. I considered myself a feminist until very recently. I think I decided that as a way of opposing what my mother was---a weak woman who stayed with a husband who beat her and treated her like crap for 30 years.

I became the opposite--a woman who is mean to men, at times, a real ball-buster. I was so angry about how abusive my father was, I became quite like him. I've made so many men cry. I feel sorry and bad for what I've done.

Now that I am a parent, I have to temper the anger I have toward men. I don't hate all men. I love my husband. I do dominate him, though. It's not really my 'fault.' His mother is a very bossy woman who wears the pants in her family. His father is very passive and quiet. So, therefore, he probably learned this is healthy and normal.

However, I know that men do not like to be emasculated. I need to work on treating my husband with love and respect so that he knows he is the man in the home. I am the woman. Yet, we share responsibilities.