| i just want a friend...a close friend that cares |
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Mystical_Knight
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| RE: i just want a friend...a close friend that cares
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| 06-23-2007 03:23 AM | |
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Almond
Unregistered
MyMood: None
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| RE: i just want a friend...a close friend that cares
I'll accept your statement about me being a male as a clear indication of something I said hitting a nerve with you. I'm really sorry that it did. That's too bad. Please also know that these words are said with nothing but kindness in my heart.
See I don't know how you can call your mother weak. It really isn't easy to be beaten and treated like cr-- for 30 years. It takes a lot of strength to live in a hellish situation. I know this is _your_ mom and not mine of course but try to consider that for a little while. It might help you a lot.
Maybe I'm wrong but it seems pretty obvious to me that you're trying to achieve something in terms of personal growth. It also seems to me like you're maybe having some type of internal warfare or struggle. I don't know and again I mean nothing but kindness here.
I used to be a feminist. Not even just a baseline feminist. I'm talking ultrafeminist here. I know the mindset. I know what goes with it all but I also know if a woman wants to move passed that she can. It's not easy but it's not impossible either. It takes a lot of soul searching and humility. It takes letting go of that defensive arrogance that's handed to us somewhere in our growing up.
How much I realize now the amount of power I gave up trying to be something I wasn't created to be. We are a wonderful brilliant gift to man. We can either choose to fulfill this gift or destroy ourselves fighting against it.
Remember everything I said in love sister. I wish you the best.
Hi Almond,
I'm afraid you sound suspiciously like a male. :-)
However, you do have a good point. I considered myself a feminist until very recently. I think I decided that as a way of opposing what my mother was---a weak woman who stayed with a husband who beat her and treated her like crap for 30 years.
I became the opposite--a woman who is mean to men, at times, a real ball-buster. I was so angry about how abusive my father was, I became quite like him. I've made so many men cry. I feel sorry and bad for what I've done.
Now that I am a parent, I have to temper the anger I have toward men. I don't hate all men. I love my husband. I do dominate him, though. It's not really my 'fault.' His mother is a very bossy woman who wears the pants in her family. His father is very passive and quiet. So, therefore, he probably learned this is healthy and normal.
However, I know that men do not like to be emasculated. I need to work on treating my husband with love and respect so that he knows he is the man in the home. I am the woman. Yet, we share responsibilities. |
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| 06-23-2007 04:34 PM | |
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