| New girl. Don't bite =p |
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ClosetGeek
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[View Inventory] | RE: New girl. Don't bite =p
Hi Panda,
I suffered from social anxiety when I was around your age. I could not talk in public, I felt like something was blocking my vocal chords. I knew the right answer when a teacher asked me something in class but it was so hard for me raise my finger or my arm and signal her that I knew the right answer. I hated breaks between classes cause everyone would socialize and I would go hide in the bathroom or sit in the library. I was extremely shy. I had a crush on a guy who was the best actor in our school's drama club. He was not aware of my existence. All the girls were pretty and beautiful, and I was the female nerd with braces, glasses and funny outfits.
One day I had enough. I decided to take drama classes for two reasons.
1) I thought I could improve my posture, my tone of voice and the way I presented myself
2) The guy I had a crush on was teaching that class. lol.
So in the end, I improved in all of those fields, met a lot of fun people to hang out with, and you know what? After that the guy I had a crush on did not seem so important to me anymore. Cause I met another guy who was more handsome than him and that guy even took me to the prom.
So my advice, take some classes, maybe painting, drawing or pottery classes. Or maybe even some drama classes. 
p.s. just wanted to add that a friend of mine who is a doctor told me that such classes, painting, drawing or pottery classes and the like, helps one to relax and helps remove psychosomatic symptoms which come around from being depressed. This post was last modified: 06-28-2008 11:29 PM by ClosetGeek. |
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| 06-28-2008 11:07 PM | |
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Panda
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[View Inventory] | RE: New girl. Don't bite =p
Thanks very much freakin_amazin, evanscencefan91, davechaos, bluey, jeremi, scotsgirl and closetgeek! 
"I can appreciate how you feel in so many ways. It mirrors very much my day...I work a lot of hours and come back to a very large house with only myself and three cats in it...it can be the loneliest of times...and the weekends are by far and away the worst. I am also from the UK. It seems to me that often we can be seen to have so many people around us yet there really isn't anyone 'around' us."
That's true, I feel like a ghost most of the time, even in a large group of people at college. I just go in unnoticed, get what i need done then vanish off home and into my room again, every single day.
"That would have hurt me if my dad would had said that to me as well. Well hes only saying it cos he cars but you don't wont your dad thinking that you have no friends or because you don't wont any. My Nana made me feel bad last week. She was all like why don't you get out moor and go on holiday. Am like I have no one to go on holiday with nan. She keeps saying I keep asking you to come with me. But you know My Nana is like 80 next year. I go see her ever week for a few hours but am not really wanting to go on holiday with her. So she thinks its my own fault I don't have a holiday. She basically with out realising it coled me a loner. most of my old mates have wife's and girlfriends and no time for me anymore. I do have houses around me tho as I live on an estate. So in the summer moths like where in now I can hear ppl out side talking and kids playing and am stuck in thinking that I would like to be able to go camping and all the things that ppl do. I do have a bike I go on but again its always on my own."
Yeah I think knowing i'm a complete loner is one thing but having someone close to me tell me that, it just really hurt me. That situation with your nan reminds me of my family, they say these things out of concern but it's frustrating and upsetting to me to be told what I already know when i'm trying my hardest to not be that way anymore
"I suffered from social anxiety when I was around your age. I could not talk in public, I felt like something was blocking my vocal chords. I knew the right answer when a teacher asked me something in class but it was so hard for me raise my finger or my arm and signal her that I knew the right answer. I hated breaks between classes cause everyone would socialize and I would go hide in the bathroom or sit in the library. I was extremely shy. I had a crush on a guy who was the best actor in our school's drama club. He was not aware of my existence. All the girls were pretty and beautiful, and I was the female nerd with braces, glasses and funny outfits.
One day I had enough. I decided to take drama classes for two reasons.
1) I thought I could improve my posture, my tone of voice and the way I presented myself
2) The guy I had a crush on was teaching that class. lol.
So in the end, I improved in all of those fields, met a lot of fun people to hang out with, and you know what? After that the guy I had a crush on did not seem so important to me anymore. Cause I met another guy who was more handsome than him and that guy even took me to the prom.
So my advice, take some classes, maybe painting, drawing or pottery classes. Or maybe even some drama classes. Wink
p.s. just wanted to add that a friend of mine who is a doctor told me that such classes, painting, drawing or pottery classes and the like, helps one to relax and helps remove psychosomatic symptoms which come around from being depressed."
That's really good advice and you're exactly right, I noticed a big difference in my anxiety levels after i started college and being around people there, regardless if they notice i'm even there or not. Before it I was a mess, i'd get shaky even going to shops, I'd never be able to relax in public places and I'd have panic attacks in small rooms.
These days I've grown more relaxed in these places, i'm still anxious but I can sit in the class and just listen to the lecturer and everyone else's opinions, i don't give my own but at least I'm comfortable to stay there without panic attacks. I've also learned to shrug things off a bit easier, even when things happen or i hear someone talking about me, i find it a bit easier to at least try to let it go than i did before.
Thanks again everyone for the welcomes!
This post was last modified: 06-29-2008 12:23 AM by Panda. |
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| 06-29-2008 12:22 AM | |
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Incognita
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| 06-29-2008 02:08 AM | |
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Jeremi
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| RE: New girl. Don't bite =p
You people who have a picture of yourself as an avatar are awesome! ^^
I have to get a decent picture of myself so I can change mine
Still it's hard to just get by. It seems so meaningless to try
When all I want to do is cry. Who would ever know I felt so sad?
Even though I get so high, I know that I will never fly
And when I fall out of the sky, who'll be standing by? |
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| 06-29-2008 04:11 AM | |
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Rawr!
God's gift to women
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| RE: New girl. Don't bite =p
Hello Panda, glad you don't bite!
Me too. The last thing I need in my life right now is rabes.
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| 06-29-2008 05:33 AM | |
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kelthuzad
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| RE: New girl. Don't bite =p
Hi Panda!
I am Kel'thuzad, servant of the lich king, and commander of the scurge. I am glad to make your acquaintance.
on a side note, thats a very purdy picture and i'd never dare put mine on there for the entire world to see my ugly mug, so you should be proud of your courage  |
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| 06-29-2008 06:35 AM | |
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Infexis
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[View Inventory] | RE: New girl. Don't bite =p
@Kel'Thuzad....... Hurray for Blizzard! Also note the obsession with dots O.o
Welcome Miss Panda ........
Even though I am only thireteen your life reminds of mine. Well.... Welcome anyway
Am home nao |
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| 06-29-2008 07:08 AM | |
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Chris 2
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[View Inventory] | RE: New girl. Don't bite =p
Hi Panda! I am Kel'thuzad, servant of the lich king, and commander of the scurge. I am glad to make your acquaintance. on a side note, thats a very purdy picture and i'd never dare put mine on there for the entire world to see my ugly mug, so you should be proud of your courage
Hmm the dark side it is eh? Well I used to be Sir Uther Lightbringer and a lvl 43 Paladin Na jk lol
Hi panda, I wrote you a pm, hope you read it and respond back to me.
Chris
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| 07-24-2008 03:30 PM | |
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eXs and Ohs
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[View Inventory] | RE: New girl. Don't bite =p
hello panda... or should i say ello panda! 
I'm new here and i thought I'd just say hi.
I'm no one to be giving advice, but i guess all I'd like to say is take a risk and go out there and meet people. I know it must be scary, but its okay to take a risk sometimes... you don't have anything to lose, but you have everything to gain. |
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| 07-26-2008 03:29 PM | |
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alonelyshyboy
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[View Inventory] | RE: New girl. Don't bite =p
I'm new. I'm 20, female and I live in the middle of nowhere in the UK.
I suffered from social anxiety for three years and at my worst I couldn't go outside the door without an overwhelming sense of panic. This left me completely alone, I ended up being home schooled and never saw any of my friends again.
I'm now *very* lonely, I live in a large house surrounded by hardly anything but woods and fields with my parents, but my living space is sort of separated from theirs so when I come in or go out, I hardly see them anyway.
To this day I don't have a single friend. I'm 20 and I've never had a boyfriend, never even held a guy's hand. I've probably got the life experience of a 12 year old. I'm so painfully shy that it's hard to talk to girls, but almost impossible to talk to guys.
I go to college, where i spend most of the time alone, or with people who don't give a toss about me then talk about me when my back's turned, after college I wander around town alone until the bus is due. I hate that part, especially in winter when it gets dark early.
When I come home I walk in and straight up to my room and onto the computer all night, and that's it for me. Every single day. I'm like a zombie, i'm not living, I'm just stalling, waiting and hoping something will change.
And it's not like I haven't tried. I've tried so hard with people in college, it's hard for me as it is being a shy and boring person, but I kept trying to talk with them, trying to involve myself but they only wanted to know me in class when they needed help with something, that was it.
The worst part is, once you're alone, it becomes so difficult to get out of it. The harder I try, the more frustrated I get. I sometimes even get all dressed and made up for no reason whatsoever and go out by myself into town, and then everywhere i go, I see people in the street in groups of friends and I just wonder why it's all so easy for them, and do they even know how lucky they are?
I had my father say to me recently, "why don't yo have any friends? why don't you go out with any people your age?"
It makes me so frustrated to listen to that, it's as if he thinks I like being this way, or as if I can go out now and pluck some random people off the street to call my "friends".
Anyway, I'm mumbling on, hello anyway!
Hi there! I was exactly like you back when I was 20. It's tough, and hope that you can just hang in there. You are a pretty girl, so I'm sure you've had to fend off unwanted male attention at times!
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| 07-27-2008 12:03 AM | |
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