i just cut myself. the pain is the pleasure. how many of you have experienced it?

yeah ok, I hate to talk about it.
it makes me feel dirty. disgusting.
but sure, I have in the past cut.
personally, fire feels better.

feels really great when you are really depressed to the point of crying.

I did it when I was younger, and I regret it.

Nothing wrong with a bit of masochism, but by that logic hedonism would be global suffering.

This post was last modified: 08-07-2008 12:43 AM by Unacceptance.

not as bad as when it gets infected and then your arm has to be amputated

We live past the civil war era...

that doesnt mean infections dont happen -_- so come out of your little nothing bad could happen if i cut myself with a razor blade, box of lies

Can't never harm myself!! My pain are usally internal and psychological I don't think I enjoy physical pain.. Can't stand blood at all! have never cut myself (Intentionally) and will never do it.

However, that doesn't mean that you necessarily get your arm amputated at the first sign of bacteria.

I never understood this. I've been down to the depths many times in my life but only adding physical pain to my already huge pile of emotional and pyschological sufferings seemed unnecessary. But hey, I'm a masochist too, just not a wastful one so "water water everywhere, everybody drink! Meaning that sometimes when I'm really feeling chokingly depressed I try and find perverse enjoyment in it. It's not as crazy as it sounds; for instance have you ever cried so hard that you began to really get into it? Now I think about depressive spells as being a journey into the depths of my own psychi where I find new insights on life. I've always found extreme states of mind to be mezmarizing. Like, when I used to take acid, the only really cool shit I ever "saw" was when I closed my eyes: it was like holding my eye up to a kaleidoscope and it really impressed me that my mind could produce such wild shit all on its own. So, now I try and view my misery and sadness (when I'm able to, because, as you well know, those are some overwhelming feelings) as a window into my deepest self. Point being, don't divert yourself from your existential pain with cheap physical pain, but maybe try to plunge into the darkness head on sometime and you may well get the script for an Oscar winning movie out of it! (all the best authors have had issues with depression)