Im 20 and never had a girlfriend in my life. Is this bad?

Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum

Help Support Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.
L

Lonely Boy from OZ

Guest
Well... I didn't want to be into the whole feeling sorry for myself thing again, but maybe I need to express this.

I am 20 yrs old and I have never had a girlfriend. Most women on this planet seem to dislike me :(. I have experienced cruelty from women since grade school and it still happens occasionally... mostly in comes in rude remarks or basic body language.

I'm a shy person, which doesn't help and I have no luck. All my friends, two of which i believe are as shy as I, have had unbelievable luck.. women seemed to come to them. Besides there just doesn't seem to be anybody who is for me out there.
 
You don't have to worry about your age. You have all the time in the world to find a girlfriend. 20 is nothing. And how many people under 20 do you think can say that they've been in a SERIOUS relationship?
 
I've known people who didn't have their first girlfriend until their late 20's. Ask yourself this-would you rather have a girlfriend later on who will treat you right and who you might really work out, or would you rather rush and end up with someone who isn't for you? Sometimes good things DO come to those who wait.
 
Lost_N_Alone said:
I've known people who didn't have their first girlfriend until their late 20's. Ask yourself this-would you rather have a girlfriend later on who will treat you right and who you might really work out, or would you rather rush and end up with someone who isn't for you? Sometimes good things DO come to those who wait.



so true! :)
 
Jeremi said:
You don't have to worry about your age. You have all the time in the world to find a girlfriend. 20 is nothing. And how many people under 20 do you think can say that they've been in a SERIOUS relationship?

Lonely-

A lot of people here are trying to rationalize and say that it's an ok thing, but I agree with you that it SUCKS not ever having a gf and being 20 years old, I'm not going to deny that. The truth is that most people have had relationships before they were 20, and guys like us are the minority. There's no use putting bullshit in our head over that, we just have to accept it as a fact. Instead of waiting, I suggest becoming friends with females first, because whenever I have gone on dates, it was usually through a friend. I'm way to shy to approach a girl cold, especially if she's hot. Next, try to find a girl who is not so attractive and get her to like you. Yes this might be mean, but who knows you might end up liking her. You need to have the confidence booster that hey someone actually does like me. When you know someone likes you it does wonders for your ego. Try to get out more, and just don't be desperate. Find an interest, whether it be music, book clubs, hiking, whatever that forces you to hang out with people your age. You want to meet someone who is down to earth, not a high maintenance chick who is all about herself. Try to think about everything OTHER than having a gf. Just think about being more social. It's tough, but I know you can do it buddy. When you think that there's a connection though, make sure that you capitalize on it. Girls don't like wussy guys. Even if you don't have experience, you must act like you do and prove to them why they should choose you over the next guy. Make sure you wear the pants and don't let any girl step over you.
 
OZ said:
Im 20 and never had a girlfriend in my life. Is this bad?
i wish i could say these words again. & they b true

lonelyloser said:
The truth is that most people have had relationships before they were 20
not from what ive seen during my life. guess this is where relative truth comes up
 
To be honest, your only one year older than me, and I never had a girlfriend either.

I can't even talk to a single girl...:(
 
chris 2, ur just weird LOL.

im 18, no gf, but talking to someone, but...if we do go out...i wonder wat she will think that i dont have friends??
 
I'm 21 and never had a boyf :( I'd love to meet someone special but I don't really go anywhere to meet new people so not sure how it's going to happen. I'm kind of scared now that if I do ever meet someone.. and this is a very big IF, I'm worried I'll scare them off because I've no relationship experience etc. Also, I'm not exactly a super-confident kind of girl which I guess most guys don't like :(. Whenever I see cute couples holding hands and kissing and stuff, I always get so "ahhhhhhhhhhh, I want that" :( Guess I'll just keep on dreaming.
 
tennisgirl said:
I'm 21 and never had a boyf :( I'd love to meet someone special but I don't really go anywhere to meet new people so not sure how it's going to happen. I'm kind of scared now that if I do ever meet someone.. and this is a very big IF, I'm worried I'll scare them off because I've no relationship experience etc. Also, I'm not exactly a super-confident kind of girl which I guess most guys don't like :(. Whenever I see cute couples holding hands and kissing and stuff, I always get so "ahhhhhhhhhhh, I want that" :( Guess I'll just keep on dreaming.

Hey tennisgirl
I dont even believe confident girls exist anymore. I mean I believe that i can see girls doing the same things I do which is hide their lack of confidence. But I have seen hot girls be all down on themselve for appearence reasons. Hot girls thinking their ugly/fat/blah blah blah list goes on. Smart girls freaking out over B pluses... My point is everyone has confidence issues. Its just either how much better we each person is at hiding it or if something is going particularly good moment in their life.

and im another person who has never had a gf weee!
 
I really wish I had someone to care about. Receiving affection and being thought about is great and all, but what I really miss is being there for someone. It feels so good to make a diff. in someone else's life and for them to need you/rely on you. I just like taking care of a girl and protecting her.
 
Well, here's another 20 yo that hasn't had any kind of relation, hehe, as you can see we're legion!!

I probably can subscribe what you say, and I probably feel the same than tennisgirl about our inexperience forbidding us to find someone, but every time that some girl got interested in me I had a really bad time, mainly because they just wanted me for a short term relationship, and when they started knowing me more and that they had to "work" a bit, they quickly ran away...

So, I know it's hard to say and impossible to follow, but just try not to think about it too much. And when you see a couple in the street... just turn your head. Most of the times, the best solution is the easier one.
 
Vitalis said:
Well, here's another 20 yo that hasn't had any kind of relation, hehe, as you can see we're legion!!

I probably can subscribe what you say, and I probably feel the same than tennisgirl about our inexperience forbidding us to find someone, but every time that some girl got interested in me I had a really bad time, mainly because they just wanted me for a short term relationship, and when they started knowing me more and that they had to "work" a bit, they quickly ran away...

So, I know it's hard to say and impossible to follow, but just try not to think about it too much. And when you see a couple in the street... just turn your head. Most of the times, the best solution is the easier one.

I agree that our "inexperience forbids us to find someone", it seems that everyone has plenty of experience so they not only know what to expect, but what to do in a relationship. I came close to being in a relationship and part of the reason why it didn't work was because I was clueless about what to do. I think I think too much, and your right maybe we shouldn't think about it too much. It's actually gotten to the point where instead of turning my head, I change the direction I'm walking to avoid couples, depending on my mood. So here's to another 19 yr old never had a gf, cheers:(
 
Cheers mate, don't worry, I'm sure we are gonna find the best gf possible, all those girls were not obviously for us since they were totally pointless and just-for-fun, so although it had work, we'd ended up in a few. Good luck!
 
Lol....well people....fret not...i mean for most people out there.... I am 22 years old...not a single gf nor did girl approach me .....lol.....i know it might be dissapointing sometimes but somethings r better to wait.
 
I did have a GF @ 17 for 9 months & then again @ 18 for another 9 months then I had to go into hospital for major surgery and I have never had a GF sens are a job and am now 33 next month. Oh I did have a 3 month fling about two years ago but that was never going to work out as she always had difficulty in not dating other lads, So basically I have been alone all my adult life. Nearly 15 years. And its @ this time of the year when it really dose suck like donkey dick :(

Plies GOD if you are really there this is the time for miracles ,,, Give me one cos I truly do deserve it.... ps a nice one not one of them messed up honeysuckle ones that you dis out.

Every one can dream I Guss,, My dream is I meat a girl and fall in love and we have the best love there ever was. And she stays faithfull :) cos its a problem it seams in to days world. Its like am the only one I know sometimes that has any morals at all.
 

Latest posts

Back
Top