I feel so useless

[Lee]

I feel so useless, I liked this guy for so long then did the most stupid thing I have ever done in my life! He told me it was fun and then lef, three months later I find out I am pregnent and now I have a beautifule baby boy that is five months old, what did I do wrong? Is there a reason that he left or was it just me?

I mean how many people have this happen to them? How do they get over it?

[AJR]

Any man worth his salt would have done the right thing and helped you with the life you both created. That man is scum and I am ashamed that he is a member of my gender. There is no excuse for what he did and you cannot blame yourself. It is a small consolation I know but know that any real man would have stepped up and I am sorry he did not do that for you and the child.

[Lee]

I just feel its mu fault some how, I mean maybe if I was more... I dont know something els it might have worked

[Lonely in BC]

Your not useless Lee, you're a Mother.

You have a little guy depending on you to be his world right now- beating up on yourself isn't doing either of you a world of good. Everything is about him so make it your priority to be be the best Mom you can be. Better yet, give him a reason to be proud of you years in the future when he looks back and realizes that your love for him brought out the best in you.

Hopefully you've made an attempt to pursue child support. If not, get on it. Pride isn't going to pay your bills or put food in babies mouth.

The relationship with your former partner is gone. Don't agonize over it, better to find out now than years in the future when he's a deadbeat not taking care of his family. Hopefully you'll be more demanding of quality in the future when you find someone you'd like to be with again. Don't rush into anything else- put the little guy first.

Don't give into despair Lee- you need your strength and to be upbeat. I know nothing of your education, possible career, financial situation, or background. Regardless of how good or not good it is you have to remain upbeat for yourself and baby.

I have met many single Moms during my time on the earth. I respected the ones who made sure that baby was taken care of first, I never respected the ones who had to make everything about them and baby got whatever was left over.

I sincerely wish you and young mister luck- its a real privilege you've been given caring for him. I speak from the heart- my 9 year old daughter is the absolute center of my world, nothing else has been more important to me than her well being.

[Lee]

Thanks, that makes me feel good. I do love my son and I try very hard to put him first in everything I do, he is my world and now that I have him I'm not sure what I would do with out him.

[Ak5]

First of all welcome,

And what a shithead that guy is! I feel for ya, must be very hard to be a single mom. You need to focus on your son and yourself, nothing else matters.

It's a hard road for you i'm sure, but you can surpass it!

[CellarDoor]

Lee, you have to stay strong for the little guy! When I grew up, my mom was single.... Her strength made me feel strong, and it faded just as fast when she passed away... please don't lose hope! I love you!

[Lee]

(01-24-2012 05:13 PM)CellarDoor Wrote:  Lee, you have to stay strong for the little guy! When I grew up, my mom was single.... Her strength made me feel strong, and it faded just as fast when she passed away... please don't lose hope! I love you!

thank you so much, I am glad I found this place it has made me feel so much better and a little bit happier. thank you guys for that

[Among the Sleep]

Please dont EVER blame it on yourself. It tells you everything you need to know about what kind of person this kid is that he left you alone with such a huge responsibility. With a person whos willing to do that type of thing, theres no way it could work, ever. Youre a sweet girl you dont deserve to be lonely, you can message any time you need or want to get some shit off your chest.

[DeadSun]

you did tell him you got pregnant/had his child right?