How do you feel when people get together ?

[putter65]

I've noticed one of work colleagues has a new boyfriend. It's all over her facebook. She's been complaining recently about been single.

There seems to be a pattern when people get together. Judging from her facebook, she liked him, told all her friends, they must have told him and he did something about it. They become a couple. Simple as that !

I always have a feeling of 'not been as good as everybody else' when this happens. I've been single all my life mostly, seen loads of people hook up with each other. I have that feeling that I'm not good enough for dating, women don't like me, I never get set up with anybody. All those crushes I had with women were just that; crushes. None of them were ever interested. No signs that I am missing. Just nothing. No interest.

Anyway, from that it's obvious why I'm clinging on to that woman I met last year.

Can anybody relate to feeling like this ?

[Okiedokes]

When I was single, I guess maybe it would bring all these thoughts of when will I meet my guy...or maybe they don't exist. Nowdays, as I've had a couple relationships..one being pretty long now, it's like well that's great... but I can see some of them splitting up in a few months or so. Is that cynical or what? lol, but it's just seems to be common. My thoughts are... "slooooooooow dooooooooown". And... "you don't know what their flaws are yet, so stop saying they are perfect". :]

[LoneKiller]

Don't ever say that you aren't as good as everyone else. That's bullshit. Do you have any idea how many people are out there that feel just the same as you?

You are just as good as anyone else. Celebrities are millionaires, people drive Ford Mustangs, people are very attractive, some are none of these.
This doesn't mean that you are less of a person and don't have a bunch of love to offer. Everyone has the right to be happy.

What good is a rich husband or wife if they make your life miserable? Does their fancy car make them a better person? Take the courage you've shown by posting here and use it to find someone that loves you, not your possessions or status in life. To Hell with all the others that seem better than you because they have what you don't.

[Sci-Fi]

Honestly, I get a bit jealous and sick at the same time with ones that gush over their new "love of their life". How long have you known each other? You've only been dating a week? WTF? Now when people have been together longer and still are so much in love, that's when I get jealous. Wish I could find that. :/

[The Good Citizen]

A good friend off mine was talking about her problems with her new boyfriend, both families seem hell bent on splitting them up on religious grounds I guess. Everyday she has her mother, and sister on her back, his mother is at him or both mothers at each other. Don't know where the dad's are (hiding in the back I guess ).

Anyway point is for the first time I thought, you know being single isn't all that bad. All the grief and misery I was getting 6 months ago, I have none of that at the moment! What you see from the outside is not there all the time, relationships can be a real pain in the ass! I'd always look to be back in one though but I shouldn't forget that there are plus sides to being your own person and being answerable to no one.

[putter65]

(03-15-2012 12:26 AM)The Good Citizen Wrote:  A good friend off mine was talking about her problems with her new boyfriend, both families seem hell bent on splitting them up on religious grounds I guess. Everyday she has her mother, and sister on her back, his mother is at him or both mothers at each other. Don't know where the dad's are (hiding in the back I guess ).

Anyway point is for the first time I thought, you know being single isn't all that bad. All the grief and misery I was getting 6 months ago, I have none of that at the moment! What you see from the outside is not there all the time, relationships can be a real pain in the ass! I'd always look to be back in one though but I shouldn't forget that there are plus sides to being your own person and being answerable to no one.

Oh yes I know what you mean.

If I see some bloke walking with a tribe on screaming kids and a woman who is calling him names, I think 'thank god I am not in his shoes !'

Alot of the trouble for me was when I was a teenager in the late 80's there wasn't an internet. I thought I was by myself. The only loser around. Everybody else was dating and I wasn't.

Of course now I know, loads of single people about, loads of poor people who haven't been on a single date in their lives.

---

(03-15-2012 12:06 AM)Sci-Fi Wrote:  Honestly, I get a bit jealous and sick at the same time with ones that gush over their new "love of their life". How long have you known each other? You've only been dating a week? WTF? Now when people have been together longer and still are so much in love, that's when I get jealous. Wish I could find that. :/

Women tend to go on and on about their new fella. They make them seem perfect, somebody like Brad Pitt. And then you get to see them and they don't seem that special. Just some normal bloke.

The thing I used to think when I was in my late teens / early twenties was 'when is it my turn ?' - when ?

I don't tend to think like that anymore.

[Lost Drifter]

Upon hearing that someone has a new partner in their lives my first reaction is akin to "You? Really? But you’re mean/racist/arrogant/smell of cabbage" and I walk away all the more confused. My second reaction is more envy at how easy they do it, I swear the "friends" do all the leg work with the "couple" just getting together afterwards, I wish I had friends that would hook me up with someone like that.

Like Okiedokes though I do tend to think "slow down before you crash" kids. I see a lot of younger couples rush head first into everything these days, I know it’s a lot about the impatience of youth but it seems that some couples are picking out baby names not long after their first date. Sure there comes a gush of excitement with a new romance but people need to be realistic too, all this nonsense about calming them to be the love of your life (or getting their names tattooed) within a couple of days is worrying.

I do know what you mean about feeling not been as good as everybody else though putter65. I often feel like the grunt, the person there to do the dirty work and move on to the next job with no concern about happiness and well-being, I’m not entitled to things like that. It’s like someone somewhere is cracking down that whip and telling me to move along and get back to work the second I start wanting things. Always on the outside looking in, always having to make do without ever being satisfied. It’s not so much that I want what others have but to have what I want if that makes sense. Like I’m not envious of the man with a wife and three kids because he has a wife and three kids, I’m envious because he seems to have what he wants while I’m still going without.

*CRACK*

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

I feel a bit jealous that they're experiencing something I never have, but also feel good for them as well.

It's a mixture of emotions.

[AFrozenSoul]

Well I can relate to being annoyed by the sudden celebration that most people seem to have once they "get together". Otherwise, it does not bother me much. Because people leave me alone when I make them awkward by not giving a damn.

[Peter Lorre]

I feel happy for them.