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shocktop2012

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I'm not sure where this belongs, but wanted to bring it up since I don't have anyone that can help me.

I've got a good job that many people would love to have but I desperately need a change - a change in work and change in living situation. I feel totally stuck in life. I don't know what I really want to be doing as a career or where I want to be living. For the past 7 years I have been living with my parents since graduating college, which is nice in some respects, but makes me feel like a child.

The problem is that whenever I have the opportunity to change and do something different, I can never take the step. I never moved out of my parents house, even though I had the chance. I applied to business school so that I could expand my social circle and potentially make a career change. I turned down two offers from amazing schools because all I could think about were the negatives and not the positives.

How have you all been able to push through these made up barriers? I should feel free since I really have no responsibility other than work. No kids, no mortgage or anyone to depend on me and a healthy savings. Yet I feel so tied down and unable to move. The only way to change is for me to do something, but I feel paralyzed...
 
shocktop2012 said:
The problem is that whenever I have the opportunity to change and do something different, I can never take the step.

How have you all been able to push through these made up barriers?

The only way to change is for me to do something, but I feel paralyzed...
Click to expand...

I do not know what you are going through exactly or what keeps you from taking opportunity but if you are aware of your barriers that you have set I think you have the ability to overcome them when you are ready? maybe you need a little push ?

I know what you mean by paralyzing yourself though. I tend to over think and can analyze excessively. It is a slow process for me to push myself and challenge my fears. I kept myself from going to the gym because I was afraid of others judging me and such, at some point I was able to get out of my head (if you know my meaning). It only took a few trips to the gym to get rid of that negative thought.
 
I remember going through a high wire confidence course with the Army, where on one section I got caught hanging from a ring 40 feet from the ground, unable to get enough momentum to swing to the next hold. I remember watching my fingers as they began slowly slipping off, and hearing somebody way down below say "He's gonna fall" -- we'll, I didn't. I thought "Screw you" and found something extra, some reserve of strength and courage I didn't think I had. My point is, your head is the only thing holding you back. You can do it, so just do it (this motivational speech proudly brought to you by Nike).
 
shocktop2012 said:
I'm not sure where this belongs, but wanted to bring it up since I don't have anyone that can help me.

I've got a good job that many people would love to have but I desperately need a change - a change in work and change in living situation. I feel totally stuck in life. I don't know what I really want to be doing as a career or where I want to be living. For the past 7 years I have been living with my parents since graduating college, which is nice in some respects, but makes me feel like a child.

The problem is that whenever I have the opportunity to change and do something different, I can never take the step. I never moved out of my parents house, even though I had the chance. I applied to business school so that I could expand my social circle and potentially make a career change. I turned down two offers from amazing schools because all I could think about were the negatives and not the positives.

How have you all been able to push through these made up barriers? I should feel free since I really have no responsibility other than work. No kids, no mortgage or anyone to depend on me and a healthy savings. Yet I feel so tied down and unable to move. The only way to change is for me to do something, but I feel paralyzed...
Click to expand...

I dont mean to burst your bubble.. but i am going to say that almost no one here has your problem. in fact, everyone here probably would wish to be in your shoes. Good job, no responsibilities.

And by good job, you do mean that you CAN move out and support yourself right? say there is an apartment down the street (so same commute to job), you can afford it no problem right? yup, im sure 90% of us here would love to be in your situation.

living with parents at your age (im going to guess at least 25) does project a negative image. It shows either your financial or emotional dependency (whether true or not, thats the image).

No, i have not had the opportunity to make decisions you are having problems making. I would definitely say though, just do it. yes there are unknown factors involved, but im assuming that you are fully capable of calculating all the pros and cons on all known facts (minus the unknown factors, which is about 10%). so, just take that small leap and do it. take a deep breath, have eagle hunting eyes, run, and jump!
 
You need to summon the willpower somehow. Discover how you can become driven. Aspirations? Want for a relationship? Shame? Something different motivates everyone.

I know somebody like you. If he ever does break from his beloved comfort zone, I'll let you know how he did it.
 
^ Yeah. Just don't think too much about the negatives. They will always be there - sometimes you gotta take risks and be careful of the negatives that may come.

When you see an opportunity for a better job or life or situation, like they say, just do it. Of course, do plan things out and make sure it all works for you in your life, but the "what ifs"? You can keep them at the back of your mind but don't let them rule your decision.
 

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