When two people go out on a date for the first time...

When two people go out on a date for the first time, who pays? Does it matter?

If I ask someone to accompany me somewhere, I pay.

EveWasFramed said:

If I ask someone to accompany me somewhere, I pay.

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But what if it's a first date, like what Nal asked? Who do you think should pay?

I personally don't know who should but I would offer to, anyway.

ladyforsaken said:

EveWasFramed said:

If I ask someone to accompany me somewhere, I pay.

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But what if it's a first date, like what Nal asked? Who do you think should pay?

I personally don't know who should but I would offer to, anyway.

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lol, my answer would be the same. If I asked someone out on a first date (or ANY date) Id pay. If someone asked ME out (on a first date, or otherwise) they can pay.

^Interesting! So have you asked guys out on dates before then?

I wouldn't pay for her unless I know that money is a problem for her.

I feel that for two adults that supposedly have their own income, if one pays for the date, that degrades both of them.

If she tells me to pay at the end of the date, no matter if I asked her out or not, I'll pay, and never talk to her again.

ladyforsaken said:

^Interesting! So have you asked guys out on dates before then?

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Not in the romantic sense, no. For me, that rule applies to anyone I ask to "accompany" me (as I said in my initial response).
For example...if I ask one of my brothers or my brother's girlfriend to go to a movie with me, I pay, because I invited them, you see.

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perfanoff said:

I wouldn't pay for her unless I know that money is a problem for her.

I feel that for two adults that supposedly have their own income, if one pays for the date, that degrades both of them.

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Interesting....
I don't feel it's degrading to pay if I invite someone to go do something.

I usually prefer to split the bill, or pay half. If I don't have money at the time, then I will allow them to pay and would return the favor next time.

I prefer to split. I consider it uncomfortable for strangers or almost-strangers to buy me things, and if worst comes to worst it's less rude to leave early.

Naturally, I'd pay.

The way I see it, if I as a girl out, I wouldn't expect her to pay. It's also a common courtesy thing, kinda like holding a door open for her. But I hear some women exploit this courtesy, if this was the case; I'd ask for my money back, haha.

If she said she wanted to contribute it's not like i'd have a problem with that.

The guy should pay IMO. I even pay when I have lunch or a coffee or whatever with a normal female friend. Usually she'll pay something for me another time (a ticket for a party or something), so it kind of evens out.

I just don't really care that much about money, obviously I'm not paying everything for a girl, but if we don't split the costs I don't mind either. I hate people who are very strict about that.

If I'm trying to impress on a 1st date, I'd pay. Equally, if the date happens down to my insistence over her reticence, then I'd pay so she didn't feel aggrieved that should the date had sucked, she had to pay for the night to have sucked.

longer into the relationship, unless I was trying to do something nice (romantic gesture, birthday etc) then I'd expect us both to pay.

Neon

Date...date...kind of rings a bell...can't quite remember what it is though?

Guy, always. Even if a girl has asked me, I still pay.

9006 said:

Naturally, I'd pay.

The way I see it, if I as a girl out, I wouldn't expect her to pay. It's also a common courtesy thing, kinda like holding a door open for her. But I hear some women exploit this courtesy, if this was the case; I'd ask for my money back, haha.

If she said she wanted to contribute it's not like i'd have a problem with that.

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It's nice to see a true gentleman! I doubt people would want to know my opinion on this thread But a man who shows chivalry is an attrative man (because he cares enough to take care of the woman he is with) and shame on any female who would take advantage of his kindness. I don't subscribe to the I did you a favor (bought you dinner) now you owe me a favor. I guess Im one who looks for the kindness in someone. I also look to see how they treat waite staff or anyone in the service field. One man I was interested in was nasty to a waiter. I never went out with him again becase of that. It's nice to see gentleman and chivalry still exist.

If I ask her out, I'll pay. If she asks me out (wishful thinking), then she can pay. I'm not opposed to splitting the bill though in either case. And do people still use the word chivalry nowadays?

Never really dated a Girl. But whenever I've gone out with one, I've offered to pay for whatever we spend money on.

Unfortunately chivalry in the modern world (and by all accounts, the medieval world, too) is this:

perfanoff said:

Unfortunately chivalry in the modern world (and by all accounts, the medieval world, too) is this:

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Does anyone else see someone bitter? Or is this just me?

also this

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about paying: I find it very confusing, if I ask someone out I can't very well expect them to pay, right? And when they pay, I do appreciate it of course, but it's also like a role-play, during a date, most of us make an effort to fit in the stereotype and show how much woman or man one can be, so yes, there is a little of expectation on the side of a guy paying, it's a cultural thing, but in the end it all boils down to how nice it is being offered something, and yes, I would insist on paying the following time.
Actually it's the same with friends, splitting can give a cold feeling, especially if they had steak and I had one beer.