Feeling hopeless and unmotivated for the first time in a while

For some reason, I'm feeling really dark. I mean, everything in my head feels really dark and negative and effed-up.

And I feel completely unmotivated to do anything. In short, I've given up to even for a positive tomorrow. I don't see anything good happening. It might just be my depression speaking but I don't know what's wrong. Never felt like this.

I feel like pushing everyone away and going to a remote place, digging myself a hole and just lying there till I rot. I have practically stopped speaking to anyone outside of my family and from my family, my mom is the only one I talk to (not conversing, just the basic yes's and no's).

Anyone else ever felt like this?

Yes. I've lost contact with a lot of people because of this feeling and once they're gone, they're gone. I know it's hard now but it'll be harder in the future when you realize that you could really do with those people in your life. As hard as it is I would really try to not let your depression make decisions for you, nothing good can come of it.

I hope things improve for you. I'm always willing to listen if you need to let off steam.

Runciter said:

I hope things improve for you. I'm always willing to listen if you need to let off steam.

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Thank you Runciter. I don't know if I have anything to rant or even talk about. I'm just withering away like a piece of furniture when I should be living. It's so sad that I'm wasting my life like this.

Of course, I'm not comparing myself to others but I feel like I should at least be some of the stuff that others my age are doing. I know everyone is different but I don't want to be this different.

I don't have the strength, physical or mental to change how things are...

I cut off contact with my friends, ran away from my problems and hid for years. It just made things worse. It is the depression that is making you feel like this. Finding a hole to hide in and cutting off all ties with people will guarantee that you won't see a bright future. You're better off making a stand against your problems where you are, and letting the people closest to you know how you feel.

Locke said:

I cut off contact with my friends, ran away from my problems and hid for years. It just made things worse. It is the depression that is making you feel like this. Finding a hole to hide in and cutting off all ties with people will guarantee that you won't see a bright future. You're better off making a stand against your problems where you are, and letting the people closest to you know how you feel.

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I completely agree with this.

SomeoneSomewhere said:

I don't have the strength, physical or mental to change how things are...

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I was exactly like this for a long time. However, I found that strength is that can be changed.

The thing that helped me most was exercise. Seriously, start working out every other day. You don't have to go to the gym or lift loads of weights, just go for a jog, do sit-ups and pushups, anything to get your heart pumping. You'll become more physically strong but the real benefit is the change it has on your mental strength. The amount of testosterone and endorphins released when you push yourself gives you a massive boost. I get a huge natural high after exercising and it makes me feel great about myself. I cannot recommend this enough. It's a great way to boost your self-esteem and the added bonus of the health benefits are huge.

I want to point out that I have never been a fitness fanatic and really don't go in for all the macho bullshit that often goes with it.

Runciter said:

I want to point out that I have never been a fitness fanatic and really don't go in for all the macho bullshit that often goes with it.

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That's the funny part. I used to love working out and was really passionate about it. I've tried both gymming and the equipment less stuff and I was good at both. I can practically teach someone a million different push-ups (I'm not kidding). It was one of the things that got me going.

But now, as I said, I can't even find the strength to. One of my friends asked if I wanted to go with him and exercise and I said I didn't, just because I feel no motivation to (I can't even drag myself to go there).

I never even get out of my own home as long as I do not have to. I got out today in over 3 weeks but that's because I had to (in part, I forced myself to but that's a different story).

I agree about working out. I haven't in close to a month and have felt like crap this month.

Just do anything to get yourself started. You can buy a jump-rope and do that at home for twenty minutes a day just to get back into it.

Jumping rope is one of the best and easiest exercises you can do. It has all the benefits of running but is much easier on your knees and joints and you don't need to go outside to do it.

SomeoneSomewhere said:

That's the funny part. I used to love working out and was really passionate about it. I've tried both gymming and the equipment less stuff and I was good at both. I can practically teach someone a million different push-ups (I'm not kidding). It was one of the things that got me going.

But now, as I said, I can't even find the strength to. One of my friends asked if I wanted to go with him and exercise and I said I didn't, just because I feel no motivation to (I can't even drag myself to go there).

I never even get out of my own home as long as I do not have to. I got out today in over 3 weeks but that's because I had to (in part, I forced myself to but that's a different story).

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I feel for you, really I do. I've been in the exact same position as you. But you'll never find the motivation just sitting at home. Force yourself into that first session and that will help get you motivated. You forced yourself to go out today so I'm sure you can force yourself to do 20 minutes of exercise. You might not believe in yourself at the moment but I do. You can do it.

Also, would you mind if I PMed you at some point for some advice on different push ups for different muscles?

Runciter said:

Also, would you mind if I PMed you at some point for some advice on different push ups for different muscles?

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Not at all! Feel free to PM me any time. It's been a while since I did my last push up so I must have forgotten a lot but I'll try to do my best to help you out.