Pregnant girl in college

Okay so this isn't coming from me. It's someone else's issue. There's this website called blahtherapy where you can help random people who are venting their issues. I was bored and wanted to help people out so I decided to give it a try and came across a girl in college who is pregnant.

From what I'm hearing, there is this guy at her university who lives near her. He just broke up with someone and just wanted... sex with no strings attached. I guess she fell for him because now, she might be pregnant. She hasn't confirmed with a doctor yet but she took a pregnancy test and it was positive.

I tried to give her the best advice I could coming from a guy in high school who has never experienced something like this before 0_0

An abortion is against her beliefs. But this guy whoever he is has been encouraging her to get one. He's saying that they're both not ready for this, and it will be an unhealthy life for the child. Obviously he's right. I told her that she should be prepared to raise this kid with/without that guy. I highly doubt that he'll be there for her or care for the child like a real man would. I even heard that he's "in love" with another girl. I asked her to consider adoption too.

It's really sad for me to know that there might be a child out there growing up without a dad and not the best life. I for one, was raised by two parents who had did it the "right way". They got married and everything before they had me. EVEN THEN, my dad left us for another slut, and I've been growing up without a dad ever since 7th grade :/.

We swapped emails and I told her she could email me if she needs any help.

What do you guys think? Did I do the right thing. I know it's someone random over the internet, but I just feel so bad for the kid .

I can't see anything wrong with what you said.

murmi97 said:

I can't see anything wrong with what you said.

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To the woman, no, that was pretty standard advice. Since abortion is against her beliefs she shouldn't let him push her into it, adoption is her best option. There are a lot of people out there waiting to adopt a baby.

I do have one issue with the way you worded one thing.

GrannySmith111 said:

It's really sad for me to know that there might be a child out there growing up without a dad and not the best life. I for one, was raised by two parents who had did it the "right way". They got married and everything before they had me. EVEN THEN, my dad left us for another slut, and I've been growing up without a dad ever since 7th grade :/.

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Who says that is the "right way"? I grew up without a dad, saw mine only a handful of times before he died when I was 14. He barely ever visited my brother and I and we were much better off with it that way, he was a drunk and a womanizer. Children can grow up just fine with a single parent. There might be things you miss out on not having the other parent around but that doesn't mean it's the wrong way either. Don't really know if you meant it that way, but it's the way it came off to me.

Well, it's not the best way to grow up without one parent. Kids deserve better than that, especially newborns. In this woman's situation, it's pretty obvious she's not ready for a child. The guy is apparently in love with ANOTHER woman. He's encouraging her to get an abortion because this will "ruin" his life. She told me about how she was like this guy's sex buddy. He would text her at like 3am in the morning to come downstairs to his room and she would just go with it.

I can't really contribute to the topic, but thanks for mentioning Blahtherapy, I've enjoyed helping people on there today,

GrannySmith111 said:

Well, it's not the best way to grow up without one parent. Kids deserve better than that, especially newborns. In this woman's situation, it's pretty obvious she's not ready for a child. The guy is apparently in love with ANOTHER woman. He's encouraging her to get an abortion because this will "ruin" his life. She told me about how she was like this guy's sex buddy. He would text her at like 3am in the morning to come downstairs to his room and she would just go with it.

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Who says it's not? Sorry but I take this much more personally having grown up in a single parent home. Look around here, there are many people who have grown up in a "traditional" family, some have been raised by grandparents, aunts and uncles, single home, gay/lesbian homes, supportive homes, abusive homes, and we're in the same boat, most here for the same reason. So just because someone doesn't grow up in a traditional family home doesn't mean it's not the best way to grow up.

Sci-Fi said:

Who says that is the "right way"?

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I must agree that sometimes, a child is better off missing a parent.
My own father was a malicious jerk, who mentally, emotionally, physically and psychologically abused his children. It's a good thing he left. No child should be kept in an environment like that just so they can have two parents.
I know the OP didn't mean anything by his comment and I do think that two parents is the ideal situation for bringing up a child whenever possible.
Just my two cents and a bit off topic at that.

Lots of people say it's the, "right way", though that isn't necessarily true. I figured that's why it was put in quotation marks? My stepmother pushed me into getting married, saying the same crap. It was the, "right thing" to do, even though I really didn't think it was.

I'm raising my kid without her father, and I'm so very very glad he's not in the picture. It would be nice if he wasn't a deadbeat dad, but I'd rather have zero child support and him not around to wreck her life than have him financially contributing and making her miserable.

Obviously if a parent is bad, then it's better off for the child not to have that parent. But wouldn't it be better off for any child to have two good parents anyways? All of the cases you guys are talking about include one of the parents not being a very good parent.

If you hadn't said this kid would have "not the best life" due to growing up without a Dad, people wouldn't be commenting on this. Nobody is perfect, and so there's no child out there who has two perfect parents. There are kids in single parent households having better lives than kids with both parents around. There are kids being raised by other relatives or even friends of the family... but I wouldn't say that means their lives aren't "the best".