Never enough....

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Yamira

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These days I feel it more than everything... The feeling of being not enough. I feel that everybody else has a better life, is prettier, has a better education/job, is adored more, has a lot of friends....

Its just I feel like failure. Even though people close to me tell me I´m not. But of course they say this, they probably wouldn´t be honest if they think different.

Do you feel the same? Is there a solution for it?
 
I've felt the same before. It's hard, but you have to remember that life is not a competition. Every person, regardless of what you know and/or think you see, has problems that you don't know about. Struggles that make their life not perfect. Each person likely feels that their life could be better in some aspect.

There is a solution for it. Stop comparing your life to others. When you do that, you make yourself feel worse and eventually you get to the point where you don't think you're good enough and you'll never have what you want. Stop comparing and start living. Change your routine or find a new one. Find a hobby and meet new people. Try new things and never give up. And most of all, stop being so hard on yourself. You are not a failure, you just haven't found the right path for yourself yet.
 
TheRealCallie said:
I've felt the same before. It's hard, but you have to remember that life is not a competition. Every person, regardless of what you know and/or think you see, has problems that you don't know about. Struggles that make their life not perfect. Each person likely feels that their life could be better in some aspect.

There is a solution for it. Stop comparing your life to others. When you do that, you make yourself feel worse and eventually you get to the point where you don't think you're good enough and you'll never have what you want. Stop comparing and start living. Change your routine or find a new one. Find a hobby and meet new people. Try new things and never give up. And most of all, stop being so hard on yourself. You are not a failure, you just haven't found the right path for yourself yet.

i 2nd that...very well said TRC :)

yamira...keep your chin up :)
 
I don't normally speak like this... but TRUE DAT! You certainly aren't a failure. You will fail, and make mistakes, but so will everybody. So it's fine. The best thing you can do is learn from them.
 
Nobody is a failure, and nobody is perfect. We all have our strengths and weaknesses. I know you have strengths. Looks like you just need to find them first.

I felt that way too once. I hated myself for who I was (I have Asperger's) and saw myself as worthless. What changed my mind though, was trying different things until I found what I could do. Try out new hobbies for instance that you've never done before. You might surprise yourself. Still can't find them? Oh well. Might as well try to enjoy yourself while you're doing it, right? Nobody is a failure. Hope you find your strengths soon.

Good luck. :)
 
I feel the same way Yamira. I always look around, and when I compare myself to others I get this sensation of simply failure. I try, i really do try to change the way I perceive and view this, but I can't.
 
Yamira said:
These days I feel it more than everything... The feeling of being not enough. I feel that everybody else has a better life, is prettier, has a better education/job, is adored more, has a lot of friends....

Its just I feel like failure. Even though people close to me tell me I´m not. But of course they say this, they probably wouldn´t be honest if they think different.

Do you feel the same? Is there a solution for it?

The problem with todays society is that there's so much sharing or personal information (Like through social networking more than anything) that you often find your comparing yourself to others like this.

I sometimes used to do this, but you just have to concentrate on your own life and not what everyone else is doing. Other thing is to accept yourself, because once I compared my status and personal activities to others too, but then I realised that I don't have the same interests as them, I do honeysuckle that makes me happy.
 
I'm a physician, so let me tell you bluntly: every last one of these people is going to ultimately contract a disabling, painful disease and die. 100% of them. All of their beautiful children will as well. You and me too.

You have one life to live before that happens, make the choices you want to make.
 
Up until some days ago I felt the same, that's exactly why I joined these forums.

I felt like a big failure, worse than everyone else, never accepted any compliment as they "say it to make me feel nice" etc, I didnt feel that i deserve the girl im in love with etc...
My solution? Stop. Stop feeling like this. Noone is perfect, and sure as hell, you're not the worst. Start believing in yourself. You'll fail, you'll make mistakes, but in the long run it'll be worth it. Start living your life, be happy! As people posted on my thread, be positive on yourself. The best advice I've heard so far <3

Try to find out something you're good at and like, and keep doing it. Especially if it's a group hobby kind of thing, people will compliment you, and you'll accept it and feel nice as you know they mean it

Best of luck, just remember that you're not worse than anyone!
 
lonelydoc said:
I'm a physician, so let me tell you bluntly: every last one of these people is going to ultimately contract a disabling, painful disease and die. 100% of them. All of their beautiful children will as well. You and me too.

You have one life to live before that happens, make the choices you want to make.

Wow wise worlds. i wish i could "take" my life. Only me is bedeviling my life.
 
I'm not at all sure they are wise words at all....they show a complete lack of understanding of the mindset that goes with depression...and is basically untrue. We all die, the way in which we die will be an individual experience I find it very difficult to give you any credibility at all as a Doctor...such a callous attitude and ignorance and a desire to present people with options they are not able to take advantage of just doesn't bear this out...I think if you were a Doctor you would be as likely to inflict as much damage on your patients as you are yourself
 
I'm honestly probably more of a failure than you are and believe I will to some extent always be. I dislike basically everything about myself. I'm an idiot and I don't think I have much of anything substantial or of value to contribute to anyone. Most of the time I don't have much to say. My soul is an empty hollowed out abyss, as shamelessly melodramatic as that sounds. I'm not capable of really relating to people on any significant level. I think I'm a broken and defective excuse of a human being and I don't really see much of a life awaiting me. I probably am not that bad looks wise, though not that great either. Although once I open my mouth it all goes to hell. I sure wouldn't be friends with me and I can't understand why anyone else would want to. Sometimes I can't look at myself due to embarassment. For now I live inside the walls I've built for myself. I understand many people on here have it worse, but I feel pathetic and like more of a failure than almost everyone I know in life.But honestly the whole socially accepted treadmill of what constitutes success is a load of bull anyway. Theoretically you could always have a better job, or more things, or be more popular, the whole wanting more addiction never really ends. For myself, I'd like to be more fully self-supporting, but if you can support yourself, you really should live for yourself and what you want rather than where you are "supposed to be". You may not like your job and want more friends and that is understandable, but you shouldn't tie your job or friends in with your self-worth. Those things don't really help as much as you'd think, and there's always more things to feel bad about. I think I am a failure for reasons independent of my next to nil job or social success, though then again, that certainly doesn't help.
 

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