I have this strange feeling that no one likes me...

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BlackCat

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Title says it all. I have great friends too, and I have talked this over with them and they all respect me as a friend like they normally should. But... I still feel like no one likes me. That no one in the world really needs me. It's a pretty horrible feeling that I haven't been able to push away for my entire life. Any help or suggestions?
 
Well just because You never hear someone say "I like You" or something similar which pretty much means the same it doesn't mean that nobody does, or that nobody could. For example, apart from after i've spent some time helping someone and might get a "Thanks" for it, which happens surprisingly seldom actually, i pretty much never get to hear (or read) that i'm liked for any reason. When we got the chat-room up here it apparently became less of a hassle to thank someone (since i've noticed that feelings for others are expressed much more freely in there for some reason), so if You feel like You're not needed, perhaps You could start helping others in some way in the chat, and i'm sure You'd feel alot more useful.

When it comes to real life, i can't even remember the last time that someone implied that they like me in some way. People seem to be much more careful with what they say in real life than, for example, in a chat-room, and alot of people in todays society actually has big problems with expressing their feelings in a healthy way, which probably is a big factor in Your case too. People also expect so much from others these days, so to actually being able to "officially" say that You're helpful (which is one of the easiest ways to become fond of others) it often takes alot more work than we think.

For what it's worth; i talk to so many people at this community alone that i have a hard time remembering whom i've talked about what with and so on, but my feelings never fool me, and for some reason i get glad when i see Your username. =) I just remember something positive about You from somewhere (the chat i think it was), and that's all i need to remember right now. ;)
 
I think Robin covered most of it there.

Its true that ppl don't say how they really feel for fear of rejection.

ppl do expect to much and they also take ppl for granted. I bet you have ppl in your life yourself that you love and respect but never say. Your mum or dad for instants. just because you never tell them or anyone that you love that you love them dose not mean you care any less for them.

As for ppl not liking you. All I can say to that is I don't see how. I mean you come across on here as a friendly guy and someone I would have NP in going out for a drink with.

I think maybe you worry to much about whether someone likes you or not. What you should be doing is concentrating on liking your self. Be yourself and the best person you can be and let ppl come to there own conclusions in whether or not they like you. They well anyway whether you wont them to or not.

Maybe the bi thing could put some guys of from being friends? I know guys that it would if am honest. But the way I would see that is if that puts anyone of from being your friend then there narrow mindedness has done you a favor as I would say someone like that would not make a very good friend anyway. There loss. I do know that some ppl in this world would not know what a good friend was if it hit them in the face.

My advice is just concentrate on liking your self. when you have done that the rest well fallow.
 
BlackCat said:
Title says it all. I have great friends too, and I have talked this over with them and they all respect me as a friend like they normally should. But... I still feel like no one likes me. That no one in the world really needs me. It's a pretty horrible feeling that I haven't been able to push away for my entire life. Any help or suggestions?

((((((((((((((((((((((((((Black Cat))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
((((((((((((((((Black Cat)))))))))))))))))) (((((((Black Cat))))))))))))
(((((((((((((((((Black Cat))))))))))))))))))))))))))
So sorry you are feeling that way, little one. I don't believe anyone comes into this world who is not needed. You are needed whether you are able to see that right now in your life or not. I'm around if you want to talk.
 
Thanks for the constructive replies. Yes. I cannot remember when I was thanked for something, even though I know the person appreciated it. That is usually enough for me, but as of late it doesn't seem like it is. I'm tired of feeling under appreciated for the things I do for people. I make the extra step just so my friends and loved ones are satisfied. I get no thanks for what I do. After that, as of late, I get to thinking well maybe I just did all of this for no reason. Maybe what I did didn't matter to them anyways.

After talking to my friends about this on AIM, they all appreciate me and all of that so it SHOULD be good. But I still have the feeling. Maybe this is happening because of my low self esteem?

@Bluey: You wouldn't be able to tell the difference between me and a straight guy if you met me, I would have to tell you.

@Robin: Who are you in chat?
 
BlackCat said:
Title says it all. I have great friends too, and I have talked this over with them and they all respect me as a friend like they normally should. But... I still feel like no one likes me. That no one in the world really needs me. It's a pretty horrible feeling that I haven't been able to push away for my entire life. Any help or suggestions?

Dude. You registered one week ago and you already have THREE positive reps! SOMEONE likes you, lol! Oh wait a minute...I do believe that I was the first one to give you that rep!:D
I understand that you're feeling like nobody likes you, and I can't offer any advice, never having been in that exact situation. But, people DO like you, Cat.
ME being one of them!!!
THANKS for all the smiles you've given me.
(((hugs)))

PS. About the people never thank you thing: Dude. I could write a book on thankless people. Couldn't I, Naleena? :p
 
BlackCat said:
I'm tired of feeling under appreciated for the things I do for people. I make the extra step just so my friends and loved ones are satisfied. I get no thanks for what I do. After that, as of late, I get to thinking well maybe I just did all of this for no reason. Maybe what I did didn't matter to them anyways.

Black Cat,
Maybe you should consider taking a break from doing so much for everyone. You have to take care of yourself and it looks like you might need some time and a little TLC. "Givers" sometimes get into ruts where they need to recharge their batteries. Take care of you first :) I'm still here, kiddo, if ya wanna talk.
 
BlackCat said:
@Bluey: You wouldn't be able to tell the difference between me and a straight guy if you met me, I would have to tell you.

@Robin: Who are you in chat?[/color][/font]

Well you do look like a normal run of the mill guy in the pick you put up here. Well you are a normal guy. But am guessing that most of your mates would know about that as you would have told them. But ether way it should make no difference.

If I may on Robin's behalf, Robin always goes by hes name Robin.
 
I know the feeling and don't really have any idea how you change it.

BlackCat said:
Maybe this is happening because of my low self esteem?

That would seem quite possible. You mention that you have great friends. That in it's self pretty much says that they like you.

Just speaking generally people often aren't as good about saying thanks as could be.
 
I would wager money that it is your self-esteem talking, and that you are well liked. Doubt is a dangerous thing to have with respect to family and friends.
 

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