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M_also_lonely

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 18, 2014
Messages
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Location
India
Yesterday a music band from our state visited our college. There was a huge concert. I had never been to a concert before. For the first time, when I went there, I saw people shouting like crazy animals, especially girls. As soon as the singer speaks a word, they shout like this is their last day.
As if the singers were a part of their blood. They used to sing along with the band. And dancing like anything.One of the girls has tattooed the singers name on both of her hands, permanent.

I mean what have those guys done so great. And how? I want to do that too.... Even I want to see how it feels like when people see me with their eyes and mouth wide open and not able to believe that they saw me. I want to become famous and popular too. I just dont know, how to do it.

Well, I cant become a singer, because I never sing well, and dont know how to write a song. And dont know how to look good, handsome and smart and imprrssive and different and talented.
 
I've always found girls that are into musicians a massive (football/fooballers, celebs, trashy culture in general)turn off, wasn't really sure how to articulate it properly. Think this video more or less explains it.

[video=youtube]
 
M_also_lonely said:
Yesterday a music band from our state visited our college. There was a huge concert. I had never been to a concert before. For the first time, when I went there, I saw people shouting like crazy animals, especially girls. As soon as the singer speaks a word, they shout like this is their last day.
As if the singers were a part of their blood. They used to sing along with the band. And dancing like anything.One of the girls has tattooed the singers name on both of her hands, permanent.

I mean what have those guys done so great. And how? I want to do that too.... Even I want to see how it feels like when people see me with their eyes and mouth wide open and not able to believe that they saw me. I want to become famous and popular too. I just dont know, how to do it.

Well, I cant become a singer, because I never sing well, and dont know how to write a song. And dont know how to look good, handsome and smart and imprrssive and different and talented.

That's been happening for 50 years. Elvis, The Beatles.
Some females tend to like groups or singers completely based on their looks. The music is secondary and not that important.

It just happens and you should just forget about it.
 
Triple Bogey said:
M_also_lonely said:
Yesterday a music band from our state visited our college. There was a huge concert. I had never been to a concert before. For the first time, when I went there, I saw people shouting like crazy animals, especially girls. As soon as the singer speaks a word, they shout like this is their last day.
As if the singers were a part of their blood. They used to sing along with the band. And dancing like anything.One of the girls has tattooed the singers name on both of her hands, permanent.

I mean what have those guys done so great. And how? I want to do that too.... Even I want to see how it feels like when people see me with their eyes and mouth wide open and not able to believe that they saw me. I want to become famous and popular too. I just dont know, how to do it.

Well, I cant become a singer, because I never sing well, and dont know how to write a song. And dont know how to look good, handsome and smart and imprrssive and different and talented.

That's been happening for 50 years. Elvis, The Beatles.
Some females tend to like groups or singers completely based on their looks. The music is secondary and not that important.

It just happens and you should just forget about it.

So you mean I wouldn't and shouldn't get to know how it feels to be that much popular
 
Even if you were the lead singer in a band and had girls screaming your name and fainting at your concerts you could still be deeply lonely. People would love your image but they would not really know you as a person. It is not real popularity. I was a Rod Stewart fan as a young teenager and I used to scream at his concerts, but all I knew about him came from magazines. To be honest, I think it is far more satisfying to make relationships with people properly and to be known and loved by a few rather than to be worshipped by but not be known to the many. If you do want to become famous, try to make sure that you always have a few people around you who know and love you as you are, behind the fame.
 
M_also_lonely said:
Triple Bogey said:
M_also_lonely said:
Yesterday a music band from our state visited our college. There was a huge concert. I had never been to a concert before. For the first time, when I went there, I saw people shouting like crazy animals, especially girls. As soon as the singer speaks a word, they shout like this is their last day.
As if the singers were a part of their blood. They used to sing along with the band. And dancing like anything.One of the girls has tattooed the singers name on both of her hands, permanent.

I mean what have those guys done so great. And how? I want to do that too.... Even I want to see how it feels like when people see me with their eyes and mouth wide open and not able to believe that they saw me. I want to become famous and popular too. I just dont know, how to do it.

Well, I cant become a singer, because I never sing well, and dont know how to write a song. And dont know how to look good, handsome and smart and imprrssive and different and talented.

That's been happening for 50 years. Elvis, The Beatles.
Some females tend to like groups or singers completely based on their looks. The music is secondary and not that important.

It just happens and you should just forget about it.

So you mean I wouldn't and shouldn't get to know how it feels to be that much popular

No forget about thinking why singers are popular.
Remember all it takes is one woman to like you to be with someone.
 
Doesn't matter whether this is important or not...
But I want to do that too....
I want to see how it feels when you are so popular....
I just dont know how to do it...

Its not necessary that if I have any talents, they would make people crazy.....
I want to see how it feels when people want you, want to see you live even for a second.....
But how?? I dont have anything special....
 
M_also_lonely said:
Doesn't matter whether this is important or not...
But I want to do that too....
I want to see how it feels when you are so popular....
I just dont know how to do it...

Its not necessary that if I have any talents, they would make people crazy.....
I want to see how it feels when people want you, want to see you live even for a second.....
But how?? I dont have anything special....
Believing you have nothing special is a problem. Everyone is unique, everyone has something special about themselves. You just need to find it.

But there is another problem here, you are too focused on popularity and desiring to be loved that you are overlooking what is more important. You should focus on finding people who like you for who you are. You don't need popularity for that.

Popularity is actually a lie. Those band members and people like that are loved not for who they are but who the fans think they are. The result is a lot of awkward situations and undeserved attention. Most Celebrities themselves do not even like a lot of the attention they receive due to the fact that they just want to be loved for who they really are and not what other people think they are. Most 'fans' also come to develop expectations that the celebrities cannot reasonably fulfill.

This is true for "popular kids" at school, too, or any other form of popularity. It is often why the "popular" people are often just as hated by others as they are loved by some, and why even many of them are very lonely. They fail to live up to everyone's expectations, because everyone is expecting them to be someone they are really not.

You don't want that. That isn't real. That isn't important. You might think you want that but if you had it you would realize you don't really want it.

What you really want is to be loved for who you really are.
And that requires finding people who will do that and won't expect anything from you. They will just love you.

All it takes to find those people is knowing who you really are and not trying to see someone else in the mirror.
 
Despicable Me said:
M_also_lonely said:
Doesn't matter whether this is important or not...
But I want to do that too....
I want to see how it feels when you are so popular....
I just dont know how to do it...

Its not necessary that if I have any talents, they would make people crazy.....
I want to see how it feels when people want you, want to see you live even for a second.....
But how?? I dont have anything special....
Believing you have nothing special is a problem. Everyone is unique, everyone has something special about themselves. You just need to find it.

But there is another problem here, you are too focused on popularity and desiring to be loved that you are overlooking what is more important. You should focus on finding people who like you for who you are. You don't need popularity for that.

Popularity is actually a lie. Those band members and people like that are loved not for who they are but who the fans think they are. The result is a lot of awkward situations and undeserved attention. Most Celebrities themselves do not even like a lot of the attention they receive due to the fact that they just want to be loved for who they really are and not what other people think they are. Most 'fans' also come to develop expectations that the celebrities cannot reasonably fulfill.

This is true for "popular kids" at school, too, or any other form of popularity. It is often why the "popular" people are often just as hated by others as they are loved by some, and why even many of them are very lonely. They fail to live up to everyone's expectations, because everyone is expecting them to be someone they are really not.

You don't want that. That isn't real. That isn't important. You might think you want that but if you had it you would realize you don't really want it.

What you really want is to be loved for who you really are.
And that requires finding people who will do that and won't expect anything from you. They will just love you.

All it takes to find those people is knowing who you really are and not trying to see someone else in the mirror.

Where to find these people??? I searched all around.
Why would people like me for what I am?? They dont..I wait for everybody, nobody waits for me. I bring for everybody, nobody brings for me. I share with everybody, but nobody shares with me. I respect everybody, but nobody respects me. I care for everybody around me, but nobody does that for me..


You see the situation, if what they do is not much important, people worship them. I always speak politely, I care for others, do anything tjat could make them happy, but at night, I cry realizing the fact that I mean nothing to them, because nobody has ever done anything special for me. Like fans do to their fav. celebs, friends do to their friends.

So obviously, if caring, loving, respecting would make us happy, I would already be happy.But why am I not?


Imagine the band member and myself into a serious disease, together, where would those people go? To me or to them???


I just want to feel special for once. I want to show that I exist, too.
 
M_also_lonely said:
Where to find these people??? I searched all around.
Why would people like me for what I am?? They dont..I wait for everybody, nobody waits for me. I bring for everybody, nobody brings for me. I share with everybody, but nobody shares with me. I respect everybody, but nobody respects me. I care for everybody around me, but nobody does that for me..


You see the situation, if what they do is not much important, people worship them. I always speak politely, I care for others, do anything tjat could make them happy, but at night, I cry realizing the fact that I mean nothing to them, because nobody has ever done anything special for me. Like fans do to their fav. celebs, friends do to their friends.

So obviously, if caring, loving, respecting would make us happy, I would already be happy.But why am I not?
Do you want my honest opinion?
It is because while you care so much about everyone else you are completely forgetting to care about yourself. You have no self esteem. Self esteem is incredibly important. You aren't seeing the real you when you look in the mirror, you're seeing an illusion.

If you want friends, if you want someone who loves you, you need to look in that mirror and see the real you. If you don't know who that person really is, then how will someone else? And if they do, then how would you know it? You would feel like they are looking at someone else who is not you.

Look in the mirror and see the real you:
The person who cares about everyone and just gets bad luck that others are so mean to him.
The person who is so concerned about other people's feelings that he is afraid to stand up for himself.
The person that can go out of his way to care about other people who don't care about him.
And the person that loves the world but is too afraid to really take part in it because he is too preoccupied with becoming someone he is not.

And do not get caught up in superficial appearances, either. The mirror is the real illusion. Allow yourself to see yourself in your own mind, to be the person who you really are and who you really want to be. Don't get caught up in appearances.
A beautiful flower quickly loses its beauty, but a beautiful painting will last as long as those who appreciate it.

You say no one cares about you, but you're probably just overlooking the people who do care. I believe you have mentioned your mom before. Do you really believe she does not care about you? If you have her, that is at least one more than some people get.

Most importantly, the person who really does not love you is you. You need to learn to love yourself. If you do not know how to do that then how is anyone else supposed to know how? Are they supposed to know you better than you even know yourself? Why hold people to such high expectations?

Finding people who are mature, understanding, loving, and caring is difficult. These people are not just around every corner.
And that is exactly why you are special, why you are unique. You are or can be one of those people. Not the celebrity who gets loved for someone they aren't, but you can be someone who gets truly loved for the person they are. Lasting love.
Not everyone gets that opportunity, M. Don't waste it. You already have it, you just don't know it yet.

M_also_lonely said:
I just want to feel special for once. I want to show that I exist, too.
I know. I know what that is like, too. It's not a good feeling.
But you are holding yourself back from the truth - you don't need other people to be happy. You can love yourself and just be happy being yourself.
What could make you feel more special than that? Having the ability to be happy by just being yourself?

When you do realize this it becomes much easier to find other people who will love you, too. And they do love you and will love you. You just aren't looking in the right place yet. This is because you haven't found yourself, yet.

I know it sounds wrong but people are not the answer to loneliness. If this were true then it would not be possible to feel so alone in a crowd, or with other people around.... but it is actually some of those times when we feel most alone.
The solution to loneliness is therefore an internal process. You must discover your true self before you can discover others who are like you. You must know yourself before others can know you. You must love yourself before others can love you.

... Understand? Try.

And by the way, if I didn't care do you think I'd even post? And I don't even know you. Do you realize your potential here? Don't overlook the people who care about you. I'm not going to be around here forever to tell you that.
 
It's easy to do this now.


Do something stupid and put it on youtube...get a bazillion hits....get on tv then. BAM Superstar.
 
The girl tattooed some musician's name on her? Goodness... I love John 5, but I don't think I'd ever tattoo his logo anywhere on me.
 
I like Nicolet's thinking.

OP, "Just be who you are." Except, who exactly are you? What kind of person are you? Do you even know what kind of person you are? You can't expect others to like you for who you are if you don't even know who you are.

People are famous because they all tried. They probably failed many times before they became successful. Then, think of all the people that aren't successful, are they miserable? No, they enjoy doing what they do and even a small audience is good enough.
 
Hi. You don't know me and this is my first post on the Forum. I would like to thank 'Despicable Me' for such a detailed and wonderful reply to a problem which I can personally identify with.
 

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