suggestions to this lonely life

good afternoon,
i have tried for a while to find a site to vent to.i have no friends anymore due to a little problem i went through in highschool that caused me to stray away from everyone for a few years.
its extremely difficult to stay 100% positive about alot of stuff because i dont want to just be lonely.
I am married (which has diminished to nothing) and i have a son, they are my life. but i am missing out on friends and doing fun things also and its depressing.
I feel like everyone looks at me funny because when i was lonely i kinda found myself and realized that one thing that makes me extremely happy in life is science! i read constantly about the universe and paranormal type stuff and i feel like when i talk about that to anyone they just think im stupid and look at me wierd. its very discouraging.
i guess i dont know what i want from this. just hate feeing so alienated. would be nice to have someone to talk to.

Seems like your problem is that you are trying to socialize with the wrong type of people. Not everyone is into paranormal type of stuff so you're bound to get lots of weird looks. Have you tried other sites or forums which people are into those kinds of things? You might find people in your area, you never know. Not sure how big of an area you live in but some do have lots of clubs to join, might be something to look into.

I love the universe and paranormal stuff. I'm a big fan of them.But when we socialize we have to choose a wider topic where everyone feels identified.

Do you like Futbol? Any sports?Cars?Music?Dancing? Guys usually like that when they go out.Look for people who also have kids. I'm pretty sure you will enjoy that conversation. What about joining an sport with your son in a school team or a private one. You will meet lots of dad with kids. And your kid will love his time with his dad.

Sci-Fi said:

Seems like your problem is that you are trying to socialize with the wrong type of people. Not everyone is into paranormal type of stuff so you're bound to get lots of weird looks. Have you tried other sites or forums which people are into those kinds of things? You might find people in your area, you never know. Not sure how big of an area you live in but some do have lots of clubs to join, might be something to look into.

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very true, i will have to look into something like that.

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Eliraven said:

I love the universe and paranormal stuff. I'm a big fan of them.But when we socialize we have to choose a wider topic where everyone feels identified.

Do you like Futbol? Any sports?Cars?Music?Dancing? Guys usually like that when they go out.Look for people who also have kids. I'm pretty sure you will enjoy that conversation. What about joining an sport with your son in a school team or a private one. You will meet lots of dad with kids. And your kid will love his time with his dad.

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ya i completely understand that we have to pic general topics, i do, and i generally can keep em going and get along great. the problem is i lost all my friends back in the day and now i just feel like when i meet new people or whatever its just not the same, i feel extremely alienated. even when i get invited out it sounds so **** fun, but at the last moment i always end up just wanting to stay in. and i spend a ton of my time with my son which i know is great and fine but i miss socializing. its mostly my own problem. thats why im on here, kinda easier to open up or talk to people to me. thank you for your response i really appreciate it.

Whenever I need to connect with people, I often seek out forums or places like this tied directly to the things that interest me. In addition, libraries offer classes or discussions related to a myriad of topics that you could attend for free or even better teach one. I am confident that your depth of knowledge in your interest is inspiring. You have to link up with people who like what you like and enjoy what you enjoy. There are just too many people on this planet that there is no one else out there like you.

I used to try to change to make others like me but ended up feeling like a phony. Then one day I heard this quote and it changed me: "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." Dr. Seues

Don't be anyone but yourself and the right people will come along.

Get out there and find your group of friends and don't let the few people that don't fit stop you from looking.

Brandog209 said:

I feel like everyone looks at me funny because when i was lonely i kinda found myself and realized that one thing that makes me extremely happy in life is science! i read constantly about the universe and paranormal type stuff and i feel like when i talk about that to anyone they just think im stupid and look at me wierd. its very discouraging.

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Define paranormal.

I know the feeling. I love technology and geek culture, but it's hard to find people who really love to engage in a talk about these things and find them stimulating to think about. I used to poke around communities for making online friends in the hopes of finding other nerds, but most people wanted silly, casual chat and shied away from longer, more in-depth messages even if they said they felt the same.

One approach is to read content like blogs or Reddit where people create their own posts and articles. Find a decent community, and there's a lot of back-and-forth to read even if you're not a participant and it's more personable than a book. I also wound up talking a lot to my instructors when I was taking classes, too, and they'd tell me interesting stories about how they worked as an electrician or an auto mechanic when they were younger. I don't mind small talk, but after the 12th conversation about what you're making for dinner it becomes mind-numbing and hard to differentiate between personalities. Like everyone's just come out of a cookie-cutter mold where the only differences are the color of their hair or the names of their kids.