how to become positive?

i did some reassessing of myself and noticed that im negative to the core. im just tired of being sarcastic and negative all the time, i wanna be positive but how does one become positive is the question? nothing really motivates me, i dont really look forward to anything but i know this positivity thing will somewhat help with my depression and how i see life maybe from a different angle but how does one become positive?

Focus on the good. What good things are in your life? Friends, family, hobbies, good grades, anything that you enjoy, that you have or that you can lean on is a good thing. Focus on that instead of the bad. Everyone has something good in their life, they may not want to realize it or see it, but they do. Make a gratitude list of all the things you are grateful for. Volunteer and help the less fortunate. Do something good.

Easier said than done Callie.

dn560 asks a good question and I've put it to myself and another member asked something almost like it a few days ago.

When my whole outlook is bleak and it seems like all I can see, feel and think is how grim and cheerless everything is, how does one actually turn it around? Even just a little bit?

The closest I've come to an answer is to work at some logistical type tasks to fill up the time. Charming eh? Work as an alternative to happiness. But one can achieve some kind of accomplishment.....do it enough and it might make a difference in self image. Haven't really got there yet, not enough to say that I made it to positive.

constant stranger said:

Easier said than done Callie.

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Most of what I say is easier said than done. But, honestly, the best things are rarely easy to come by. Things might be hard to accomplish, but if one doesn't try, it unlikely one will succeed.

One thing i'm noticing is to break out of your normal routine. I had to do that by a break up but what happened happened you know. Today was an especially dark day but I know if I keep it up i'll only make things worse for myself and end up in a panic attack or something. So to break out of this routine I will try to fill my days off work with fun activities like working out and reading and writing on ALL! anything that can help make me a better person versus being a little black rain cloud lol.

They always say it's good to force yourself to get out of your comfort zone. Similarly, when one is feeling depressed and down, it is very challenging to even feel motivated to do anything and one gets very "comfortable" in that state of misery or depression or just simply negativity. With me, what works is to force myself to do things. Even if they keep failing and I still end up feeling the same, at least I know I tried.

I think I'm kinda experiencing a bit of this the past few days but I refuse to say I'm depressed if this is truly the case. I'd like to say that it's just one of those down phases. I usually just ride it out, let myself go through it but at the same time try to watch out that I don't overstay in this position for too long? So I try to find things to do that I'd normally feel good with. Gaming, watching funny videos, watching a series, watch a movie, take a walk... I tried these yesterday and I only managed to do each of them for less than.. 15 mins? It was hard, to make yourself do something you're not motivated to do and wanting to just mope around. Not to mention the restlessness that could come along with it, it's all a bad combo if you ask me.

At the same time, you'd tend to like have all these negative thoughts and negative talk in your head, talking you down or discouraging you. I try my best to block these out by keeping occupied. There really is no other way to me. If you're already unmotivated to do things, and you have all these thoughts in your head - that's a full recipe for disaster. When I get sucked into negativity, I always feel badly afterwards, especially if my behaviour was affecting people around me. I always use this to remind myself not to get sucked in - although sometimes, I'm just not strong enough to keep to this.

So, as difficult as it sounds... make yourself do something and keep trying to do something until you settle with one thing that keeps your attention long enough. I know I struggled a little yesterday, and I think I still am (which is probably why this post is so long now), so it's really normal to feel this way. But good luck trying, I hope you'll manage to be a little bit more positive soon.

Repress negative thoughts. When thinking something try to remove any strongly subjective impressions you have and think as objectively as you can.

Works to a degree, for me.

Edit: also as many said, try and find something to keep your mind occupied. But I suggest you don't completely ignore problems, if there are, and try to deal with them one at a time, one step at a time. It may take a long time but that's ok. Don't hurry and get too much out of your comfort zone as that may have the opposite effect but do try.

If everything around you seems negative and pointless, then it's impossible to become positive just like that. You'll have to change slowly.

I would try something like this. If positivity doesn't exist for you, then work with different levels of negativity, and go for the lesser evil. (like, it sucks to go for a walk for 30 minutes, but it's better than staying at home the entire day)

And realize that excess negativity is wasteful. Be negative towards negativity. For example, if you discover you're sarcastic, stop it.

Having once been a completely negative and sarcastic person myself, I do know its possible to change. Perhaps not to become quite as positive as we'd like but I do think that once you make that mental shift, even if life doesnt actually change for the better, you feel tonnes better.

I think firstly, its important to acknowledge that its going to take a long time and a lot of effort and an epic number of failed attempts. But you've got to stick with it. I cannot put into words how worth it it will be.

For me, it started with me forcing myself to focus on the positive. I would take 5 minutes several times throughout the day to be grateful for the good stuff. And then I started visualizing positive stuff happening.

Changing my diet, sleeping patterns and exercising more also helped loads. It kept my moods balanced and made it easier to feel optimistic.

Something else that really got me out of my rut was volunteering. Dealing with the less fortunate constantly reminded me that I had it great.

I hope this helps. Dont give up!

It's a combination of habit, bias, and expectation you have to overcome. Our brains are wired to be negative, or at least remember negative things, as a defence mechanism. Although while people develop differently early on, personal experience can have an effect on how you think. Hence why a person who's had a lot of bad experiences tends to me more negative than a person who hasn't.

If you want to be more positive you probably have to change the way you think. Everyone goes through some honeysuckle sometime and it's how you approach and tackle these things that makes the difference. But like anything that's good - it normally takes effort. The power of the mind is often underestimated and I believe everyone has the power to change things like this.

dn560 said:

i did some reassessing of myself and noticed that im negative to the core. im just tired of being sarcastic and negative all the time, i wanna be positive but how does one become positive is the question? nothing really motivates me, i dont really look forward to anything but i know this positivity thing will somewhat help with my depression and how i see life maybe from a different angle but how does one become positive?

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That's the million dollar question. I'm wondering that myself.

I downloaded an app on my phone...actually paid for the full version because I am that desperate to be positive. You do have to focus on the good. Only talk to other people about the good. Write down the negative bad thoughts and throw them away. I actually started meditating for 2 mins before my worst class of the day at school, and it has done wonders.

I got these ideas from my app, it is helping a little bit.

Jafo said:

dn560 said:

i did some reassessing of myself and noticed that im negative to the core. im just tired of being sarcastic and negative all the time, i wanna be positive but how does one become positive is the question? nothing really motivates me, i dont really look forward to anything but i know this positivity thing will somewhat help with my depression and how i see life maybe from a different angle but how does one become positive?

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That's the million dollar question. I'm wondering that myself.

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ikr

Try to ignore negativity. It's usually only a problem if you make it one, much like anything else. I swear, way too many people concentrate on the stupidity in life. It seems like a lot of people are quick to point out all the bad and negativity in things, wanting to bring it to light and say how wrong it is that someone did or said something they disagree with. It's easier to be negative than to just ignore something that irks you though.