Brutal loneliness

I feel so alone and hopeless that my chest feels heavy, I cry unbearably, the pain is just so intense. It feels like I am falling off a cliff. That's how bad this loneliness feels, because no one seems to understand or care.

We are here. We care lilE.

lilE said:

I feel so alone and hopeless that my chest feels heavy, I cry unbearably, the pain is just so intense. It feels like I am falling off a cliff. That's how bad this loneliness feels, because no one seems to understand or care.

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I understand. I feel the same way.

i an otaly relate, it is a very crushing feeling. Here if you want to chat

I also identify with you and am here for you.

We do care.. I do care. You gotta see that and let us hear you out. As you can even see there are some who can relate to how you feel already. Sometimes it helps to just talk about stuff to people who can relate. Lightens up the load weighing down on your shoulders.

delledonne11 said:

We are here. We care lilE.

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and we totally understand...

Indeed, we all care. I haven't been brought to tears due to loneliness, but I'm sure it'll get like that since it's unlikely to stop.

I do get it though, it's like a dark cloud following one around, or a weight on one's shoulders. Not good. Maybe find someone to talk to? Eat some ice cream? Eating ice cream always makes me feel better, strangely.

As others have said, we do care. *hugs*

Loneliness does feel really devastating... It slowly tears apart every last hope from you. The feeling of being alone in the loneliness, that no one understands. It's this huge draining feeling of emptiness. It makes you feel forgotten, neglected, invisible, unworthy, lost, pathetic, frustrated, depressed, gloomy etc. I feel really lonely even if people care, but the reason for that is, that the only people who care are online. Even if there are many caring people online, who are ready to listen or talk, it's never same thing as real world where you can talk face to face or get/give a real hug. Of course everyone of us are real, even if it's online or not, but it's not as real as real life.

Thanks guys, I appreciate your replies. I just been lonely for so many years, I feel dead. I wish I could go back to being a kid in elementary school, I was human then.

When do you think this began?

When I was around 18 and forward. I am 28 now.

It's a particular lonely night tonight, depressed and a little anxious. I need to change my ways. I still can't get over my two best friends that i lost two years ago, I miss them so much. I just sit here or lay crying...I could cry for an eternity.

Im so sorry to hear about your 2 friends. Take all the time you need to cry, sometimes i think crying can be healing

Thanks mermaid. Crying is all I can do sometimes, I am paralyzed by the intense emotions that I just start crying and can't stop.

At least we have the internet and forums like this.
Before the days of the internet in the 1980's I would feel very lonely.

lilE said:

It's a particular lonely night tonight, depressed and a little anxious. I need to change my ways. I still can't get over my two best friends that i lost two years ago, I miss them so much. I just sit here or lay crying...I could cry for an eternity.

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If you don't mind my asking, how did you lose them?
And also, did this depression start when you lost them, or was losing them something that just made the depression worse?

If you don't want to talk about it right now that's fine. Go at your own pace.

Either way I'm glad you're finally opening up a bit, lilE. It is good for you. No one can keep everything bottled up inside forever. If you do this then eventually you explode. And that can get very ugly sometimes. Talking about things helps. Letting yourself cry helps, too. Just allowing yourself to feel the emotions and experiences and just get them out helps. Writing, drawing, painting, anything like that to get it out helps.

Suppressing your feelings only makes things harder on you.