The last 4 years my life have been dictated by my fear of people to the extent of never really leaving my house throughout that whole time. I kind of expected that I would leave my house some day and be fine and would be able to fit in with everyone. How wrong I was.

When im in public i am a complete and utter wreck. I cant stop shaking, I go from too much eye contact to too little and people seem to look at me like im repugnant.

Sometimes I would not even open my mouth, to talking non-stop BS and not being able to say the right words out.

That is probably the worst thing of it all - "the look". The way people look at you - like youre retarded, like youre a screwball - its devestating because I never used to experience this when I was alot younger. It makes me want to explode.

In the end nearly all of my social outings end in disappointment and more regrets.

Is it a confidence problem?Or do you just feel very uncomfortable interacting with people? I experience that ocassionally, Eye contact suddenly becomes creepy etc? Trying to be funny when you shouldnt be, or others not getting your humor?

Ouch, that sounds very rough for you. I don't have social phobia but I do have a fear of people and I never go out. I've done a little reading into the subject, have you tried Cognitive Behavioural Therapy? Apparently it will slowly "reprogram" your way of thinking so that you no longer have irrational fears of people. I've downloaded an old recording about Overcoming Social Anxiety, I don't reckon its going to solve it, but the advice and reassurance it gives is very useful in stressful times.

If any of you are anything like me. I'm sure you've analyzed the shit out of your anxiety problem. So, what have you concluded about your social anxiety?

I've concluded that..

I have a low self-esteem
I have low confidence
I think negative about almost all social situations
I fear any contact with people (except on my high days)
I can't communicate with people (strangers, family, friends) without worrying
I over analyze everything
I find it easy to talk about things that are "deep"
I find it difficult to talk about things that are not deep
I am very self-conscious
I think people don't really want me around
I think people regret asking for my company
I think I push people away, the more I talk
The more I talk, the more I worry about saying wrong
I question the things I say (am I lying, am I being ignorant)
I worry about whether or not I hurt someones feelings
I think people say they are okay, after I say something, but really they're not.
I don't believe people the first time they say something, or the 2nd or 3rd or 4th...
I constantly ask for reassurance
I understand things the first time, but I ask 300 million times.
I don't stop asking for reassurance until they say it and it sounds "right"
I get very nervous (sometimes)
I think people can feel this magical vibe coming off me and it's telling them all my secrets
I am very nervous about opening up, truly, to people in case they tell other people.
I think once people get to know me, they want to take back things they've said to me, because they don't like me anymore.
I worry about silences, when talking
I worry about not having anything to say

...uhh I could continue but it's getting boring. LOL!

I've concluded that
I have a fear of being seen
Uniforms ease me somewhat as I can hide behind them
I can't walk near people without becoming really concious of everything (even how I'm walking)
I feel stupid in front of people unless I'm doing something with a purpose.
I suck at "small talk"
I hide behind lies a lot also, this is one of the few places I will not lie about myself
When I do come out of my shell I over do it to try and compensate so end up too loud and brash, so people dislike me

But those are all just observations. My current hypothesis is that:
-I have a fear of judgement

However I'm having a hard time understanding where that comes from, my father left my mum but I don't remember ever thinking that that was my fault. My mother is not a very judgemental person

If in doubt: Blame it on yout hormones.

I also think its to do with the amount of social exposure like how often do you go out, whats your social life like? I think that my lack of social experiences during my early teens is the key to why I am shy when it comes to meeting new people. My high school weekends would consists of homework and friday and saturday nights at the T.V. School holidays were alot worse, were I would stay at home for days in a row. Its probably to do with the fact that my parents were strict about me going to b-day parties and sleep overs back then. Now I can do almost whatever I want.

Im just starting to realise that If Im gonna get better in this life and beat my shyness and learn new things I have to take as much as I can in this life and try to live my life to the full. I do try to go out at least once or twice a week or two like go to the movies, a concert or a sporting event.

Havent been out to a pub or a night club for nearly 3 months now. My meds are preventing me from not drinking

Apparently we are all over critical. I guess the cure would be to have as much fun as we can with other people and even though we might turn some of them off, the ones that stick around would be worth keeping. As for the symptoms...yeah a lot of those ring bells. I also found it easier to warm up to people who are extremely talkative and energetic....I'd best describe them as "jolly."

Same here. Most of the times people look at me as if i am retarded. I don't know it if its my brain playing tricks or I am really retarded looking....lol i reckon it is the later.