(I'm new on this forum, so I keep having these long introductions. I'm sorry)

I moved away from home, to a new city and a new country. I am working towards a masters degree.
And I have no friends here.
I had many friends before, in school. When I travelled abroad, I made friends quite easily. I think I'm quite a nice person and that my social skills aren't that bad.
It's just here, in the city where I chose to live, that it's just not working out.
The university where I attend my classes is huge and it's incredibly hard to connect to people.
I listened to all the different advice (join clubs, find activities), and it's really good advice - but for me it didn't help.
I took classes in foreign languages and aerobics, I joined a book club, and an expats community, and a club at my university - and although I spent a few nice evenings, I only made a few acquaintances, no friendships emerged.
I'm really at my wits' end, I don't know what to do anymore. All this only managed to ruin my self-confidence, I feel boring, stupid and unworthy of love.

You're not boring, stupid and unworthy of love. From what i've read above, you don't sound boring or stupid at all to me. And everyone, in my opinion, is worthy to love and be loved. Okay so best advice doesn't seem to work..so maybe you just need to give more time? You don't know when someone might just come along and be your friend or your next best friend. From what you've said about yourself, i don't think it's impossible. You just need more time to mingle with more people i guess.

At the risk of sounding trite...you sound like...you just flat don't like it there. My sister spent a year in Poland, going to school. She just didn't like it...fine while it lasted, glad it was over..you sound like that. It happens. Plus, masters' programs in themselve, I can see how that in itself could turn into a rut before it's completed. (not sayin' it is, but school gets does get old sometimes). You're still the same person you were when you went there.

mink, thank you for the support and your kind words. I'm not giving up, but it's really not easy...

cosmic kid, the program is actually really good, and it's a big chance for me. so, I couldn't just give it up and go home (with my tail between my legs). I guess I just have to stick it out, deal with the loneliness and see what happens afterwards (i.e. where the job hunt will take me).

Yup, it is never easy and never will be. Just keep living life

Jamie, I got all of that...Of course you would'n't/couldn't just up and quit! (you must think this guy really is some kind of well-intentioned idiort!ll LOL) That's my (I see now) poorly made point jamie! I't's temprary. THAT's the reason to NOT quit. Good luck to you jamie

Oh! I know where you got that. My sister's stay for one year in poland? Well, that was just a one year part requirement, of a bigger 5 year design degree she got here in the marble capital of the world! No, she didnt quit, she just didn't like parts of that year, but she didn't quit...she got her degree. that's called success. BTW...I don't believe I ever said that I you should quit. Nor did I say I believed you should quit.

This post was last modified: 11-04-2007 04:59 PM by Cosmic Kid.

cosmic, sorry, of course you never said I should quit - and I see now the point you were trying to make.
I jumped to the wrong conclusion, you know: "I don't like it here" --> "I don't have to be here".
And the funny thing is, actually I kinda like it here. I mean, I like everything else, the city, the program, the general niceness of people ... It's just tome funny twist of fate or whatever that I'm not succeeding in the "finding friends" department.
I'm just a bit frustrated, because I set out to make a life for myself here, not just to get a masters degree and then go home, I really planned to stay here.
But you're right, this program will end, and my life will change afterwards, that's for sure (wherever I end up working). Hopefully that change will affect the "friendlessness" as well.

Anyway, I'm sorry for the misunderstanding, and thank you for the comforting words

I can respect and relate wholeheartedly to what you are saying, jamie, and I hope that you find someone to ease that emptiness of yours soon. I understand that even practicing the most sound & logical life-advice in the world over and over again can't fill that void that loneliness gives to you, even when you try to see loneliness as a "state of mind".

It's all linked to acceptance and frustration, and I'm talking from plenty of personal experience. It's hard to make friends in such a detached society. Think about it: The very devices that were intended to connect us all together (mobile phones, internet etc.) have driven us all apart. We spend our days chatting on the internet, or texting on the phone as opposed to keeping our social skills maintained by communicating in person on a regular basis. Things spiral downward from there, but I won't go into that.

I know it's a bit of a twist with me writing the above statement as a reply in an internet forum, but my point still stands.

If you ever want to chat, feel free to drop me a private message. Good luck with your future.