what do you think the problem is? What do you think needs to change before your situation can change?

Me/you, Us. You know what I mean? I really do not know the answer to that. If I did I probably would not be single.

I think to love someone you have to let your gourd down and for some that might be a problem. I mean I would not say I am the sort of person that could fall in love with a person just cos I meet her 1 or 2 times. I am the sort of person that has to know her for a long time. maybe am to picky. I don't know.

I'm gonna preface this by saying I'm a cynical bastard, so feel free to disregard whatever I say.

In my experience (and this was true for me before I became a cynical bastard) people like to put love up on a pedestal. They like to think of it as a kind of sheer joy that fills up your soul, as if your heart was laughing.

This is what keeps people from finding it. They're convinced it will happen all at once, as though they meet someone and they have to constantly search for some kind of connection. Most of these people will find nothing.

Love creeps up on you, and grabs you in its grips before you know it. If you're waiting for it, it will not show. You have to go forth assuming it will come eventually but never expecting it to come on time, because if you expect it, you'll usually force yourself into a relationship that will burn out quickly. Love is that evanescent, perfectly bloomed rose; you cannot will it to grow- you must chance upon the right weather.


In other words, fuck as much people as you can without intentions and sooner or later you should fall for someone. (I told you I was a cynical bastard.)

Actually the middle of that was very well put I thought and not at all cynical.

I think you are probably right in that it dose creep up on you then you don't realise you was in love tell its gone again. Maybe we should learn to appreciate things moor when we have them?

I do know that it may be a very long time- years-before I will be able to actively seek a relationship. Right now my 16 yr old, college, work, and advancement are my priorities.

I get very lonely sometimes but, I know it's my choice. When I am ready to give what I desire from another, then I will be available.

I thought so also.

Well, apparently I need to change into a fat beer swilling idiot with a John Deere hat, an obsession with football and a tendency to drool on myself to gain any attention from the women in my local area.

Based on my observations, the women around me are turned off by men who use proper grammar, stay in shape and actually care about the well being of their partner.

So, I guess I'll just knock a couple of my teeth out, gain a hundred pounds and become a misogynist son of a bitch. That should please the ladies. Now if you'll excuse me I have naked lady mud flaps and a wife beater to purchase.

The problem is that I'm too much of a coward to tell a woman what I really feel about her. I'm too scared of rejection. And even if I got to date a woman, I got absolutely no experience with that sort of stuff, so I would just feel like a total failure all the time. I really wish that I could find someone who's as inexperienced as me. We wouldn't have to feel any pressure, and we could laugh together. But how do you find such a person?

Maybe one day I'll meet a woman that I feel so strong for that I'll HAVE to tell her. Until then, I don't really know what to do. Just being myself. Why can't that be enough?

I haven't got to that stage just yet ............ still to go through the dating scene ecetera. At this point of time in my life I've decided to keep optimistic, my previous partner of 10 years came out of the blue when I wasn't looking so I've decided if that can happen it can happen again. Have a few back up plans if nothing arises from the dating websites so that should do for now.

bahahaha oh man...wipes tears from eyes (tears of laughter)

No, no, I know what you mean, and I agree. I think ultilmately we have to be stable and content within ourselves first, before you can really love somone else. My motto is..uh motto? I mean philosophy... just continue to do and seek what makes you happy and be as honest with yourself as possible...when it is right and you are ready someone will come along. Worrying about it will only force you into wrong situations.

And lol Z...crackhead is a mood? naw man...its a lifestyle