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Hello in London,
How great it is to talk to you.
Well, what is the point of a lonely life? It has the same point as a non-lonely life. Life is, I believe, a privilege, an opportunity, etc. Sometimes I just think of not living and what I will miss, mainly the morning. The dead have ceased to experience this life. They may have enjoyed it or it may have been a torture. Either way, there is always something about life that I will miss so why not appreciate what I enjoy, because it won't last long.
I can empathize with you. Have you seen the movie, "Holiday in Venice" or some such title, with Katheryn Hepburn. She is talking to a group of people at her hotel in Venice shortly after arriving. One-by-one they drift off to some destination and although they ask her to come along she replies that she will just stay there and appreciate the scenery. But soon she is alone. She looks slowly around. It is quiet. There is no one around.  I have felt that. Everyone else is rushing off in groups and there I am, alone. I have been deserted, abandoned. No one cares about me. I am not in demand, or they just don't think. Nonetheless, I am odd-man-out. Nothing else to do but go to my room and get ready for bed.
The class is over and everyone scurries off. Church is over and groups form and begin chatting; laughing, and I am abandoned. It was OK when the program, class, lecture, play, etc. was in-progress and we were all together but now it is over and the group is dissolving and I have been deserted.
That's what it's like to me.

"But be of good cheer, I have overcome the world."...Jesus

Charles













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I am sorry to hear that you have been hurt by this one very crucial event. You feel that it is just not worth the risk of being hurt. So many things can go wrong. It is safer to just give up and retreat to when it was not risky. You may have not been happy then but atleast you were not hurt.
Lonliness is real. It is a human emotion that everyone experiences. Sometimes we are alon but sometimes we are lonely, which does not depend on how many people are around. Have you heard the expression, "lonely in a crowd?" That is the worst kind of lonliness. Everyone else has someone to be with it seems. People who appear to be single are shortly joined by a companion. There is a person with no one. You are attracted buit how will you approach him/her? What if she/he is waiting for someone? So, you just don't act, when that person might at least talk to you. Most people are shy. But you think it is you alone who are shy. What is the matter with me,you say.
Go ahead. Take a chance. What is thw WORST that could happen? She/he might say "get lost you jerk!" Call the cops, it's a stalker! OK, you feelings are hurt but you can't be arrested. She probably won't hit you. No, it will be a polite but cold answer. But, maybe you can start a conversation. What is worse: lonliness or rejection? And how can he/she be rejecting you when he/she dos not know anything about you?
Easy? No, but what is the alternative? More of the same. We do not ease our minds by sweeping our emotions under the rug. They stay there until an opportune moment and they come out.

God loves you. When you know that then everything else is "[/color]frosting on the cake."








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