I am what I like to think is a sociable person. But for some reason I am friendless. I go out to the bookstores, to the gym, and even to neighborhood bars. I have given my # to those who I thought might be interested in hanging out... Yet still no one has called... And I will go out and some times see those very people whom I have given my # too, out there alone...

Can anyone give me a clue as to what the hell is going on here? I am just flabbergasted! I don't understand what is going on at all!
It just seems no one wants to connect anymore...
I need some opinions on this...

Thanks

Red :-)

People are afraid to get too close to anyone else i have noticed this
too luckily I've ran into people like me and we hang out.

Or their possibly to embarrassed to call you to hang out there could be a thousand reasons.

Thanks for the response Hijacc, good point, getting close scares people. It really does... I just wonder why the fear of sharing and being yourself is so difficult for people... thanks again

Because people are scared of the reaction they might get from people if they put themselves out like that. And they assume that they'll get a bad reaction. And be rejected.

I agree with the other two ppl on this.

I think the trick is, is too try and get friends with them but at the same time not come across to eager if you get me.

If you approach it with a relaxed attitude it might make them moor inclined to be friendly. How you show that you wont to be friends but not be to friendly is behind me but that's kinder how I see it. Sometimes when a person come across as to strong it can scare ppl off.

To be honest I think your problem here is a u-neek one as every one I know has like a thousand friends that they seem to care lots about. Just I do not. And of course the ppl that come here normally do not all for different reasons though.

I have seen the same thing dude, sometimes i try to be friendly and theyre also friendly but its like they dont wanna go any further than the acquaintance, its kinda weird, but life is weird.

Its even weirder when u dont have a couple of friends or a group of friends to hang out with... it sux... its like every1 has their friends and pals to go to places with and do stuff but you....it really sux....

well i never call people when they give me their number because i see as more of a kind gesture and too only call if i really need something
maybe ask for their number so you can call them

Hey man, I wish I could be confident enough to give or get a number

Here's my 2 cents: I may give my number to someone, even want to hang out but often i don't cos I'm so nervous, especially if i'm going to have to face awkward silences... I find it's best, on both sides, if you make a low intensity excuse to meet up, like it's not just the 2 of you, or there's an obvious goal (like playing a game or watching a movie or something)...

Well, I can tell you why I don't.

From my experience most people try to put on some kind of show for other people to get their attention. It's like some kind of game that really only is worth playing if one is an extrovert.

For me, I'm a much more introverted person. I can only connect with someone if the interaction truly feels like something much more real and honest. Then I feel like they have a genuine interest in me and I can have a genuine appreciation, respect, and thus interest and sense of security in this person's character as well.

For me, the above is so very pertinent to have a meaningful interaction with another person. Otherwise, I feel I am just gaining acquaintances that will stab me in the back, so to speak, if it would help them since they, in essence, are just faking a connection or just creating a superficial connection with me.

Also, I get misunderstood by most people, so connecting is very hard for me and tiresome having to go through so much negative energy. Generally, I just feel I want most people to leave me alone...

And I'd imagine that the extroverts that are hurt too often by these fake connections they make become detached as well from wanting to make a connection with people since it usually fails for them. But I'm not a psychologist so I can only only generally speculate with this thought.

This post was last modified: 06-26-2008 02:18 AM by Anonymous.