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If he won't voice chat on Skype or talk on the phone, I think you should just consider him an online pal and forget about meeting.
... He's too scared to Skype or give you a current photo, but he'll fly two people - one a stranger - out to see him in person?

Has he ever made a request that seems off to you, and do you know what Catfishing is? I hate to be that person, but I think it's better safe than sorry.
I tried a couple over the years, and only met one woman that was in 1995.... It didn't work out

Then last year I answered a ad in the local paper, for a woman that just wanted some company....

I will never do that again... That was a Nightmare, I could write a Horror Novel about.

And what is it with all the dating sites on this site ??? I find that absolute cruelty ...What the Hell !! Especially the Asian one... She's freaking HOT !! But would I ever get that ?? Hell NO !!

Oh that really helps my loneliness !! It makes me want to join a web site Forum just for lonely people !!

I tried a couple over the years, and only met one woman that was in 1995.... It didn't work out

Then last year I answered a ad in the local paper, for a woman that just wanted some company....

I will never do that again... That was a Nightmare, I could write a Horror Novel about.

And what is it with all the dating sites on this site ??? I find that absolute cruelty ...What the Hell !! Especially the Asian one... She's freaking HOT !! But would I ever get that ?? Hell NO !!

Oh that really helps my loneliness !! It makes me want to join a web site Forum just for lonely people, because it makes me feel ALIENATED !!
I've been on and off of okcupid for over two years and have nothing to show for it. Only one girl ever actually responded to any real extent, and she ended up abruptly cutting contact after several emails and never said why.
I didn't have much luck with online dating when I tried it, but that was years ago. I might eventually try it again if I can put other things right first. One thing you should do: Before you agree to meet someone you know only online, get his real name first. First middle & last names if possible. Once you have his name,

Run a background check.

Seriously. It's not paranoia, but being savvy. As a single woman, you are inherently vulnerable to some extent. Even this guy's agreeing to fly your brother out to see that pro wrestling tournament is no guarantee. The guy might have someone else working with him; obviously you wouldn't know that until it's too late. He might be Mr. Wonderful...but get that name & run that background check. It only costs a small fee; Intelius can do a great job, that's the service I use. Better to be safe than sorry.[/size]
(08-08-2013, 07:16 AM)Fluffy Wrote: [ -> ]We both agree that we should video chatt upon meeting. A co worker told me to tell him, even if it's just to turn on the camera and say a quick hi and bye. He won't even do that.

Hmm?

(08-08-2013, 11:09 AM)Coeur Wrote: [ -> ]... He's too scared to Skype or give you a current photo, but he'll fly two people - one a stranger - out to see him in person?

This was what I was thinking. Even though you may not judge him for not wanting to do that (he may have some valid reasons), but it is still questionable especially if you are thinking of going the romantic way on things with him. If it's just a friend, it wouldn't matter so much. But if this is a potential person you are going to date.... then I dunno, sounds fishy.

What are his reasons, again?
I feel bad saying this to you but sometimes it's best to face up to things. If he refuses to let you hear his voice or even see one up to date photo, then he is not genuine. You read about situations like this all the time and I have been through it myself too. If he is living any sort of life and is talking about meeting, then he is certainly able to send a photo and speak to you. I would be a lot more than suspicious I'm afraid.
(08-08-2013, 11:09 AM)Coeur Wrote: [ -> ]... He's too scared to Skype or give you a current photo, but he'll fly two people - one a stranger - out to see him in person?

Has he ever made a request that seems off to you, and do you know what Catfishing is? I hate to be that person, but I think it's better safe than sorry.

yes I have heard of catfish. Even did the photo search, lol. Everything turn out the same. I even asked him not to catfish me.

(08-08-2013, 04:03 PM)ladyforsaken Wrote: [ -> ][quote

This was what I was thinking. Even though you may not judge him for not wanting to do that (he may have some valid reasons), but it is still questionable especially if you are thinking of going the romantic way on things with him. If it's just a friend, it wouldn't matter so much. But if this is a potential person you are going to date.... then I dunno, sounds fishy.

What are his reasons, again?

Reason on current photo? He says he's not a fan of taking pictures of himself. But in groups. For not Skype he's scare that he would stutter and he would rather do that in person.

(08-08-2013, 08:26 AM)will normal Wrote: [ -> ]
(08-08-2013, 07:16 AM)Fluffy Wrote: [ -> ]And if he doesn't want to exchange numbers or doesn't reply, just let him be?

If he doesn't reply, then that would be a problem. As far as not wanting to exchange numbers, hmm.....I don't know. I actually hit a road block on that. Even if one doesn't do video chat, I think at least a verbal conversation whether it be by phone or even by skype without turning on video (or another IM program that allows VOIP) is a great way of breaking the textual wall and letting things slowly progress.

Also, it's good to know you don't judge. It means you have an open mind and an open heart and that's important for any relationship and friendship in my eyes. As long as he doesn't hurt you in any way, shape, or form, you're in good hands.


I'm just really scare of what his response would be.if I asked to exchange numbers. Or V.O.I.P. He already knows if heart me my family would go after him. lol. He knows that I was overprotective.
I don't like online dating. It never worked for me, but then again, I should give it a chance again.
His excuses are making me more uncomfortable than I was in the first place. If I was going to drag somebody onto a plane to see me, I'd want to be sure everybody was totally comfortable and confident about making this step. The fact that he's making excuses instead of being reassuring is really not good.
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