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CenotaphGirl

Under the dirt, that’s my home ⚰️
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Ugh my ex moved on, it's so hard... it is so bloody hard
He broke up with me after he put me in hospital, he left me in the hospital heart broken,
I was suicidal at the time, I got transferred to a mental health unit... 3 weeks later I was out.
He still looks after me in some ways, picks me up after work, comes over whenever I ask.

Now he's with her....like officially
I wanna explode, I cant handle seeing him with her, it actually makes me feel nuts with jealousy.
I texted him this long message about his daughter (not my biological child) and blah blah,
He texted me back only about his daughter, like nothing to do with us...
I just boldly said "oh, dont miss me then?" He put "what are you trying to do here?"
I felt like responding to that would make me look weak...So I didn't.
I called his brother instead and asked him if he misses me lol (nuts with jealousy)
and his brother was like yeah he still misses you,

That has settled me, but I feel so annoyed with myself.
Annoyed that I still care, annoyed that im still the same when it comes to him.
His brother has been texting me that this new girl is nothing like me, and nothing I have to worry about
I feel so toxic, I know I cant be with him so why cant I just be happy for him?

My ex said he will always be there, pick me up whenever, come over whenever but he's with her,
and I have to accept it....
Life is laughing at me, no matter what I do, I will never be happy...
I'm ill at the moment, but I asked him to come over at 11:00 am, I don't even know what im gonna say...
I wanna say that I don't want him to be with her, but I cant even think of a good reason why...
I've been up all night acting out our convo which is now only 4 ish hours away, so excuse the venting...
 
Why hold onto somebody who doesn't want you. It's only punishment from yourself. Whatever you two had, is gone. Even if he came back, begging, that thing is still gone. You never get it back. Occasional moments might flicker, memories might seem warm and comforting. But the truth, the bitter truth, is it wasn't meant to be. Dwelling upon will only eventually turn those memories into cold dark moments. It will push you further away from other goals and self forefillment.

one of life's bitter pills, so get chomping!
 
Why hold onto somebody who doesn't want you. It's only punishment from yourself. Whatever you two had, is gone. Even if he came back, begging, that thing is still gone. You never get it back. Occasional moments might flicker, memories might seem warm and comforting. But the truth, the bitter truth, is it wasn't meant to be. Dwelling upon will only eventually turn those memories into cold dark moments. It will push you further away from other goals and self forefillment.

one of life's bitter pills, so get chomping!
I have no idea how to be okay with him being with her, wish they made a tablet to lose memories.
 
That's why most people break up, go their separate ways, and stay away from each other. Time away softens the misery. But, keeping in contact keeps the painful feelings alive. Finding someone new, even just as a friend, also helps with the painful feelings.
 
Sorry about what you're going through. Being broken up with just sucks. I've been through it enough to know. All of my relationships, except for my current one, have ended with the other person running off with someone else. It hurts badly and the pain can at times become tangible.

I know this will sound strange, counter-intuitive and "easier said than done," but the best thing you can do at this point is to get some distance from him. Stay away for a while, find some friends to hang around with, the more you see him right now the longer your pain will likely last.

Also, grieving is a good thing. Grieving will lead to healing. Allow yourself to cry, get angry and sad. It's perfectly natural. You have every right to grieve right now, so allow yourself that. You haven't failed as a person, you had a relationship end. There is far more to you than that relationship. Try to remember that.

Though this may sound like an annoying cliché, you're still young and you will meet other people. But my best advice, for what it's worth, is to grieve the loss, keep your distance, and try to move on. That will come with time. Take care of yourself and let us know how you're doing!
 
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I have no idea how to be okay with him being with her, wish they made a tablet to lose memories.

We are disposable. We get discarded for something better. There's always something better. Such is life. It's very complicated. What can we do. In my case none of them even think about me. We are more distant than complete strangers. Like we don't even exist if we ever meet face to face again. It's something we have to accept and move on. Finding someone else may or may not help. I think it should but i can't speak from personal experience as i stopped looking long time ago. Main thing to remember there's no permanence in life.
 
We are disposable. We get discarded for something better. There's always something better. Such is life. It's very complicated. What can we do. In my case none of them even think about me. We are more distant than complete strangers. Like we don't even exist if we ever meet face to face again. It's something we have to accept and move on. Finding someone else may or may not help. I think it should but i can't speak from personal experience as i stopped looking long time ago. Main thing to remember there's no permanence in life.
But .... there are those bonded relationships, that last long. I have seen it, just never had it myself.
I mean, we're not a product to consume, we're humans.
There is something called love....just with the right person, that's the thing. Needs time to find it.
 
We are disposable. We get discarded for something better. There's always something better. Such is life. It's very complicated. What can we do. In my case none of them even think about me. We are more distant than complete strangers. Like we don't even exist if we ever meet face to face again. It's something we have to accept and move on. Finding someone else may or may not help. I think it should but i can't speak from personal experience as i stopped looking long time ago. Main thing to remember there's no permanence in life.
She's not better than me, she's just not, he is with her, because he knows it hurts me. I dont understand why two people in love have to hurt each other so bloody much. :cry:
 
She's not better than me, she's just not, he is with her, because he knows it hurts me. I dont understand why two people in love have to hurt each other so bloody much. :cry:
Strange. He gets involved with someone worse than you for one reason - to hurt you? That seems like a lot of trouble. Who does that. There are many easier ways to hurt someone. Why go through so much trouble.
 
Strange. He gets involved with someone worse than you for one reason - to hurt you? That seems like a lot of trouble. Who does that. There are many easier ways to hurt someone. Why go through so much trouble.
She's there, easy and she likes him, so he's doing it to hurt me, he tries to rub it in my face, I just wanna make him feel how I feel...but I won't, I'll just keep crying while he's happy pretending to love her more than me.
 
But .... there are those bonded relationships, that last long. I have seen it, just never had it myself.
I mean, we're not a product to consume, we're humans.
There is something called love....just with the right person, that's the thing. Needs time to find it.

Not in my case, not in the disgusting toxic environment where i am. Here everyone, especially men are disposable. To me certain things like being complete strangers after we shared with each other some period of our lives is not normal, but here it's their way of life. This is how they roll here. Love with the right person... if only such existed.
 
She's there, easy and she likes him, so he's doing it to hurt me, he tries to rub it in my face, I just wanna make him feel how I feel...but I won't, I'll just keep crying while he's happy pretending to love her more than me.

Could it be revenge? Did you do something to him? Maybe he knows he's disposable and he moved on? I don't know the whole story. One few night stands low quality female once told me she can stand on any corner and men will attach themselves to her. Which is true. Of course i had to distance myself immediately. As a woman all you have to do is exist. Do the same to him and forget him. If you get too attached nothing good will come out of it. I'm obsessed with the thought that someone close to me can ignore me like invisible garbage. My obsession doesn't do any good to me. I wish i could stand outside be a magnet and have women attach themselves to me so i can do something similar what i tell you to do but most men don't have such superpower here lol...
 
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Maybe he truly likes her, and your feelings aren't fully reciprocated so your anger has you in denial about the whole thing and lashing out at someone that you don't know. Even though you may not feel like it, maybe he feels like she is better suited for him. Maybe he's not rubbing it in your face, but setting boundaries and space between you two. I think that you're looking at it through hopeful optimism and rose colored eyes. You're jealous that he's with her, and feel like he should be with you. Why would you want someone like this in the first place if he's going back and forth between women and playing with both individual's emotions and feelings?
 
Could it be revenge? Did you do something to him? Maybe he knows he's disposable and he moved on? I don't know the whole story. One few night stands low quality female once told me she can stand on any corner and men will attach themselves to her. Which is true. Of course i had to distance myself immediately. As a woman all you have to do is exist. Do the same to him and forget him. If you get too attached nothing good will come out of it. I'm obsessed with the thought that someone close to me can ignore me like invisible garbage. My obsession doesn't do any good to me. I wish i could stand outside be a magnet and have women attach themselves to me so i can do something similar what i tell you to do but most men don't have such superpower here lol...

Uhm idk, maybe, not sure what I did to him, but it could be anything, he could have felt disrespected by something I said. He'd never say, just do something to hurt me. I love him, I have no care about other men... but that will always be the difference.

Maybe he truly likes her, and your feelings aren't fully reciprocated so your anger has you in denial about the whole thing and lashing out at someone that you don't know. Even though you may not feel like it, maybe he feels like she is better suited for him. Maybe he's not rubbing it in your face, but setting boundaries and space between you two. I think that you're looking at it through hopeful optimism and rose colored eyes. You're jealous that he's with her, and feel like he should be with you. Why would you want someone like this in the first place if he's going back and forth between women and playing with both individual's emotions and feelings?
Honestly, he is rubbing it in my face, he's acting like he's in love with her, when he's seriously not.

I'd never lash out on his ... bit of fun.. or whatever she's supposed to be, if I was trying to play his game, I'd start flirting with his best mate, but I won't, only because i'm tired. I'm so tired of all the games. She cant replace me because we are worlds a part, she's no one to him. If I need him and she needs him, I know he'd be here, with me. That's just the way it is.

I'd do anything for things to just get back to the beginning, it was me, him and his daughter, it was the first time/only time I felt like I had a family. We had so many issues, but we could have worked it out, I just don't know why we always have to hurt each other... we was perfect before all the drama, but it takes over.
 
Yeah, you are in denial. How do you know she's nothing to him? How do you know he's not happier with her than he was with you? Do you have solid evidence to support any of your claims?

Also, not to sound repetitive, why ON EARTH do you want to be with someone who'll just play games with your heart? Are you into that? Think for a god **** second and have some dignity. Respect yourself.
 
Uhm idk, maybe, not sure what I did to him, but it could be anything, he could have felt disrespected by something I said. He'd never say, just do something to hurt me. I love him, I have no care about other men... but that will always be the difference.


Honestly, he is rubbing it in my face, he's acting like he's in love with her, when he's seriously not.

I'd never lash out on his ... bit of fun.. or whatever she's supposed to be, if I was trying to play his game, I'd start flirting with his best mate, but I won't, only because i'm tired. I'm so tired of all the games. She cant replace me because we are worlds a part, she's no one to him. If I need him and she needs him, I know he'd be here, with me. That's just the way it is.

I'd do anything for things to just get back to the beginning, it was me, him and his daughter, it was the first time/only time I felt like I had a family. We had so many issues, but we could have worked it out, I just don't know why we always have to hurt each other... we was perfect before all the drama, but it takes over.

Why would you want to be with someone like that? Get him back? Is is even an option? if you had issues before you'll have issues again. May not be worth the trouble.
 
Yeah, you are in denial. How do you know she's nothing to him? How do you know he's not happier with her than he was with you? Do you have solid evidence to support any of your claims?

Also, not to sound repetitive, why ON EARTH do you want to be with someone who'll just play games with your heart? Are you into that? Think for a god **** second and have some dignity. Respect yourself.
Honestly, we just know each other very well, if he was really happy with her, he'd leave me alone, but he won't do that, we both know that he would never do that. If he left me alone, we'd never talk or meet again, im not a stalker or anything close, so if he is happy with her, why is he always trying to be with me?

I hate the games seriously, I used to think that all relationships worked like that, I used to think it proved something, but i'm exhausted. I just wanna be happy, go back to before the games.

I dont know why you're telling me to respect myself, thats a bit off tune. I dont get it, im not throwing myself at him, I'm just tired. He didn't always play with my heart, I want to go back to that man, the man before the games. I cant control love, im annoyed that I love him, but what can I do about it?

Why would you want to be with someone like that? Get him back? Is is even an option? if you had issues before you'll have issues again. May not be worth the trouble.
I know what you mean, im so tired, im so tired of crying and feeling like I have to prove myself worthy of someone that I know loves me, and I love him, I just dont know why it cant work if there's love. Just so depressing, like I honestly feel like we are wasting time, we will regret it, all this wasted time.
 
I know what you mean, im so tired, im so tired of crying and feeling like I have to prove myself worthy of someone that I know loves me, and I love him, I just dont know why it cant work if there's love. Just so depressing, like I honestly feel like we are wasting time, we will regret it, all this wasted time.
I regret just about every minute I spent with my ex-wife now. She also played games.I think of what I could have been doing rather than being with that manipulative, game-playing person. The signs were there for a while too, but I refused to see them. I know now that I was in denial, though I felt that I loved her. And I probably did at one time. Don't let people mess with you. If you know he's playing games, tell him to stop. If he doesn't, and he keeps playing games, then you are likely better off looking elsewhere. The games get old pretty quickly. You can find someone who treats you like you deserve to be treated.
 
I regret just about every minute I spent with my ex-wife now. I think of what I could have been doing rather than being with that manipulative game playing person. The signs were there for a while but I refused to see them. I know now that I was in denial, though I felt that I loved her. Don't let people mess with you. If you know he's playing games, tell him to stop. If he doesn't, and he keeps playing games, then you are likely better off looking elsewhere. The games get old pretty quickly. You can find someone who treats you like you deserve to be treated.
Was you ever scared, that you was walking away from the only family you've ever known? Like the only love you've ever known?
 

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