Recent content by Boring-Weirdo

I'm sorry my faith offends you. Maybe if we lived in American-Internet I'd be allowed to express my freedom of religion. If I wasn't so popular I'd have words for you, but I'll let you be judged by The Holy Book instead.

I call it like I see it. If you don't love Jesus, that's your fault. Don't blame it on me. Maybe you're the troll?

If you still have soda problems you may want to get a dog. Put the soda in the dog's watering bowl, then the dog will drink the soda instead of you. Just make sure the dog drinks all the soda, so you won't get to it later. I recommend naming the dog Dr Pepper or You've Got The Right One Baby...

I dunno, do you think life has meaning? Maybe Allah thinks that, maybe I do. I don't know, who cares? Donuts are good, I suppose that's a reason we can be happy to be alive. But donuts make you fat. Life is such a paradox. :P

Writing is a wonderful way to fill the time that we are all burdened with.

But where's the compassion for the bullies? Invite your bullies over and apologize to them for being such a tempting target. Then everyone can begin to heal... and to love.

It doesn't matter, because Jesus still believes in you. And you're in a personal relationship with Him, whether you like it or not.

I write letters like A G and Q if I am feeling frisky. I don't mail those letters to love, but I do kiss and hug them. <3

Don't worry, I'll pick up the slack and drink an extra 6 cans a day to even it out.

We are all in a relationship - a relationship with Jesus. If you can't take that relationship to a sexual level, well then I guess you have to prostrate yourself before Him.

I run at the speed of light so that I may enjoy the rest of my life in the fast lane. But while running I flagellate myself as penance for whatever I did to cause the Lord to smite the world.

Don't feel too bad; George Clooney is also known to have troubles getting dates. And if George Clooney can't get dates, I don't know what chance the rest of have! Things have been pretty bleak since women went on sexual strike in the seventies. Sure sperm banks have been doing booming...

Whenever I go out clubbing I say, "Helloooooo Baby!" This is always sure to work on any attractive men, but since I am not gay it's of no use to me. To get womens' attention I'll scream at them that the music is too loud to talk. After that opening I put my lips to their ears and try to have...

It's frankly ridiculous to assume that any relationship is good, or has the potential to be good. The opposite is also true. If you were to marry each person you ever met, you may find your true love several times, but it would never be a good relationship. It's survival of the fittest. If...

I'm just stating common sense. If you want to choose to be sexless, then you can choose to believe it is difficult to get sex. Sex is easy to find, love is hard. If you really want to get sex, you need to stop focusing on it. Instead, work on finding someone you really love and building a...