Recent content by cosmosandmusiclover

You sound really cool! Romantic relationships are NOT everything, and they are a lot of work, as I can tell you from having been in one for a bit over 8 years. I love my guy, don't get me wrong, but if it for some reason just didn't work out, I wouldn't make an effort to get into another...

Just to clarify, we aren't in any imminent danger of breaking up right now. I do hope we can continue to keep our relationship going AND continue to enjoy each other, but I'm just, I don't know, maybe a little cynical? This cynicism is informed by my life experiences. My mom and stepdad have...

Thank you Richard! There is such a stigma about being single, and I never agreed with that. I always figured if I ended up single, I could handle it and may even enjoy it. I enjoy my husband for the most part. Every relationship takes work and sometimes people also drift apart and go their...

I HOPE they do, don't get me wrong.  I guess after living through 2 parental divorces and seeing my mom and stepdad's relationship turn into one where they barely tolerate each other most of the time, I'm just realistic.  Relationships DON'T last forever.  Sometimes love is NOT all you need...

Paul, I know all about that particularly toxic aspect of Russian social culture, as my husband is from there! He did the "right path" academically, got what we call in the US a "master's degree," had the "right kind of job" in Russia (a "respectable" job). But then he moved here to the US, and...

I think you hit it right on the nose with your point #2 there. People who are more "mercenary" socially have more success socially. Bullies end up with more friends and are seen as more "attractive" socially because people have been conditioned to think being a bully = confidence =...

I just figured out another reason I self isolate (speaking more about friends than family). It's to protect me from rejection and hurt. I have experienced social rejection quite a bit for most of my life, despite going through a bit of a social phase during high school and college (mostly...

That is a valid point. Fair weather friends are way more common than true friends who will actually care about you as a person. I have had to filter through a lot of fair weather friendships. Friendships are very conditional, of course, but it seems like fairweather friendships hinge upon...

For those of us who actually isolate ourselves by not attending things, or just dropping out of touch and not maintaining relationships with people, I'm curious to know why others do it? For me, it often comes down to the fact that after 35 years of living, there are just not a ton of people...

Hi there, I'm new here as well!  I can relate to not being the "hugging and sharing" type at work, too.  For one, I'm reluctant to share too much of myself with colleagues because it can really get you in trouble.  I don't think it's appropriate to get too emotionally involved with coworkers...

Hello, and welcome! :)

Hi there and welcome!  I'm also new!  I remember feeling similar when I went to university at your age.  Alone while surrounded by lots of other people, and bereft of forming meaningful bonds.  You can learn to be happy with your solitude and learn to be alone without being lonely most of the...

Thanks so much for the warm welcome, everyone! :shy:  I did get to see my one BFF yesterday and it was wonderful to catch up!  She is entirely estranged from her mother and mom's side of the family (but they live abroad so it's pretty easy to not bump into them), and pretty much just has her dad...

I think that's valid. I am really obsessed with the Beatles, their history, their music, their interpersonal relationships with each other and their families, etc. I have been into them on and off for over 20 years (since Beatles Anthology came out in '95). I was a lonely kid with only one...

I decided not to have children, which I suppose one could call a "principle" although I think of it more like a lifestyle choice. It baffles my family to no end, and they can't accept it (even though my parents completely respect and even GET why). I get left out of things with my family...