rickyagnew

am diagnosed either chronic anxieties or bipolar,the dr.hates labels so i'm considered 'in the general area' of one or the other.i've always looked younger than my real age and from 30 years old hung out with younger people as much as 15 years my junior.i collect total disabilty and am considered totally disabled due to my sleep disorder.any stress at all..any ioda..and i'm not sleeping most or all of the night.having to work would keep me awake forever.i went through that in school./i hate macho and cocky people.i guess i'm an introvert.i love 80's music and movies and am into the 80's totally.i hate the 2000's with a passion.i also can't stand rap and hip hop music.pop and rock are my daily prefs./i moved to a small town to get away from crime and illegal aliens/i do have an issue regarding illegals./i'm a fairly shy person and enjoy stuff most think of as odd.i love cruising and talking on, and listening to the CB radio in the wee hours of the night.coffee shops and walmart in the a.m. hours//watching music videos of the 80's and early,mid 90's and listening to the music of those times./i like talking about kind of deep stuff as opposed to surface ,"how's the job going" type of talk/./i had an established platonic relationship (i'm not gay)with another male for over 20 years./he had to relocate and i miss that relationship terribally).i prefer to have one good friend as opposed to a group/.i wouldn't enjoy being in a platonic relationship with a group of people unless we're all pretty much on the same wavelength.and how possible is that i ask you.because of the fact i'm the age i am,but look younger, and want to hang with younger people,i don't get along with people my OWN age.needless to say,i don't have any friends.i've been totally alone for many years now.not many people enjoy 80's music and hanging out all hours of the night AND doing kid stuff as a past time./i have to face facts and i suppose i'm still a kid mentally/.i easily pass for being in my 30's so it's easy to meet younger people but often when i tell them my age or interests,they cruelly discontinue any interest in me. i was born and raised in the usa,but i read online that america is an extremely ageist country and the young people are horribally ageist and i definitely believe it.the dogs are also psychologically bent.seriously though,i'm all alone and have been for many years now and have become overly depressed. i need a friend who enjoys doing the same things and has a fairly introverted lifestyle.must have 21 fingers and an eyeball...okay..just an eyeball./to read why i'm so lonely go to my explanation page i created http://relationship.rr.nu