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Cheers Ringers! you sent me down a rabbit hole that lead to this piece of genius, The Rutles somehow, unlike Oasis, never managed to make a fortune out of ripping of The Beatles

Gotta say man, I love puppies of any size ;)

Yesterday my girlfriend thought she saw a cockroach in the kitchen. She sprayed everything down and cleaned thoroughly. Today I'm putting the cockroach in the bathroom.

Today is St Georges Day. In the early hours of this morning our unelected Prime Minister, with no mandate, forced his shameful ' Safety of Rwanda' bill through Parliament. So, for all those that can't see beyond their hate, here's a reminder of what it means to be English.

If you find a toilet in your dream, don’t use it. Rob a bank, you will have no trouble with rent or bills for the next 20 years, whether you are successful or not. No matter how nice the hand soap smells, don’t leave the restroom smelling your fingers.

Just brought some condoms and the cashier asked if I needed a bag. I said no, she's not that ugly.

I want to live simply, I want to sit by the window when it rains and read books I'll never be tested on. I want to play guitar because I want to, not because I've got something to prove. I want to listen to my body, fall asleep when the moon is high and wake up slowly, with no place to rush off...

Just for the record other religions are available if you want to go down that route. I'd suggest Satanism, despite their reputation history shows they've killed far less people than Christians, or indeed followers of any Abrahamic religion, in the name of their god.

If you're wearing a mask alone, inside your car I'm gonna go ahead and assume it's to control the urge to lick the windows.

Unanswered prayers? ... nah, f*ck that try sigil magic.

I want to get in my car and drive until I find what I'm looking for. Maybe it's purpose, maybe it's a fresh start or maybe it's just a sky full of stars.

Freya on my friends list says "Going to the dentist, really hate having things put in my mouth." Me: " That's why I left you, Freya." Blocked and unfriended by Freya.

Travel.Make memories. Have adventures. Because I guarantee that when you're 85 and on your death bed you won't think about that vintage car you bought, or the twenty Gibson and Fender guitars you owned. But you will think about that time you got lost in your favourite city. The nights spent...

The old world is dying and the new world struggles to be born, now is the time of monsters.

I hear this all the time all over the globe. The democratic process can’t transform immoral acts into moral ones. Therefore, participating in elections entails signing your name to countless misdeeds. Maybe you think that’s okay, that's a general 'you'. Maybe you believe you’re morally...

Yea Sunak and his majesty's opposition is led by Sir Keir Starmer, no idea why he was given a knighthood. Starmer is one of the most odious sociopathic pieces of sh*t I have ever seen in my life, and he embodies what the UK media and political class is perfectly. A pathological liar who...

Yea, we're in a very similar situation here in the UK, we have a PM that has no mandate because he wasn't elected by the people, so much for democracy, who has resorted to 'Trump tactics' attacking minorities and marginalised groups in a feeble attempt to retain power by causing division and...

Yeah yeah yeah, I'll use my vote but seriously man, if voting made a difference do you honestly think they'd let us do it?

I won the lottery too ... well that's what the bloody current missus keeps telling me 🤷‍♂️

When I say I'll do anything for you lady, I mean fight bad guys and kill dragons , not vacuum or wash the bloody dishes!