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Thank you for the encouragement, it's much appreciated. The problem with God is that in isolation, a person cannot know details about Him. They can maybe 'feel' something there but no details are made available because He does not speak. Only by the action of proxies does He communicate...

The bright light in the hallway surprises him, and it takes a moment for his eyes to adjust. There is no one at the door, and he peeks out into the long hallway. To the right he sees the maintenance guy talking at the door to one of the other apartments, and to the left a person is walking away...

In the darkness he sits alone, not happy not sad just sitting there thinking. He has been there since noon; in the same chair not moving. The darkness makes no difference to him, since there is no one it could hide or obscure besides him. In the darkness or the light there is nothing to see in...

Yes, being carried can breed dependance. It feels better the way you describe it - as a project or development of strength. Thank you. I guess if things were easy and comfy there would be no growth, only stagnation.

Thank you, I will take a look at the book, sounds relevant.

Thanks, I think I'm gradually making my own one, but it seems to have ups and downs of success 😄

The last person I talked to wanted to meet, but she asked about my religion. I am very faithful at times and sometimes feel there is nothing there, like now. She ghosted me after I told her that, and about the cult stuff...okay...as I type this I realise what you mean 😔 keep it light.

Thanks for the reply. I have developed this cognitive dissonance where I'm extremely filled with faith or an atheist. Sometimes I pray and feel a connection, but times like now I feel empty.

Good advice thank you. I was trying to solve my loneliness by trying dating apps, but I can't seem to communicate effectively. I get many matches but as soon as the conversation becomes more personal things don't work. Either my personality sucks, or I don't express myself properly. Not sure.

My brother invited me for BBQ yesterday. So I sent a whatsapp saying I would go, but then quickly deleted it after becoming anxious. Then he messaged asking if he should pick me up, and he even tried to phone, but I just put my phone on silent and ignored everything. It felt like I had no...

I'll have to try that, maybe it will awaken something in me again 😀

Faith is something you do to make God real in the face of his inaction or absence. I'm so tired of that. I guess I'm trying to find meaning post God, in the vacuum left by the loss of hope for eternal life.

Thank you, that makes sense. I think I need to work on my people skills because I tend to push loved ones away. I am trying, but I always end up isolating.

I struggle to communicate if I can't see the other person, so I end up being ghosted and feeling 'wrong' or irrelevant. Thanks for the reply.

Yes, I was feeling a bit hopeless I guess and too sensitive.

I may have been too quick, I think I'm a bit depressed/desperate.

Thanks

I grew up in a cult and at school the other kids would make fun of me incessantly because we had strange practices that made me stand out. So school was pretty lonely, but I always felt God was with me. Now years later I have become disillusioned about God. I have become tired of doing all the...

No, not leaving. I poured out my lonely soul about things like feeling invisible, and nobody responded. So I was overcome by sadness and deleted the text, and tried on another forum. I know the world doesn't revolve around me, but in that moment I just needed the universe to acknowledge me, but...

Thanks, I think too much, maybe I need some fresh air.