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I will be spending Xmas alone in an empty house. I just bawled by eyes out (about something devastating), and the thought of being alone on Xmas just makes everything harder.

Regardless of how you feel, I'm sure your daughter loves and will miss you if something happened to you. Teenagers or even young adults are brilliant at making parents feel that they are no longer needed, but that's just them and most of the time it's unintentional. Sometimes they are just too...

I miss my grandmother, especially when things get tough or feeling alone. I understand how you feel.

Warm welcome from a fellow newbie.