every now and then i get a little bit tired listening to the sound of my tears

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jales

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every now and then i get a little bit nervous that the best of all the years have gone by...
......together we can take this to the end of the line...forever's going to start tonight..

hi! lol i dont get tired of listening to my tears..its just i'm listening to that song right now (Total Eclispe of the Heart)..
how are you'll? Don't know if anyone will post yet but yea..

Do you ever wonder if some of us crave companionship more than others.. i mean i don't always crave someone, and I can reminisce on times of being content with my social life lol.

Whether learnt or natural (or a bit of both) I guess humans are social beings though..
there someone on this site ..minuzi (maybe i spelt the name wrongly)...i guess lately I've been starting to feel something like the way he/she speaks..
but not really
it's like losing energy to try, to meet people, to have another relationship end or fade or whatever..
but being human even though we say we've had enough...we still try again....

like Robert the Bruce and the Spider...lol (scottish legend)

I'm still young..and i know my life will be normal and all that...sometimes I have my pity moments (hopefully they wont be as often, once i'm older)

speaking of hope...running low on that little piece of magic

Anyway this is getting too long, i guess I wrote it for attention........to sorta expose myself (sad but yea)..who knows what nice people I might meet. That dam hope again.....magic I say.... lol

Now I'm really tired of changing people (who I get close to)..I want some one constant..maybe not for the rest of my life(if that's asking too much)..but a good ten, twenty year long friend..... ..
something good that's there for a while!
can anyone relate?

lol did anyone reach the end? lol...
 
Jales,

I know what you mean. I hear of people who have been lifelong friends since grade school, (sometimes even preschool, age 3 and 4) and I am quite jealous! I wonder how they managed to grow as human beings and not grow apart?
 
when you have friends hanging with you for so long, they become like siblings. but yes, people change and there'S always the possibly that they grow apart. it's funny, i too have that feeling that everything will turn out alright for me, between depressions which are happening less and less. optimistic by nature, broken by accident.. fix yourself to your own nature and bring your own special love to this world. geesh i write weird stuff i know.
 
thanx for replying..this site has a lot of nice people ....i guess i was just feeling all sad when i threaded..but i'm okay now (i think :0)

kah-kah-kah-483-mileS-means- :)
Emotionally, yea I am lonely... cus there's no one who I connect/click with at the moment. But hey, everyone's life is different!
 
you know i was in a really lonely..and later on a bad mood today and i wrote this

How do you erase a life?
I’m crying, and crying right now and I know that there are others in my shoes……….I don’t know how to explain everything or anything at all. I wouldn’t even know who to explain it to. They say if at first you don’t succeed you pick yourself up and try again..
Well that’s b*lls**t! I’m so f**king fed up of socializing….of trying…
When no one gives a f**k about anyone else…I don’t even give a f**k about anyone else
Yes I know it’s wrong to hurt other people and although I’m not a saint I can honestly say that I do try not to hurt others. I’m nice to others, and maybe there’s something in us that hates when other people are nice to us. Maybe we know that everyone else is ultimately evil and it can only be a trick…
Maybe we just like to be tortured cause it’s real.

yea i realise this thread is quite self-centered..i hope it dies off soon...or sumone makes an actual conversation out of it........

if anyone feels anything post pls!
thanks for listening to my emo ranting.........
 
Hi Sweetie,

People DO care. I know that most of the world is evil, but there iS good. There ARE people who care, I promise you!
 
Jales,
I wonder what happened to you to make you feel so sad, so disgusted with life..

This is a mean world we live in, and it's hard to see the good in people. Or to trust anyone. It seems like the bad outweighs the good.
But there are still kind people in our world, people that genuinely care. I can still say this with conviction, even after having lost all the friends I had that I was so sure cared about me.
 
This made me think of a certain line in a certain song from a great album.

"How could you learn to care, when nobody cares for you"

What I want to say is that I can fully understand that you're angry, and I doubt anyone blame you for it. Sometimes I get angry, sometimes I get depressed, sometimes I just get tired. So tired. We have all the reason to feel that way, and sometimes we need to feel that way. But we also need to feel good sometimes. Don't give up hope. Never give up hope. Hope can be your best friend when everything is against you.

Hope you're feeling better.
 
Just burst my lip and realized and although it hurts ..it’s nothing compared to the emotional pain that you can feel from being lonely.. I think my main problem with being lonely is that when no one is around me my mind can drift to anything, and for some reason MY mind likes to drift to the bad stuff.

It’s like it just looks for those times when I was hurt the most and can think of nothing else..but if your around people….whatever problems you have are masked for that moment cus you’re occupied with something fulfilling.

These days I’ve been really down ..it feels like I will never be able to connect with anyone. I know I sound like a drama queen but..i’m too bitter to care. It’s a bad place to get when you are bitter towards people you don’t even know..but I understand those people who are.

It’s not that I don’t relate to..or understand other people (which may be an issue on its own)…its just that everyone and everything moves to fast……so much gets missed….things are so fast that I never get to know a person and have them know me
Yet lots of people do get to know eachother and have others open up to them..so maybe its just something wrong with me….cause every time it does feel like something is moving at a normal paste..i’m not good enough….

Online friendships..woah..i think I’m the worst person in the world at that. In real life I don’t get rejected so much because I don’t talk to people whom I don’t know..but online… …where it’s actually (purely) me who is supposed to be being judged.......…it can feel like there must be something wrong with me

I mean I know there’s stuff wrong with me…but it hurts to know that there’s so much…..
Of course none of this really matters though.. I am who I am, it is only time which changes things..
Again I should say..i am depressed BUT not as depressed as I sound…

thanks Jeremi, Cleo and LG..and everyone else on this site..reading your threads an post are quite nice..even though i dont always comment
 

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