Why don't I have any friends? Here is who I am.

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kyle16

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Hey all, just found this forum when I was feeling a bit depressed. I guess I will tell about myself. Well, I seem to have a problem making friends. I have many acquaintances but there is no one that I would call a 'friend' that I know. Its not like i sit in a corner by myself, i do hang around with other people at lunch or after school, but then im by myself for the rest of the night or the weekend. I'm pretty sure I'm not socially awkward, I'm not loud, but I'm not very shy either. I don't think I look too ugly but I'm not the best looking guy either, I am 6'2 and very athletic. I play guitar well and get good grades in school, but I don't act 'nerdy'. The only people I think i could have called my friends were the guys on the track team that i run with, but they seemed only interested in hanging out when I did well and made it to a regional meet with them. By the way, im in grade 11. So the people that i was good friends with in elementary school im not good friends with now, because they still act like they are in elementary school. For some reason no girls seem especially interested in me, and all the girls that i know have either been in ten thousand relationships or just sleep around. I feel alone, why does no one want to be friends with me? :( thanks for reading this...sorry if its off topic
 
Hi there Kyle,

You sound like a pretty cool guy; with being on a track team, able to play the guitar well, good grades and etc.

That is talent!
(I wish I had some. :p)

Blaming yourself, "He/She doesn't like me because I'm...A, B, C etc." isn't going to do any favours for your self-esteem or alleviate the problem.
I've done that all my life and have found that I've become less and less confident in interacting people, which in turn, leads me back to the cycle of blaming myself once more.
If you can pull yourself out of that negative mindset, then you'll be doing yourself a great help.

So the people that i was good friends with in elementary school im not good friends with now, because they still act like they are in elementary school. For some reason no girls seem especially interested in me, and all the girls that i know have either been in ten thousand relationships or just sleep around.

Do you find that you lack common interests with your classmates?
Or maybe it is a difference in maturity level?

Whatever the case, I certainly don't find anything "wrong" with you, but just believe that you may have not yet met the right people who appreciate you and what you have to offer.

Hope you're having a better day. :)
(((((hug)))))
 
Hmmm... the annoying barrier of getting from school to the house. I wish I could help you. Have you tried inviting these acquaintances out?

As for the females, sorry I cannot help you. I can just say why not have some fun? If they have been in 10,000 relationships. Then just be the next one. Vet some practice for the next one. No harm in that, at least I think so.
 
Hey, you sound like me when I was in highschool. I'm 22/f and I didn't have anyone I'd really call a friend in highschool. It was mostly because I kept to myself and acted weird, because I am weird lol You sound like you have more going for you then I did though, haha I know the way I dealt with loneliness was I went online and got involved with forums and fandoms.

Here's what I think.

You're a little confused, I think. You might not realize what position you're in, or who you really are. This is very normal though, but it's really depressing and frustrating. Everyone is so different, and life is so hard, but the truth is, you have to try to see things from other people's perspective to understand your own. You sound like you want more out of your life, real friendship, maybe something like you see in the movies. People are doing their own things and have a lot of things going on, so you might just be falling to the way side because you're not a big part of their life.

It does happen, and its not that they don't like you, it's just that you aren't doing things with them, maybe. So, maybe this'll help. Who do you look forward to talking to when you're doing track? Now, next time you see them, ask if they wanna do something sometime. Sometimes you have to take initiative to get relationships started. But remember it takes time, and you can't force it. That gets hard when you really want a friend too ha

Wow I've said a lot...but what I'm trying to say is you're going through exactly what you should be going through. It's sad, it's frustrating, and it can be difficult, but you're a good person who's trying to figure out how social situations work. And if its too frustrating, do something to take your mind off of it for a while, like read something or try out a new hobby.

I hope this helps a little, and I hope it doesn't sound condescending (I've been told I sound like that somtimes, and I can't figure out why). Good luck :D
 
I agree with Luna with some points she made. I guess that if you think that people don't like you, you send off a vibe that makes them not like you. Don't get too depressed over girls, most HS girls are just not worth your time tbh. But, you can't force people to like you. I'm guessing that the people there just suck and you have to find the right ones that you click with.
I understand how you feel about your classmates acting like they're still in elementary school though, I feel the same way about mine -_-. It's sad that I'm going into grade 12, and people my age still act like they're 6.
 

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