I'm gonna try to pick up a girl in a bar tomorrow night...

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M

Mr. Sir

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I'm real nervous. The two guys I'm going to the bars and casinos with, one I know from school and he has approach anxiety so he won't talk to girls in public, but claims that he's only looking for "Catholic" girls which I know is a ******* load of horse honeysuckle. The other guy I actually met from the incel forum I'm on, and he's really hateful against women and says that my face is so ugly that no matter what I do, not even the ugliest fat chick would ever be interested in me unless I get plastic surgery.

I'm really nervous about the bar atmosphere. I'm afraid that the bad boys or wangsters will try to pick a fight with me if I talk to girls, or if I talk to too many girls than they will report me to the bouncer and get me handcuffed or kicked out or some honeysuckle.

Any ideas on how to talk to girls in a bar? I've never been in one before, but I turn 21 tomorrow, and it's a very high anxiety situation for me. Any suggestions? What should the opener be? When should I say something funny? How can I make myself smile if the situation is really scary and unnerving for me?

Also, women, please don't derail this thread by guilt-tripping me. Thanks.
 
SocratesX said:
but claims that he's only looking for "Catholic" girls

To quote (in paraphrase) from Pierce Brosnan in The Matador, "Catholic girls are all sucky sucky, no fucky fucky." lulz

SocratesX said:
I'm really nervous about the bar atmosphere. I'm afraid that the bad boys or wangsters will try to pick a fight with me if I talk to girls, or if I talk to too many girls than they will report me to the bouncer and get me handcuffed or kicked out or some honeysuckle.

LOL what? Don't worry about this stuff, man. Won't happen.

SocratesX said:
Any ideas on how to talk to girls in a bar? I've never been in one before, but I turn 21 tomorrow, and it's a very high anxiety situation for me. Any suggestions? What should the opener be? When should I say something funny? How can I make myself smile if the situation is really scary and unnerving for me?

Well, first, I think you need a clear goal in mind. If you're looking for a long-term girlfriend, then a bar or casino probably isn't the place to start. If you want a one-nighter, just some fun flirting, or a short-term fling, then sure. Go for it. If you're looking for a long-term thing, then I suggest you try the grocery store, a book store, or a public park.

Contrary to popular belief, you don't need an amazing pickup line or intelligent comment. Women go to bars for the same reason that men do. To have fun, get drunk, and meet fresia-dates. So keep that in mind when talking to them. I'm generalizing here a bit, but honestly... it's the truth.

Talk about what drinks are good. Talk about the music that's playing. Talk about her clothing. Talk about anything so long as you don't get into personal stuff. No bar-chick wants to hear about that. If she asks about you, just keep it short and simple. "I'm a student, I work at the deli, I'm letting off some steam tonight," etc. Something like that.

You don't have to know what to do. Just make her feel like she's having a good/interesting time, it's that simple. Try not to work this up into such a big deal, and you'll do fine.

And ditch those guy friends you're talking about. Or punch them in the nuts.
 
Honestly, why are you going out with a dude who's telling you your face is "ugly as fresia." fresia him. You're only as ugly as you want to be. This was the best piece of advice I was ever given, a woman will feel how you want her to feel. And yes, it's that simple. What that means is, if you feel like you're a valuable sexy guy, she will feel the same; to be honest man, I think you should be going in with different friends, some buddies who are fun dudes, fresia ******** who are going to bring you down. You don't want to be negative!

Here's a GOOD warmup. Sometimes, back when I used to go out late last year, if I was meeting friends at a bar, I would ask girls before hand on the street the time, where a place was, etc. This was to remind myself women aren't that scary. Anyways, once you're in the BAR when you're ordering a drink (doesn't have to be alcoholic if you don't drink), ask the waiter/waitress how their night is going, hopefully this will push you into a talkative mood. If you're consistently going back and forth to the bar, turn to the girl next to you while you're waiting ask her how her night is going, trust me, there's nothing to fear. Simply open with, "What are you ordering?" I said this to some girl friday, and she said something like, "Bubble Gum Vodka" and I responded, "Bubble gum vodka? That's pretty girly girl, haha, I don't know if you strike me as a girly girl though," BAM we had a conversation going. Like Jedi said, you can basically open with ANYTHING. But BE POSITIVE AND CONFIDENT, and IT'S OK TO BE EDGY AND TEASE HER.
 
As I said above, you don't really need pickup lines. Personally, I believe pickup lines are deadfully lacking in art and class.

But if you're insistent on having one, go with something like, "It's my birthday today, you know...and all day I've been secretly hoping for a b-day spanking! Sound good?" If she says, "yes," then reply with, "Alright. Bend over!" And then laugh as if it were funny.

Aside from that, if you just tell the girl that you're newly 21, she'll understand what that means. It means it's party time, it's GO time. And she just might be willing to provide you the party that you're looking for.
 
MrPUA said:
Honestly, why are you going out with a dude who's telling you your face is "ugly as fresia." fresia him. You're only as ugly as you want to be. This was the best piece of advice I was ever given, a woman will feel how you want her to feel. And yes, it's that simple. What that means is, if you feel like you're a valuable sexy guy, she will feel the same; to be honest man, I think you should be going in with different friends, some buddies who are fun dudes, fresia ******** who are going to bring you down. You don't want to be negative!

Most of the people I get along with except for a few tend to be too religious for one night stands. I feel really uncomfortable around partying fratboy types who frequent bars. They are usually not nice to me.
 
Talking to girls without expecting anything after 'hello' and 'goodbye' is definitely a good practice.

I did that at the bank today. They hired a new teller who's way cute. I wanted to see if I could get her to laugh, and today was my last day of work for the week (my 'Friday', even though it's really Thursday). So I said "I am so glad it's Friday." She looked at me funny for a second and she says, "Actually it's Thursday..." to which I responded, "But I'm off work for the week...so to me it's Friday." She laughed and said she was jealous. And that seemed to break the ice between us. Yeah, sure, you could say she's a bank teller and she's supposed to be nice to me. It's true. But it still helps to get more comfortable and there's a difference between 'fake nice' and 'that was genuinely funny' nice.

So maybe visit some other service establishments and follow suit?
 
Brian said:
So maybe visit some other service establishments and follow suit?

Yup. I'm not a big fan of meeting girls in bars.

Book stores, Parks, Hospitals, Grocery stores, etc. :D
 
SocratesX said:
The other guy I actually met from the incel forum I'm on, and he's really hateful against women and says that my face is so ugly that no matter what I do, not even the ugliest fat chick would ever be interested in me unless I get plastic surgery.

This actually makes me really, really angry. How dare anyone say that to someone, regardless of whether they're a close friend or not. You need to tell that guy to grow up because he clearly has issues - and if not, then he's seriously one of the biggest douches I've ever heard of. You deserve far better friends, honestly. :]

As for picking up girls, we aren't as scary as you think - promise! ^_^ Granted, some can be plain nasty... But whenever someone makes the effort to talk to me when I'm in clubs, I'll always be nice to them. Girls also get really nervous too when it comes to approaching guys - well, I do anyway! You may come across some girls who won't give you the time of the day, but they aren't worth your time anyway, and when you do come across someone who you just click with, it's certainly worth it. :]
 
Lower your expectations and just go with the flow.
It's more of a exposure kind of thing.
I don't remember of picking up a chick at a bar with the intention of trying to pick one up.
However I've met plenty of women over a period of time. Most of the time it's just me going
out to just have a good time. Onething leads to another then I end up waking up with 2 chicks
in their place. Or sometimes I'll just ask different women to dance...then we chit chat.
Then I'll see her again next week or in a couple of weeks. Then we chit chat and dance some more,
then she ask me what Im doing later and stuff like that. This is one thing you gatta understand.
It's really actaully up to the woman of how far she's going to let you in. A woman will make herself avaliable to
you if she's interested...trust me on this.

Just go out and have a good time.

I've been asked out by a lot of women but when they ask me out it's not the first time I saw them or spoken to them.
 
Badjedidude said:
Brian said:
So maybe visit some other service establishments and follow suit?

Yup. I'm not a big fan of meeting girls in bars.

Book stores, Parks, Hospitals, Grocery stores, etc. :D

Yea hospitals are great places to pick up chicks. Lonely widows are made there.
 
Haha I was talking about the nurses, mostly.

Just go in and make up an excuse about visiting a sick relative. And then hit on the nurses. :p

It beats sitting at home alone watching TV.

And lonely widows never hurt anybody. XD
 
SocratesX said:
I'm real nervous. The two guys I'm going to the bars and casinos with, one I know from school and he has approach anxiety so he won't talk to girls in public, but claims that he's only looking for "Catholic" girls which I know is a ******* load of horse honeysuckle. The other guy I actually met from the incel forum I'm on, and he's really hateful against women and says that my face is so ugly that no matter what I do, not even the ugliest fat chick would ever be interested in me unless I get plastic surgery.

I'm really nervous about the bar atmosphere. I'm afraid that the bad boys or wangsters will try to pick a fight with me if I talk to girls, or if I talk to too many girls than they will report me to the bouncer and get me handcuffed or kicked out or some honeysuckle.

Any ideas on how to talk to girls in a bar? I've never been in one before, but I turn 21 tomorrow, and it's a very high anxiety situation for me. Any suggestions? What should the opener be? When should I say something funny? How can I make myself smile if the situation is really scary and unnerving for me?

Also, women, please don't derail this thread by guilt-tripping me. Thanks.

Stuff like being thrown out of a bar only happens if you make it happen. It doesn't happen if you just sit there, minding your own business and don't bother anyone.

If your friend is so hateful against women, why is he going to a bar with you to go pick women up? I sense serious mental issues with him. By going with him, you won't get very far in picking anyone up.

And oh, I doubt you're so ugly that not even the ugliest fat chick would ever talk to you. Oh no, because it's your face that's the issue, right? Not your nasty attitude against women, or people in general.

But don't mind me. I won't guilt-trip ya. :)
 
VanillaCreme said:
SocratesX said:
I'm real nervous. The two guys I'm going to the bars and casinos with, one I know from school and he has approach anxiety so he won't talk to girls in public, but claims that he's only looking for "Catholic" girls which I know is a ******* load of horse honeysuckle. The other guy I actually met from the incel forum I'm on, and he's really hateful against women and says that my face is so ugly that no matter what I do, not even the ugliest fat chick would ever be interested in me unless I get plastic surgery.

I'm really nervous about the bar atmosphere. I'm afraid that the bad boys or wangsters will try to pick a fight with me if I talk to girls, or if I talk to too many girls than they will report me to the bouncer and get me handcuffed or kicked out or some honeysuckle.

Any ideas on how to talk to girls in a bar? I've never been in one before, but I turn 21 tomorrow, and it's a very high anxiety situation for me. Any suggestions? What should the opener be? When should I say something funny? How can I make myself smile if the situation is really scary and unnerving for me?

Also, women, please don't derail this thread by guilt-tripping me. Thanks.

Stuff like being thrown out of a bar only happens if you make it happen. It doesn't happen if you just sit there, minding your own business and don't bother anyone.

If your friend is so hateful against women, why is he going to a bar with you to go pick women up? I sense serious mental issues with him. By going with him, you won't get very far in picking anyone up.

And oh, I doubt you're so ugly that not even the ugliest fat chick would ever talk to you. Oh no, because it's your face that's the issue, right? Not your nasty attitude against women, or people in general.

But don't mind me. I won't guilt-trip ya. :)

Hey, yah, sure I'm going to a bar to just sit there by myself.

Secondly, you do realize that my anxiety in talking to women is so high, so why on earth do people have the impression that just because I have views shaped by the fact that women in the past have been really nasty to me because I haven't had a particular image that I go up to women and start talking misogyny.

That argument makes no sense because you have to understand that it would be impossible for me to tell a woman that I "have a bad attitude towards women" considering I can't even get five words out.
 
That guy who says you're ugly is a jerk. As long as you have the right personality, you've got to have an extra hand growing out of your nostril to be too ugly to get a girl. He must have some self esteem issues to say something like that to you.

Don't be afraid. Women are people, too. Think of us as guys. With inverted penises. That, and a lot of females are more willing to talk about their feelings than a lot of males.
 
SophiaGrace said:
Why do you measure your self worth by whether or not you've had sex yet?

Sex is only, like, the one and only thing that determines whether or not we're worthy of the oxygen we breathe, the water we drink, the life the Great Pumpkin has provided for us...
 
nerdygirl said:
Sex is only, like, the one and only thing that determines whether or not we're worthy of the oxygen we breathe, the water we drink, the life the Great Pumpkin has provided for us...

I'm intrigued by the fact that I can't tell whether you're being sarcastic or not. :)
 
Maybe you should lower your goal to 'talking to a girl in a bar' instead of trying to pick one up. If you've never even been to a bar before, the odds of you going home with a girl is pretty low. Honestly, if I were you, I'd settle for having a positive conversation (i.e. she doesn't tell you to fresia off), with getting a number being a nice bonus. And for God's sakes don't let your 'friend' join in on ANY conversation you might get going.

Don't try to use the 'I just turned 21' thing in any way. All variations of that theme have been used to death already.
 
Lol, Nerdy.

SocratesX said:
Hey, yah, sure I'm going to a bar to just sit there by myself.

Secondly, you do realize that my anxiety in talking to women is so high, so why on earth do people have the impression that just because I have views shaped by the fact that women in the past have been really nasty to me because I haven't had a particular image that I go up to women and start talking misogyny.

That argument makes no sense because you have to understand that it would be impossible for me to tell a woman that I "have a bad attitude towards women" considering I can't even get five words out.

Why are you not able to get more than five words out? And I'm pretty certain you don't have to tell anyone you have a bad attitude. You pretty much show it, and have it in your aura.
 

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