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My mom passed away, now I'm alone
#21
Constant stranger,

thanks for honesty

i partially know what you feel. I do not miss my mum too. It may sound selfish but i regret things i have done to her. That's it. In opposite to you i was not for here when she suffered. She didnt tell me but it is my fault she didnt - i was upsetting her constantly by my behaviour

Ahsatan- thanks
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#22
It doesn't sound like your family was very functional in the loving kindness department. Mine wasn't either. Another thing we have in common is regretting what we've done and probably things we wished we'd done but didn't. But both our families are part of the past now and I'm finding out that it's taken me a couple of months to start feeling sort of comfortable with knowing that the "old normal" is gone. The operative word is 'starting to feel comfortable'.

OK that's to say nothing of figuring out what the next "new normal" is going to be. letsmakefriends, we both have a life to live....that sounds like a pretty big deal, kind of melodramatic....probably the way to go is one step at a time. Identify what's important first, do that and get it accomplished. Then ID the next task, do that and get it done. Then repeat and repeat again.

It'd be good to get some gladness and joy worked into the equation too, wouldn't it?
Contentment comes from within.  Do not seek it from outside yourself.

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#23
I'm truly sorry for your loss. I'm very close to my mom so I can only imagine. I hope everything is going okay for you.

For a hobby I would recommend volunteering with the homeless because it reminds you of what blessings you have while also helping others which is a great feeling.

Are you doing okay?
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