Borderline Personality Disorder

Hi guys;

I've been having some problems lately. Some relationship problems. I'm not sure if I should be writing this thread. Basically, I'm not sure if I have Borderline Personality Disorder, or atleast some other problem.
Anyways, I've always felt unloved, like everybody hates me. Despite the fact that my parents and my closest friend is constantly reassuring me, I never seem to "get it". Because of this I try my best to please everyone, and when I am unable to do so, I get really hurt. For some reason, I only seem receptive to criticism and never to love. This has always been since I can remember. I can remember as a youth constantly seeking my parents approval.

I have a history of alcohol abuse and self harm in order to numb myself from rejection. Especially rejection of someone I loved very very much. This person I've known them since I was a child, and I always looked up to them. I always wanted to grow up just like them, I always wanted to be a part of their life. Since the realization that they do not want me as a part of their life, I have been turning to self harm, more and more to knumb the emotions.

To top it off, I have these wild fluctuating moods. I think all the way untill 3:00 p.m I was extremly depressed, and now I'm feeling fine and telling myself "Nothing's the problem, your happy so therefore your fine".

I'm sorry if this is really vauge, but I'm not used to expressing myself. I'm already taking something for depression. Is this "normal" or is it something I should see a professional for?

Thanks everybody.

Only someone suitably qualified would be able to make a diagnosis. That's the long and the short of it I'm afraid.

Steel said:

Only someone suitably qualified would be able to make a diagnosis. That's the long and the short of it I'm afraid.

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Thanks for not sugar-coating your reply.

I'm just having this little argument with myself right now trying to decide weather I should see s specialist about it.

Well, you are obviously concerned, and so seeing a specialist would be the best thing to do in my opinion.

Steel said:

Well, you are obviously concerned, and so seeing a specialist would be the best thing to do in my opinion.

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Thanks again. I guess I just needed some reassurance that I'm doing the right thing.

there is a BPD thead here

http://www.alonelylife.com/showthread.php?tid=10622

Hey there.
i would say - yeah, it's a good idea to talk someone.

they might give you some answers, or some ways to deal, or you yourself will have some fresh insight.

you don't sound bipolar - but i think that whether you do or do not is slightly beside the point as it clearly seems like you have some issues to deal with. (and heh. self harm... doesn't work. not for long term. and has a tendency to cause more problems later on.)

you sound like a cool person, and i do hope you will find a way out of this.

have a good one.

dead.

bipolar is a chemical imbalance not the same as BPD

dead said:

Hey there.
i would say - yeah, it's a good idea to talk someone.

they might give you some answers, or some ways to deal, or you yourself will have some fresh insight.

you don't sound bipolar - but i think that whether you do or do not is slightly beside the point as it clearly seems like you have some issues to deal with. (and heh. self harm... doesn't work. not for long term. and has a tendency to cause more problems later on.)

you sound like a cool person, and i do hope you will find a way out of this.

have a good one.

dead.

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Thanks for the encouragement. It has really brightened up my day.

Yeah the self-harm thing is pretty "messed up", sometimes I even ask myself "What the hell are you doing." I guess it's all about that "quick-fix".

if i have - i am glad

yeah... only problem is it's too quick to become more of a problem than a fix, i guess.
eh.