EverFlowingSpring
Member
- Joined
- Sep 5, 2010
- Messages
- 9
- Reaction score
- 0
I feel like I am drowning and coming up for gasps. My glimpses of the world are vague and sometimes frantic, and the rest of the time I'm buried in a deep place.
I really don't want any help even. I can't believe it's so hard to make a friend, and everyone I talk to just drops contact shortly after we've met.
My isolation from the world is beginning to make me feel like I'm losing touch. I walk through the world like a ghost, in some world I'm not meant to be. There's nothing wrong with me physically, and I don't think mentally, but I can't help feeling as I walk down the street like I'm intruding in the world of others, where everyone is living their little lives and I'm just star crossed. Sometimes my mind warbles at any contact.
I don't really even feel the need to say these things about how I feel, or maybe that's not true... I only feel the need when my attempts at coherency and realism seem futile.
I'm happy this forum exists, but I find in it just another abstract set of internet symbols and for all it could matter automated responses. I've been my whole life without a friend and now everything is just empty and at the best of times I am filled with the feeling of a hysterical laughter that doesn't exist enough to actually be let out.
When I write I find it almost impossible to keep focus on a character and a connection to nature or environment doesn't come naturally.
Is there any real people out there, or am I actually a ghost catching only fading glimpses of a once real world?
I really don't want any help even. I can't believe it's so hard to make a friend, and everyone I talk to just drops contact shortly after we've met.
My isolation from the world is beginning to make me feel like I'm losing touch. I walk through the world like a ghost, in some world I'm not meant to be. There's nothing wrong with me physically, and I don't think mentally, but I can't help feeling as I walk down the street like I'm intruding in the world of others, where everyone is living their little lives and I'm just star crossed. Sometimes my mind warbles at any contact.
I don't really even feel the need to say these things about how I feel, or maybe that's not true... I only feel the need when my attempts at coherency and realism seem futile.
I'm happy this forum exists, but I find in it just another abstract set of internet symbols and for all it could matter automated responses. I've been my whole life without a friend and now everything is just empty and at the best of times I am filled with the feeling of a hysterical laughter that doesn't exist enough to actually be let out.
When I write I find it almost impossible to keep focus on a character and a connection to nature or environment doesn't come naturally.
Is there any real people out there, or am I actually a ghost catching only fading glimpses of a once real world?