Understanding

It is a feeling that most people I know don't understand. I love being alone because it's the only place where I can truly be myself. When I am alone no one is judging me. I really enjoy being alone for that reason, but I never used to be. I used to have tons of friends and loved to be around people all of the time. Now I have this constant fear that I am being judged and will be rejected...especially by guys.
Rejection is my one biggest fear. Because of this I have been isolating myself from any type of social situation. It is easier for me if I don't have to talk to anyone.
It is really hard because no one understands this about me and I cant just tell people. People do not understand when I try to explain they just say to me to stop it that I am over reacting. I cant handle it anymore. I just wish someone could understand what I am going through.

Hi there Yes, it is true. People judge one another. this will be true your whole life, and it will be from everyone - both people you know and strangers, so it is something that one must try to get past. Not everyone feels the same way about things, and there will definitly be many people who judge you as a good person that they would like to get to know. Isolating yourself is easy, and putting yourself out there is tough.

good luck.

But is it really worth it to put myself out there? What is the benefit in the end? I just don't know anymore...

There are benefits. You may find good friends.

But you should do it for yourself; do it to improve your confidence, and making friends will be an added benifit. Try to become a stronger person to help yourself.

But im no sage with wisdom that will change your life

i once locked myself in my own mind for years and talked to almost no one.

I regret the years I lost.



you will not be judged here I hope you stick around

It is really weird to think about how someone I don't even know can make me feel better.
You're right, I don't want to regret not putting myself out there. I am going to go out this weekend with my friends instead of staying in by myself.

I understand that. That's why i need alone time.
I like to spend my alone time in open space in nature though....away from people.
Open space helps me clear my mind...
Alone time inside becomes like a prison after a while for me...cabin fever..Errrr
Yeap...no demands, this is right, that is wrong, think like this, act like that...etc.

For me however..I needed to get back into the main stream of life...
becuase i need fucken money.
Plus I like 2 have SEX with women. I have decent social skills.

Its a balancing act....I like my alone time everyday though.
Do whatever i wanna do or do nothing...
mmmm...I think my self esteem has gotten better...I do whatever the fresia around people now anywho.
It dosn't bother if people understands me anymore. I don't think they'll ever will.
What matters most is that i understand myself.
Other people wont make me happy...I make myself happy wheather I'm around people or not.