skin color and your Origin : Is this a big issue???

Hello all,

I have just become a member and this is my very 1st post on the forum.

To begin with,I am a very lonely man!

I am an international flight attendant by proffesion and I obviously have to deal with alot of different people from all walks of life.

I have been forced to stay indoors (which I always do) due to all the harrasment I go thru on a daily basis because of where I come from and my skin color.I am not a bad looking human and I am a friendly person by nature,however certain comments/attitudes/looks and facial expressions I get to deal with from many have restricted me either to my hotel room when on flights overseas or just at home,leaving me so missarably lonely.

my Isolation from the rest of the world have grown so severe,that I carry my own food,when I travel,so that I dont need to get out of the hotel to a restaurant.

Is skin color a big problem to many? am I so unwelcomed in this world?

You mean race or little sun or what?

Achpoques said:

You mean race or little sun or what?

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yes,I mean the "race"..

Hi SD,

I just read your bio information with location, and I understand what you're talking about now, and can definitely see your point, and it's really sad that it's gotten to be that way. I can't even imagine what you go through welcoming passengers into the plane. However, I will say welcome to the site, and having an international airport not so far from here (actually three withing 1 1/2 hours away) I say that I would definitely welcome you to port, as would many others on this site.

Southern, I'm sorry that your race and skin tone has caused you such pain.

It's not your fault.

Many people are close-minded. They REALLY need a wake up call!

PS Do you live in India? I noted there that skin tone is quite important.

First of all welcome to our site. I can relate to how you feel. I'm of East Indian descent and I'm medium brown in complexion. The sad part is I may be treated negatively by people of a similar skin colour or darker than myself, while they treat people with lighter complexions like royalty.

Actually Lonelygirl, many people in the East Indian diaspora have that same level of closed-mindedness about skin colour although they were born and grew up in the Western world so it's not endemic to India alone.

I find it very sickening when people judge others by skin colour alone.

I agree, Cooljohn. It's bizarre and sad.

These same people INSIST that they are not brainwashed by western standards of beauty.

Hmm who knows? All races have traditionally valued light skin as it indicates royalty or no need to work outside in the sun, right?

I agree w/ both lonelygirl and cooljohn.

but you have to remember this:
for every mean-spirited racist out there, there are two people who will support you.
The world is full of colors. Racists are people who just see in black and white.

Wasn't there some racial aspects to India's caste system? Maybe I'm mistaken, but, I believe there were. It is typical in many societies for paler skins to be seen as more beautiful. I know that's the case in many East-Asian countries, and it's been like that waaay before they encountered Caucasian people.

Zorg said:

Wasn't there some racial aspects to India's caste system? Maybe I'm mistaken, but, I believe there were. It is typical in many societies for paler skins to be seen as more beautiful. I know that's the case in many East-Asian countries, and it's been like that waaay before they encountered Caucasian people.

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Thanks for all the replies and support....however I must say I have not had any problems travelling to or in India at all.most of the time,its the English speaking western world,that has made me feel Isolated....

I recently talked to a eastern European girl,who works with me.she was in similar situation as I am.she says when she speaks English,native speakers treat her differently due to her accent....she says she has been made to feel what she calls "stupid".

but then again,listening to most of your comments written here,it is also a consolation that not all are the same.

I thank u all for your input!

Just remember that there are only TWO kinds of people in this world: God's people of ALL Races, colors, shades, and then those fools deceived by the Evil One. TWO kinds of people, all the rest is a Lie from the Adversary. Divide and Conquer, he's been doing it for thousands of years now!

I think the darker the skin the more beautiful it is, I am eastern eroupean by the way, with light skin (wish I had a darker complection).

I wish I had dark skin too. I feel so dull especially on summer.

I am an Aussie, but I have a european complection, alot of people think that I'm Italian.

I like light skin and medium skin and dark skin. Whatever kind of skin you're in, God made it that way. If you are light, enjoy being light. If you are dark, enjoy being dark. ACCEPT YOURSELF for heaven's sake! ;-)

(Smiths lyrics)

I never saw more than four people that were darker than George Bush (only picked him cause he is someone that most, if not all of you have seen) till I was 18.

I grew up in a completely white world, and the funny thing is I didn't encounter racist people until I moved to places with mixed races.

Guess when everyone has the same color they don't really have any reason to be racist about another people...

A black family moved into our neighborhood when I was younger. The parents and two children joined our church, and we accepted them as we would anyone else... generally people just seemed interested and happy that they could share their experiences of a different culture with the community.

The first racist person I met was a black guy and he actually hated other black guys... thought it was strange but kind of funny cause he just figured everyone was racists. He was always trying to get me to say something racists about one race or another, but really I had no reason to be racists.

I had trouble though once when a Native American that I never said one word to came right up to me and stood with his face a few inches from mine and shouted how he hates "people like me" and "my kind"... I was confused more than anything cause I didn't do or say anything... I hadn't even noticed him till he got in my face. I struggled after that for a while not to think bad about other Natives just because of that one jerk. A couple years later I was lucky enough to get on a crew working with two Natives... they were great and they even said I must be part Native too because I was working as hard as they were (those two cousins were just amazing workers and I'm a workaholic with a very high pain threshold so I can keep up with anyone). That helped heal any remaining emotional scar from that one idiot that treated me bad for no reason... it's the fault of the individual, not the race... that guy just had a chip on his shoulder and thought to take it out on me... it didn't come to punches but pretty close... I just stood there and didn't say a word... I was so confused about why he was angry that I wasn't sure if I should laugh at him or smash in his teeth... my friend came back to the shop with the boss and the guy just went back to his bench without another word... it was a weird situation. But truth is I haven't traveled foreign countries so I can't say first hand about how things are abroad.

I think that's the biggest part of the problem though... one person gets hurt by someone of another race and they pass it on to someone of the race that hurt them... so the cycle just continually perpetuates itself... sad really... skin color means so little when friends can be made no matter the skin or appearance.

Personally I like accents, even if sometimes it makes for more difficult speech. I respect it in guys cause you can speak at least two languages which is a good accomplishment (plus I find it funny in a good way... I'd be more likely to continue a conversation with a stranger that has an accent then one that does not), and as an added bonus for the women I find it very attractive. I've dated a French and a Czech girl and loved working around the language barrier... and trying to get them to teach me certain intimate words in their own languages is always fun

I'm sorry to hear that people have driven you to hide out in your hotel... I always respected flight attendants... maybe even envied them a little... many of my professions over the years have been carefully chosen to keep me isolated from people, or at least keep me only with a crew of people that I could get to know and grow comfortable with over a few weeks. To see you greeting and dealing with so many different people all the time amazes me.

I totally agree, Lost in the Oilfield, with what you say. Fascinating! And true! People, under neath our skin, society, cultures, languages, attitudes, religions, politics, etc...it all boils down to the fact that we are all HUMAN. There is only ONE race, the human race! And people should be getting along and liking each other and being friends regardless!

There are all kinds of people in this world. Some people are born and brought to be racist and some peopel are very nice. Racism exists everywhere in the world. It just vaires in what form it take and how. Sometimes things are just natural and has nothing to do with the racism but because of bad experience we just associate it with racism. Also, the myth is that recism is always white vs not white which is not really true. Racism takes place in various forms, even people of same color, same religion, same nationality could be racist with each other for some differetn reasion. I am Indian and working in UK since last 4+ year. Eventhough MOST of the white wont accept you by heart and socialise with you, majority are nice when it comes to day to day life. Some people are really very nice. Initially I would feel very bad and get hurt by racism but now I just choose to ingore it and focus on my life. You can't change someone's attitude or way of thinking but at least you can change yourself. Always be positive and never stereotype people. There are nice people as well. I have been very lonely in my life. But I never judge anyone by color, race, natinoality etc. As long as the person is nice I dont mind anything else.

SD, please just because of few bad experiences dont confine yourself indoors. You could definitely meet some nice poeple.

I think it is a still a big issue in society. Racism in this country has often, with no disrespect to black or white people, been a black/white issue. More recent immigrants still get a lot of hate from society, especially (nowadays) those of Middle Eastern descent. You can even see a bit of latent bias in the media, where "Chinaman" jokes are still aired and considered "funny." However, make a joke that has something subtly offensive to African Americans and your career is dead and you are basically burned at the figurative stake. I'm of Indian and Middle Eastern descent, and I still get a lot of glares for it. I also tend to get the short end of the stick everywhere I go. Everytime I go to a bar or a club or something, I am always charged a cover, even when my friends (who are white) can just walk by. I don't let it bother me, and I will never use "racism" as an excuse for my lack of success- but it still exists and is a problem. I was exposed to discrimination very early in life, which is why I am pretty used to it by now. People have a lot of preconceived notions about me. People assume that I don't have a very good command of the English language. People assume that I'm cheap because some Indian people are. People assume that I own a gas station or convenience store, wear a turban, and am a Hindu. I am none of these things. Or sometimes people assume that I'm a fundamentalist Muslim bent on terror. This happens a lot at airports. But you know what I tell myself? Better safe than sorry. A lot of those awful terrorists DID look similar to me. It is discriminatory, but I can understand that. Now in public, there is no excuse. Centuries of racism have even made people hate themselves. Look at most former British colonies of dark-skinned people- the whole social hierarchy has skin color as a factor. Asian and Indian people have a huge market for lightening creams. Central and South America discriminates based on race too. The problems are "heirloom stereotypes." A few bad people from a minority apparently ruin it for the whole race. Take a recent example- the VA Tech shooter was Korean. Instead of the media focusing on his mental illness or personal problems, they focus on "Korean." As a result, the Korean community apologizes for it. FOR WHAT? People are individuals- not representatives of their race. Another problem is education. I have to say this, although it will probably piss some people off. I am tired of the Western perspective on WORLD history. A western perspective on American and European history is more appropriate, but an objective one is the best. Ancient civilizations are always painted as "primitive" even though they were the original developers of many of the technologies and societal structure that we enjoy today. I hate Columbus Day- a man who messed up, thought he was in India, and helped with the massacre of Native people is NOT a hero. I hate the term "third-world." I hate the term "minority." I am in a lot of biology/health classes and every teacher always says "minorities tend to be lower socioeconomic status, lower education, and have more chronic health problems, etc." I take offense to that-Indians in the US are the highest-earning SES race out of anybody, but we and other races are lumped together as poor, stupid, and diseased. No wonder people give me dirty looks. I understand where you're coming from SD, but the only way to overcome the inevitable racism is to be OK with yourself. Keep on doing things for your life and don't listen to ignorant people. Don't EVER believe that you are lower than anyone else, no matter how much honeysuckle you get for being YOU. Feel sorry for those people- they wallow in their own ignorance.

20years2many said:

I think it is a still a big issue in society. Racism in this country has often, with no disrespect to black or white people, been a black/white issue. More recent immigrants still get a lot of hate from society, especially (nowadays) those of Middle Eastern descent. You can even see a bit of latent bias in the media, where "Chinaman" jokes are still aired and considered "funny." However, make a joke that has something subtly offensive to African Americans and your career is dead and you are basically burned at the figurative stake. I'm of Indian and Middle Eastern descent, and I still get a lot of glares for it. I also tend to get the short end of the stick everywhere I go. Everytime I go to a bar or a club or something, I am always charged a cover, even when my friends (who are white) can just walk by. I don't let it bother me, and I will never use "racism" as an excuse for my lack of success- but it still exists and is a problem. I was exposed to discrimination very early in life, which is why I am pretty used to it by now. People have a lot of preconceived notions about me. People assume that I don't have a very good command of the English language. People assume that I'm cheap because some Indian people are. People assume that I own a gas station or convenience store, wear a turban, and am a Hindu. I am none of these things. Or sometimes people assume that I'm a fundamentalist Muslim bent on terror. This happens a lot at airports. But you know what I tell myself? Better safe than sorry. A lot of those awful terrorists DID look similar to me. It is discriminatory, but I can understand that. Now in public, there is no excuse. Centuries of racism have even made people hate themselves. Look at most former British colonies of dark-skinned people- the whole social hierarchy has skin color as a factor. Asian and Indian people have a huge market for lightening creams. Central and South America discriminates based on race too. The problems are "heirloom stereotypes." A few bad people from a minority apparently ruin it for the whole race. Take a recent example- the VA Tech shooter was Korean. Instead of the media focusing on his mental illness or personal problems, they focus on "Korean." As a result, the Korean community apologizes for it. FOR WHAT? People are individuals- not representatives of their race. Another problem is education. I have to say this, although it will probably piss some people off. I am tired of the Western perspective on WORLD history. A western perspective on American and European history is more appropriate, but an objective one is the best. Ancient civilizations are always painted as "primitive" even though they were the original developers of many of the technologies and societal structure that we enjoy today. I hate Columbus Day- a man who messed up, thought he was in India, and helped with the massacre of Native people is NOT a hero. I hate the term "third-world." I hate the term "minority." I am in a lot of biology/health classes and every teacher always says "minorities tend to be lower socioeconomic status, lower education, and have more chronic health problems, etc." I take offense to that-Indians in the US are the highest-earning SES race out of anybody, but we and other races are lumped together as poor, stupid, and diseased. No wonder people give me dirty looks. I understand where you're coming from SD, but the only way to overcome the inevitable racism is to be OK with yourself. Keep on doing things for your life and don't listen to ignorant people. Don't EVER believe that you are lower than anyone else, no matter how much honeysuckle you get for being YOU. Feel sorry for those people- they wallow in their own ignorance.

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I dislike the way history is taught also, but I dislike so much about this country I want to abandon it. It is just not worth the effort as far as I can feel and I want to leave, and I am completely tired of the way history is taught here also.