i hate when something like this happens...

so i work at a movie store as some of you already know. this guy comes in today and starts asking me whats good that has come out recently. i find out what kid of movies he likes and start suggesting things. he likes sci-fi like i do so its easy to start talking about movies with him. then he asks me if my girlfriend likes to watch what i like to watch. i told him i didnt have one right now. then he says "well when you did, did she?" im thinking to myself, i have never really had one. but im not going to say that to him because it will be akward so i just say "no." then he starts talking about how its the same for him and he doesnt get that. now im only half paying attention because now mind is drifting with thoughts of loneliness. i hate when stuff like that happens. its just a reminder of how i dont have anyone. it put me in a sad mood for a while tonight.

I know how you feel. Went to the doctor years ago for a full body check up. The doctor thought my request was strange so he asked me if I've been having sexual intercourse. Suspecting I was there to check for STD. I smiled and said no but I was sad on the inside because at that point I was still a virgin and was already twenty.

Oh the things that people assume....

Oh I understand how you feel..I've had moments where people assumed I was with someone and when I told them I wasn't they would wonder why and they didn't believe me that I've never been with anyone....but it shouldn't get to you....I'm in my 20s and a virgin and yes some days it makes me feel sad and some days it doesn't because..well...it just ain't the end of the world lol...and I'm still young it's never too late

if you're not in a relationship and you don't mind being alone then does it matter what people think of you :/ ? and if it bothers you, well just tell yourself that the right person will come eventually ^^ you never know, but it's not sitting all day and doing nothing that's gonna make it happen ( not that you are, idk lol )

I have a friend that's 25 and still a virgin and never been in a relationship either and she complains a lot about it....and has major self esteem issues which prevent her from taking necessry steps to actually go out and meet people...she usually stays home and hangs out with me from time to time.....I think it's important to understand what's preventing or keeping us from interacting with people o: and seeking help for it ^_^

I wish you goodluck *hugs* and remember you're not alone ;3; <3

thanks guys. im 28 and still a virgin. being a male virgin and approaching 30 really sucks. i have had to lie to certain people about being a virgin because i dont feel like dealing with what they might say. or they will INSIST on "getting me laid" and i am not looking for a random sexual encounter. i just dont feel like dealing with all that. its like some stupid macho thing or something and me still being a virgin is like i might as well have the ebola virus or something. its like there is something wrong with me in one way or another to a lot of people. and thats without me even saying that other than a random high school summer fling i have never had a girl friend or even dated for that matter.

i know what you mean, bro. everyone just assumes that i have a girlfriend, or that i'm married, or that i have kids but none of that is true. when they say things like that, it does bum me out sometimes too. i guess it's just because of my culture. i'm mexican-american, so by the time you reach my age (24), my people expect you to be settled down and raising kids already. i'm not ready for that, so i think i'll stick to my loneliness and singleness for a couple more years while i sort and mold my life out.

It's worst when you tell them and they're not surprised :\

Its pretty unfortunate I know how you feel cuz ive been trying to meet someone for a long time. Have you ever tried plentyoffish? I guess a lot of people have luck on there, I was not one of them but just a suggestion. I don't know much about women I only had one girlfriend myself but what I can tell you is I know absolutly nothing about what a girl wants and they are impossible to figure out. I wish I didn't sleep with my ex though just thinking about it now... what a nightmare! You will be glad you waited for the right girl in the long run.

i have tried quite a few dating sites now but i never seem to really get any matches in my area. also its like they only let you communicate with your matches if you pay to join, not with the free membership. i dont have any extra money to be spending on that so i dont even know why i join them in the first place if the free membership wont let me actually talk to anyone.

This happens often to me.

Have you tried Plenty Of Fish?

Free site

I have similar problems, working for an agency where basically everyone else is married or in a serious relationship. I always try to shrink away when topics of relationships or sex/dating come up.

The past year, I've become more of an open book about it once I know somebody. I lay it all out for them without batting an eye:

-I don't really get past the first date with women.
-I'm kind of boring to go out with.
-I really do like time to myself (what I don't mention is the reason for this, being that I am -uncomfortable- and -awkward- in intimate situations)
-I rarely meet women because I don't break my routine

When they suggest I go out or seem surprised or anything of the sort, I just shrug apathetically. It kind of feels good to be so open about it. I've actually found that with this attitude they will genuinely try to offer advice instead of "Lol lets get laid", depending on the person.

It feels very strange right now to be saying that I'm 'going out' with somebody. It's strange to have other people know and ask about it, and ironically in the process of achieving this goal, I have dug up a WHOLE new source of anxiety. But that's a different thread.

BunnyNumber8 said:

I have a friend that's 25 and still a virgin and never been in a relationship either and she complains a lot about it....and has major self esteem issues which prevent her from taking necessry steps to actually go out and meet people

Click to expand...

sounds like a female version of me lol

To the OP and general conversation; yes, it is quite awkward/shameful when people just assume the norm. I remember talking with a couple friends at school last year about girls and dating, and my 28 year old friend chimed in with something along the lines of "It's not like we're virgins anymore, all unsure of ourselves around girls."

i'm like 'heh heh, quite right, quite right!' on the outside,

and ... on the inside.


frig.

suckaG said:

i'm like 'heh heh, quite right, quite right!' on the outside,

and ... on the inside.

Click to expand...

See, I can never seem to pull off a convincing facade, there. They always figured it out somehow lol.