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sentimentality

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Joined
Nov 9, 2010
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Location
Ann Arbor MI
Well, here I am. I’m glad I have found something like this where I can give and get support to/from other people. I feel like I have entered the darkest period of loneliness ever. I really want to succeed but it is really hard. I don’t have any friends that I can call up or hang out with on the weekends. I sleep every weekend, and watch TV every weekend. That’s all. I constantly think about what I want my life to be and how it can be and how it could have been. I can't take it.

Also there’s a guy, I have liked since freshman year. He’s a senior now and I guess that is really part of my sadness. I don’t understand why we can’t be together. I don’t understand why he’s afraid. We do nothing but stare at each other. Part of me is afraid too. But most of me does want let it all out. I tried to. Finally. I mean he already knew from his sophomore year that I liked him me telling him. Now it was coming from me not someone else. Almost 2 years later. I know its shame. My shyness. Has gotten in they way so many times and I’m ready to tell him I’m over all that. I think I just scared him away.




Another part of me is beginning to give up. It all seems impossible now. I wasted time. It hurts to look at him but it also makes me smile. I really should move on.
 
sentimentality said:
Well, here I am. I’m glad I have found something like this where I can give and get support to/from other people. I feel like I have entered the darkest period of loneliness ever. I really want to succeed but it is really hard. I don’t have any friends that I can call up or hang out with on the weekends. I sleep every weekend, and watch TV every weekend. That’s all. I constantly think about what I want my life to be and how it can be and how it could have been. I can't take it.

Also there’s a guy, I have liked since freshman year. He’s a senior now and I guess that is really part of my sadness. I don’t understand why we can’t be together. I don’t understand why he’s afraid. We do nothing but stare at each other. Part of me is afraid too. But most of me does want let it all out. I tried to. Finally. I mean he already knew from his sophomore year that I liked him me telling him. Now it was coming from me not someone else. Almost 2 years later. I know its shame. My shyness. Has gotten in they way so many times and I’m ready to tell him I’m over all that. I think I just scared him away.




Another part of me is beginning to give up. It all seems impossible now. I wasted time. It hurts to look at him but it also makes me smile. I really should move on.


Reading your post certainly brought back very familiar memories. I have been there. I spent my weekends alone. Never got invited to parties. Nothing. Do you suppose shyness is your worst enemy? If it is you should just confront this guy you like. You say you both just stare at each other? Could it be he has the same fears as you? I remember always saying to myself in high school, "Things will be better next year!" Things never got better. And the reason why is because I did nothing to make things better. You really just need to talk to this guy. Ask him out to the movies or something and see what he says. Even if he does reject you. So what. You know now. As you said, you think you need to move on anyway. This should do it. He will either accept you invitation or he won't. Believe me, either way you will not be any worse off than you are now.

By the way, I am not sure if the method by which I am replying to your post is correct. Forgive me is my reply winds up in a not so great spot in the forum.

Gino.
 
Welcome to the site
 
Hi,

I can relate to a lot of what you are saying. I find myself at a loss for what do do most weekends, and spend most of them alone and bored. I find it very tough also, and I just wish I wasn't so shy and could change things. I personally found just getting outside for an hour or two can make a difference, as it means you are not stuck in the one place all day.

Don't give up, even though it is tough. You can Pm me if you like, if there is anything I can do to help, even if it is just somebody to listen.
 

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