My Dad doesn't understand me.

Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum

Help Support Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.

Knyght

Member
Joined
Dec 21, 2010
Messages
11
Reaction score
0
Hi. For the sake of not being stalked I'll go by my username Knyght. But I will tell you that I'm 16. Considering the title of my thread some of you guys will probably think "Oh, she's just a teenager. Of course her Dad doesn't understand her." But I feel like I'm a really old teenager for just being 16.
Let me tell you about my family. I'm the baby of the house. My brother is just a year and two days older than me and I live with both my parents and a cat and some fish.
When people see my brother and I they call us the "perfect siblings" this is because we argue just about every day that we're by each other. I don't like to argue with him. I just hate him.(He's stupid and a gigalo. He's still a virgin, which surprises me considering he goes out with every ugly whore he can find.) The arguing drives my parents insane. Especially my Mom. She's a hard working woman who also cooks and cleans the house because my Dad won't do anything. This not only stresses my Mom out, considering she does just about any job she can find, but it stresses me out also because my Dad usually orders me to help her(which isn't necassary considering she orders me to help her, this is because she knows when she asks him for help he'll just order me) when he's just sitting on his ass watching TV. She usually wakes up at about 5 o clock in the morning either because of work or because of the cat. Then she cooks us breakfast and then heads off every Friday or other day to clean a rich lady's house.(She usually takes me with her to clean and usually makes me help her cook breakfast. Instead of a "Good Morning" I get a "Throw this out for me.") Then when she gets back she nags at my brother and I to clean. Which we usually don't do(6 years of listening to that, I got tired about after the second year, that's also the time I started counseling, I was 12) Dad never really hears this because he's at work. He works in construction so he also takes any job he can find. Currently he's working for the husband of the rich lady my Mom works for, I guess he uses this as an excuse for taking us along. Mom, already tired, does the best she can, even though she isn't getting paid. And I just try. Construction work is hard. And I realize that my Dad can't renovate a whole house by himself but I really just don't want to do anything. Yeah I know I sound pretty lazy. But that's the truth. Even when I see my own parents tired and working hard I don't even feel an iota of compassion to help them. In fact, I just feel sad(I don't know why I feel sad, I wish I would be angry or, weridly, even happy but nope I feel sad and it sucks because it ruins my entire day) and the only thought that goes through my mind is when I'll get out of there.
But onto my Dad.
My Dad thinks that just supporting us with money and gifts is loving us. But I really don't feel loved at all. I can say that I have so many more things than an only child with the same income because my parents work hard for that stuff. But I would trade it all away in a heartbeat if I could have their understanding. They don't know me at all. When I'm mad they yell at me and when I'm sad they give me things. And I hate it. I wish they would just talk to me and understand why. But I can't every talk to them because it would end in a beating. Yeah that's another problem. Now don't get all worked up over the "beatings" because it's not everyday anytime. It's once in a blue moon when I just don't shut up. Usually we'll be arguing about "how crazy I am" and then I'll try to explain something and my Dad will mock it and then I yell back and BAM. There goes the first strike. My parents don't know me because:
1. If they did know me truly they would seriously hate me. I'm not a bad kid but they don't like "my kind of thinking"
2. I don't talk to them because it usually ends up in arguments
3. I don't "talk" to them because it would end up in more beatings than I want.( One is too many, but I've had several spanning since my childhood until now, which isn't many considering it's 16 years but it doesn't change the fact that they physically suck and emotionally scar me)
Well that's as much as my family that I can put down in words that shouldn't drive you crazy from reading.(The rest I could make a book out of.) Anyways, because of my family I find myself wishing that I was crazy because maybe then I'll have an excuse for the loneliness of not being understood. It really sucks when you have no one in your family to turn to. To confide in. I actually used to have a counselor because I had severe depression. But 3 years I was dismissed because I was "cured" but I still am mildly depressed. Not as much as I was when I was, I would say "young", but it still sucks alot. Depression sucks. Severe depression blows. And thoughts about suicide kill.( Pun intended, trying to put a light on this situation)
It's pretty lonely being like this but I keep telling myself just 2 more years and I'll be long gone. And I know that there are people out there that have it worse than me. There are probably people reading this that are going "Get a grip of yourself you pansy. You don't have it bad." And to them I probably don't, but I'm not them. I don't know what if feels to have it worse than this and thank God I don't. I'd probably wouldn't even be writing this if I had it worse.(Because I would be dead. This is no joke. I was one phone call away from being on Suicide Watch when I was "young")
This is my life and to me it sucks. I try to find the light in the situation but when your lonely it's really hard to. I know there are people out there reading this that have gone through this same exact situation and I beg of you. Tell me how you got through this crap. Because I'm on the brink of overflowing again and sinking into that hell of depression I was in a few years back. (P.S. if you even suggest that I talk to my Dad let me tell you I HAVE TRIED OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN, I start a conversation and it ends in disaster, we have even had FAMILY COUNSELING SESSIONS but NOTHING WORKS. It's been years since the war between me and my Dad has started and I don't think it will end until I freaking blow my brains out. I need a new solution. Something that will actually work in this dysfunctional family of mine.)

If you made it to the end of this "autobiography" God bless your soul, you are a saint. And actually writing this for the entire internet to see makes me feel good. Like a the roads and the cities and the people on the world on my shoulders has been lifted off. It feels nice. It won't be the last you hear of me though. Sadly.
 
Knyght said:
But I feel like I'm a really old teenager for just being 16.

I'm not trying to be a dick, but most teenagers say this.

Knyght said:
My Dad thinks that just supporting us with money and gifts is loving us.

My dad is the same way. Not so much now that I'm an adult, but... try to understand it from your dad's point of view. Most likely your dad grew up having NOTHING, am I right? Maybe his family was poor, etc. Giving you the best things that he can buy could be the only way that he knows to show you love, because he's trying to give you what HE never had for himself.

That's how it was with my dad. Once I understood that, then I began to see his "gifts" and everything in a new light. I began to understand that there are several ways to love someone, and that this is one of them.

I think that in his own way, BOTH your mother and father love you and are working their asses off to support you and make sure you have a comfortable life.

Think about that for a while, and maybe try to talk to them with that in mind next time you're around them.

*shrug*

It's worth a shot.
 
Wow where to start. The one thing you don't know are what's going on in your parents lives. They could be loosing the house for all you know because of the economy but what I'm really saying is there's information you're not privy to. Families don't get highly dysfunctional without a crap load of skeletons in the closet that others are not "in the know about." I promise you that you are one of those people, if you had more information you could very well indeed understand why these things are happening. You asked how did others get through this? I did by realizing there were things that I was not aware of. They were: My mother had had breast cancer twice but us two were never told. My father had 3 affairs just while I was in high school alone but the parental units stayed together for myself and my brother. The first year I was out and gone (I'm the youngest just like you) they split forever. I could'nt believe my dad had a GF, he was always home the ******.

What can you do about it? Get involved with your future, spend lot's of time at school with a crap load of extra curricular activities. It will keep you away from home and you chose in which ones you like and participate in. That's what I did and it got me away from my family and I started to find some inner peace soon after. Get the grades and bounce off to college with or without their blessing. If you decide to work really hard you won't need them for a penny of your tuition but your 16 and now is the time to bust ass. There's no tomorrow for you academically so now's the time.

So my question to you is about the beatings. My drunken father fractured my skull, broke my nose twice and my cheek bone in the beatings I took form him. Are you really being beaten? Because if you are go straight to the principal of your school and lay it out for him. Believe me he will have your old mans ass in a sling quicker then you can say asshat. He can't beat you Knyght, he can't raise a hand to you it's illegal. If this indeed has happened call the cops and and sit down with someone at school, you do not have to be physically abused by anyone. Not him not anyone. Now if he's strapping you over his knee and whacking you with the belt? Well then come on you're 16 that's only going to be something you laugh about latter on in life about. He can't hurt you like that Knyght, he can just wound your pride. To me it sounds a whole lot different when you describe it as "beatings."

Lastly, you need to learn to be grateful for the good things in your life, for instance: There's no draft like there was in past years, you're not going to Iraq to make someone stock holder Occidental oil or Exon more compensatory profits. Friends, you have a few be grateful for them. Someday you may have none. My brother is dying right now, he's quite young but he's going to die from cancer and there's nothing anyone can do about it. I didn't get along with my brother like you do but now I would give anything just for him to live. All that parted us just doesn't ******* matter now, please try and wrap your head around this one because some day you will lose him. If you concentrate on the things you are grateful for instead of the honeysuckle it will get better almost immediately. They won't be perfict but they will be better then today was for you.

I hope to hear back from you and please hang around for a while, you will find friends here.
 
Hi Knyght, I'm 16 as well. I'm not going to tell you to "suck it up, princess" or anything like that.
You won't understand the pains of a hungry child in Africa or a sexually abused daughter, because you've never experienced what they did. So It doesn't help when someone tells you that "Someone has it worse than you, pansy!".

My mom's like your dad. I used to feel the same way like you did... I was really upset because we could never really communicate so we could never really understand each other. I realized that, that was the only way she knew how to show "care" and "concern". I won't deny that she's really overbearing and smothering, but she's the best I've got. At least until I'm older and financially capable enough to be independent. Perhaps your father and you have conflicting personalities, and so do not see things the same way.

Think about it. If you were going to be a parent in the future, what would you wish for your child? You could ask a friend that question as well, maybe ask someone who's about 10-20 years older than you. You might realise that your answers differ, which isn't a surprise really. It is a subjective question. You might want your child to pour their worries to you while your friend might not. Perhaps, as a boy your father's family didn't have the money for him to live a moderately comfortable life, so maybe that's what he wants to give you. Perhaps his family never talked about their emotions, so that is the 'norm' for him.

My parents weren't secretive about any "skeletons in the closet" and would put the blame on the kids, telling us we're the product of a mistake etc etc... but I've learnt that arguing with deluded people is pointless. Instead, I share my thoughts and ideas with a trusted friend. When my friend wasn't available (well the world doesn't revolve around me), I would pen my thoughts down in my journal while listening to some music. Those are some of my coping strategies.
Honestly, I'm not happy with my family either... but I know that when I'm grown up, this is the way I'll be relating to them as well. Supporting them, monetary-wise but don't expect any warm family-reunion dinners or crap like that.

 
hey knyght :D
my dad doesnt understands me either so you are not only one. well, have you tried writing a letter for your dad about how you feel? give him some space when you give it to him and let him come to you. hope this helps :)
 
I want to say to everyone who's posted so far, Thank you very much for reading my story and posting, so far I've gotten some really good advice and in truth when I think about my problems, even if I can't change them physically, I can get through them mentally.
To AncientBard
Your post really hit me hard. I appreciate you sharing your life with me and relating to how I feel. It's really helping me with my decisions in how I view my life. To answer your "beating" questions, No my Dad doesn't fracture my skull, but he doesn't drink or do drugs either so he is very aware of how hard he is hitting me. He isn't stupid enough to hurt me so much that I could have him arrested, but he doesn't lean me over his knee and spank me once. It's a midway point for the beatings not easy to take but it isn't unbearable.
And I personally want to thank you for sharing your story about your brother. I can't express how bad I feel for you. That's really hard to endure and I couldn't even imagine what I would do if my brother was dying. Your story just makes me want to appreciate what time I have with my brother, even if he is a really stupid guy.
To apathy
When you asked me to think about what I would do with my children, when I really thought about it, it wasn't really much a difference with what my parents did to me. Ironically. But thanks for making me ask myself that question. It helps me forgive my parents for being so overprotective.
To Callie
Thank you I'm going to like this website a lot.
To SherryGee
A letter filled with my feelings is a really daunting task for me currently but it sounds like a good idea. I might just try it sometime. Thanks for the idea.
To Badjedidude
Actually my parents are both from Mexico. Born and raised there. When they were growing up their parents beat them so bad. Lets just say that child abuse in America is not even discipline in Mexico. Not even close. I try to relate to how they were raised because I share that culture with them but it's so conflicting. Its really hard to because as an American I want their support their emotional love not just gifts. But in their culture a gift is almost seen as divine love. Because you don't get gifts just willy nilly. People are very poor there. For them to get gifts means sacrificing a huge part of their paycheck to give you something. I've tried very hard to see the things they give me as love but I'm so used to actually feeling love from my friends that when my parents give me the gifts I don't really feel loved. But I know I am, it's just hard not feeling it. Not getting hugs. Not getting kisses. Not being told I'm loved. For several years, it's really hard. But I know I'm loved. It's just very hard to see it.
 
Dear Knyght, my brother is a really stupid guy too. We had barley spoken in 2 years when he got sick. I'm also by racial and Hispanic as well, I was born in East Los Angeles. I can relate to what you are saying. The fact of the matter is somewhere in between is illegal, this is not Mexico and this is not 1990, things are different. We have learned what harms children and teens to the tune of 20 years since your dad was in his 20's. You don't have to have a single mark on you, just the fact that you posted this in this forum is enough documentation for law enforcement to prosecute him if he ever lays another hand on you EVER! Keep that in mind ok? He's lucky I don't live in your state, I would hand his ass to him, all 6'2" of me.
 
Knyght for some reason the style of your writing reminds me of my style at 14-16 years of age. o.o Hmm. Oddly I've been treated for depression as well.

Welcome to ALL. :)
 
Knyght, you may want to check out a book called Centuries of Childhood by Philippe Aries. The author provides evidence that our conception of childhood is unique to our society and that it did not exist in medieval European society or other non-Western European societies. My family for example immigrated from Greece in the 1960s and my mom often feels oppressed and full of angst that she never had a childhood. Instead she was immediately helping my grandma with housework and cooking as soon as she was able. I think this made my mom intensely unhappy and insecure even into her adult life, since she interprets herself through American standards as having lacked a true childhood. I feel I have picked up alot of my mom's frustration and unhappiness without any of the discipline she shows in committing to work and household chores.

As someone who was raised having a care-free childhood, I do not think it is a good practice. I have no discipline in life today, I am epicly lazy and a huge procrastinator, as I continued the set tone of an upbringing lacking discipline or even simple chores during my early years. Over time this has eaten at me as I sometimes dismay with how little I accomplished in life or during a given day. So my advice to you is that it is not always a bad thing that you don't have this fake notion of a childhood guiding your development like a more fully Americanized child.

A startling, obvious, but palpable conclusion is that most parents have no idea what they are doing. Rather than being capable, they are merely people who had sex and through planning or perhaps even indecision, they simply come into the situation of "having kids". This does not however, mean they know what they are doing, because they don't. Thus they just operate on the inertia from their guiding paradigm, instead of looking to raising kids as some art, a techne. Instead of trying to raise them to a higher standard that would escape the dominant pitfalls. Thus your parents raised you to have no childhood, but also no caring, instead picking up the false American habit of trying to bribe you into consumerist bliss.

 
Knyght,

I just started here today and read through your post.. I can relate in so many ways..
My dad beats me as well, Over the stupidest thing's to.. If i'm home 30 min's late he'll beat me 30 times :L
He yells all the time and if we dare even say anything to him.. well, let's not go there..
My dad was beaten when he was young so he believes he is doing the right thing. Besides, It's not the physical pain that hurts me, it's the emotional side to it all. He continuously tell's me over and over i will never amount to anything and that I will be a dead beat and have 4 kid's by the time i'm 20. Yeah, sure over here in Australia we do have the whole "You can't hit your kid's" law, but that still doesn't stop parent's from doing what they believe is the right thing to do, as it was how they were brought up. My dad is what some would call a monster in the way's he punishes/treats us. But that's only when he is angry (which is 90% of the day). When he is calm and happy, he will help us. My mum.. well she hopped, jumped and skipped out of my life when i was young, but not before trying to sell me off to a bunch of pedophile's online. She was the local bike, by that I mean EVERYONE has had a ride.. I don't speak to her at all but that is by my choice. My family is pretty stuffed up.
yes it sucks and people are always like you can report him and you won't hurt anymore..
But when it's the only person you have left in this world who you love.. You will put up with anything.. And I mean that..
There are people who may have it worse sure, but you have to learn to look after yourself as well. Try not to compare your problem's with someone else's :) Keep your head held high ;)
 
LuckieDuckie said:
Knyght,

I just started here today and read through your post.. I can relate in so many ways..
My dad beats me as well, Over the stupidest thing's to.. If i'm home 30 min's late he'll beat me 30 times :L
He yells all the time and if we dare even say anything to him.. well, let's not go there..
My dad was beaten when he was young so he believes he is doing the right thing. Besides, It's not the physical pain that hurts me, it's the emotional side to it all. He continuously tell's me over and over i will never amount to anything and that I will be a dead beat and have 4 kid's by the time i'm 20. Yeah, sure over here in Australia we do have the whole "You can't hit your kid's" law, but that still doesn't stop parent's from doing what they believe is the right thing to do, as it was how they were brought up. My dad is what some would call a monster in the way's he punishes/treats us. But that's only when he is angry (which is 90% of the day). When he is calm and happy, he will help us. My mum.. well she hopped, jumped and skipped out of my life when i was young, but not before trying to sell me off to a bunch of pedophile's online. She was the local bike, by that I mean EVERYONE has had a ride.. I don't speak to her at all but that is by my choice. My family is pretty stuffed up.
yes it sucks and people are always like you can report him and you won't hurt anymore..
But when it's the only person you have left in this world who you love.. You will put up with anything.. And I mean that..
There are people who may have it worse sure, but you have to learn to look after yourself as well. Try not to compare your problem's with someone else's :) Keep your head held high ;)

Ugh.

reading this was seriously painful.
my folks didn't try to sell me off to anyone (i won't say "GOD what kind of people do that" since... i suppose i already know the answer to that.)
but i do know how some of the things you mentioned feel.

i am so sorry you are going through this.

what can i tell you. you're brave, and strong. and i hope you will make a better fate for yourself.
i'm here if you want to talk.

and... get out of there. as soon as you can. no-one deserves these things. (hug)

 
dead said:
LuckieDuckie said:
Knyght,

I just started here today and read through your post.. I can relate in so many ways..
My dad beats me as well, Over the stupidest thing's to.. If i'm home 30 min's late he'll beat me 30 times :L
He yells all the time and if we dare even say anything to him.. well, let's not go there..
My dad was beaten when he was young so he believes he is doing the right thing. Besides, It's not the physical pain that hurts me, it's the emotional side to it all. He continuously tell's me over and over i will never amount to anything and that I will be a dead beat and have 4 kid's by the time i'm 20. Yeah, sure over here in Australia we do have the whole "You can't hit your kid's" law, but that still doesn't stop parent's from doing what they believe is the right thing to do, as it was how they were brought up. My dad is what some would call a monster in the way's he punishes/treats us. But that's only when he is angry (which is 90% of the day). When he is calm and happy, he will help us. My mum.. well she hopped, jumped and skipped out of my life when i was young, but not before trying to sell me off to a bunch of pedophile's online. She was the local bike, by that I mean EVERYONE has had a ride.. I don't speak to her at all but that is by my choice. My family is pretty stuffed up.
yes it sucks and people are always like you can report him and you won't hurt anymore..
But when it's the only person you have left in this world who you love.. You will put up with anything.. And I mean that..
There are people who may have it worse sure, but you have to learn to look after yourself as well. Try not to compare your problem's with someone else's :) Keep your head held high ;)

Ugh.

reading this was seriously painful.
my folks didn't try to sell me off to anyone (i won't say "GOD what kind of people do that" since... i suppose i already know the answer to that.)
but i do know how some of the things you mentioned feel.

i am so sorry you are going through this.

what can i tell you. you're brave, and strong. and i hope you will make a better fate for yourself.
i'm here if you want to talk.

and... get out of there. as soon as you can. no-one deserves these things. (hug)

Yeah my mum is a severely delusional person but what can I say? ahh well I was told that showing my emotion's in real life is weak, crying is weak, and whatnot.. so i bottle it up..
yes at times I do feel like really lonely.. but yeah.. I would say how great it is to have someone that finally understand's me but i'm not sure I should say it or feel a bit sad that you know the feeling :L ...
I could do with a hug :) .. Santa forgot to visit me again this year... it's sad seeing the neighbour's ride around on there flashy new bikes or some even with new cars and your just stuck inside with your dad going on about how stupid you are for thinking that christmas would be different this time around.. *sigh*
 
hi Duckie! I hope you stick around. We're nice bunch, we promise. *hug*

Also, you don't have to bottle up your emotions here. ^_^
 
LuckieDuckie said:
dead said:
LuckieDuckie said:
Knyght,

I just started here today and read through your post.. I can relate in so many ways..
My dad beats me as well, Over the stupidest thing's to.. If i'm home 30 min's late he'll beat me 30 times :L
He yells all the time and if we dare even say anything to him.. well, let's not go there..
My dad was beaten when he was young so he believes he is doing the right thing. Besides, It's not the physical pain that hurts me, it's the emotional side to it all. He continuously tell's me over and over i will never amount to anything and that I will be a dead beat and have 4 kid's by the time i'm 20. Yeah, sure over here in Australia we do have the whole "You can't hit your kid's" law, but that still doesn't stop parent's from doing what they believe is the right thing to do, as it was how they were brought up. My dad is what some would call a monster in the way's he punishes/treats us. But that's only when he is angry (which is 90% of the day). When he is calm and happy, he will help us. My mum.. well she hopped, jumped and skipped out of my life when i was young, but not before trying to sell me off to a bunch of pedophile's online. She was the local bike, by that I mean EVERYONE has had a ride.. I don't speak to her at all but that is by my choice. My family is pretty stuffed up.
yes it sucks and people are always like you can report him and you won't hurt anymore..
But when it's the only person you have left in this world who you love.. You will put up with anything.. And I mean that..
There are people who may have it worse sure, but you have to learn to look after yourself as well. Try not to compare your problem's with someone else's :) Keep your head held high ;)

Ugh.

reading this was seriously painful.
my folks didn't try to sell me off to anyone (i won't say "GOD what kind of people do that" since... i suppose i already know the answer to that.)
but i do know how some of the things you mentioned feel.

i am so sorry you are going through this.

what can i tell you. you're brave, and strong. and i hope you will make a better fate for yourself.
i'm here if you want to talk.

and... get out of there. as soon as you can. no-one deserves these things. (hug)

Yeah my mum is a severely delusional person but what can I say? ahh well I was told that showing my emotion's in real life is weak, crying is weak, and whatnot.. so i bottle it up..
yes at times I do feel like really lonely.. but yeah.. I would say how great it is to have someone that finally understand's me but i'm not sure I should say it or feel a bit sad that you know the feeling :L ...
I could do with a hug :) .. Santa forgot to visit me again this year... it's sad seeing the neighbour's ride around on there flashy new bikes or some even with new cars and your just stuck inside with your dad going on about how stupid you are for thinking that christmas would be different this time around.. *sigh*


i suppose sometimes it's easier to tell that to people, than to have to deal with causing them pain, or taking the time to actually listen. i don't know.

as SophiaGrace said, you don't have to bottle things up here. feel free to talk.

and...

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs!))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
(if you don't mind hugging creepy zombies, that is :p)

 
Luckie Duckie, if you give me your email address I'll send you an E-Christmas Card. :)
 
SophiaGrace said:
hi Duckie! I hope you stick around. We're nice bunch, we promise. *hug*

Also, you don't have to bottle up your emotions here. ^_^

I can see now :) I'll try to learn not to bottle them up ^^ Looking forward to getting to know you :)

dead said:
LuckieDuckie said:
dead said:
LuckieDuckie said:
Knyght,

I just started here today and read through your post.. I can relate in so many ways..
My dad beats me as well, Over the stupidest thing's to.. If i'm home 30 min's late he'll beat me 30 times :L
He yells all the time and if we dare even say anything to him.. well, let's not go there..
My dad was beaten when he was young so he believes he is doing the right thing. Besides, It's not the physical pain that hurts me, it's the emotional side to it all. He continuously tell's me over and over i will never amount to anything and that I will be a dead beat and have 4 kid's by the time i'm 20. Yeah, sure over here in Australia we do have the whole "You can't hit your kid's" law, but that still doesn't stop parent's from doing what they believe is the right thing to do, as it was how they were brought up. My dad is what some would call a monster in the way's he punishes/treats us. But that's only when he is angry (which is 90% of the day). When he is calm and happy, he will help us. My mum.. well she hopped, jumped and skipped out of my life when i was young, but not before trying to sell me off to a bunch of pedophile's online. She was the local bike, by that I mean EVERYONE has had a ride.. I don't speak to her at all but that is by my choice. My family is pretty stuffed up.
yes it sucks and people are always like you can report him and you won't hurt anymore..
But when it's the only person you have left in this world who you love.. You will put up with anything.. And I mean that..
There are people who may have it worse sure, but you have to learn to look after yourself as well. Try not to compare your problem's with someone else's :) Keep your head held high ;)

Ugh.

reading this was seriously painful.
my folks didn't try to sell me off to anyone (i won't say "GOD what kind of people do that" since... i suppose i already know the answer to that.)
but i do know how some of the things you mentioned feel.

i am so sorry you are going through this.

what can i tell you. you're brave, and strong. and i hope you will make a better fate for yourself.
i'm here if you want to talk.

and... get out of there. as soon as you can. no-one deserves these things. (hug)

Yeah my mum is a severely delusional person but what can I say? ahh well I was told that showing my emotion's in real life is weak, crying is weak, and whatnot.. so i bottle it up..
yes at times I do feel like really lonely.. but yeah.. I would say how great it is to have someone that finally understand's me but i'm not sure I should say it or feel a bit sad that you know the feeling :L ...
I could do with a hug :) .. Santa forgot to visit me again this year... it's sad seeing the neighbour's ride around on there flashy new bikes or some even with new cars and your just stuck inside with your dad going on about how stupid you are for thinking that christmas would be different this time around.. *sigh*


i suppose sometimes it's easier to tell that to people, than to have to deal with causing them pain, or taking the time to actually listen. i don't know.

as SophiaGrace said, you don't have to bottle things up here. feel free to talk.

and...

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs!))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
(if you don't mind hugging creepy zombies, that is :p)

Aww :) Hugging creepy zombies sounds.. fun :L lol..
Yeah well its kinda hard and all cause ive bottled them up for so many years
 

Latest posts

Back
Top