do u ever get over a broken heart?

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jlozdude

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hi everyone.
me and my long distance gf ended things almost 2 years ago now and i still cry for her everyday. i know it probably just sounds pathetic but its true!
she lives in the uk and im in australia. tho we would each take a holiday once a year to each others countries. i know it sounds stupid but honestly we didnt feel far apart at all. she ended things, not me. she has a daughter and wanted to try and work things out with her father just for her daughters sake. i can understand that totally and tho she said shes trying to get back with him for her sake she still txts me everyday saying she loves me. i totally adore her i dont really care what anyone says cos i know im my heart what she really means to me.
the thought of me being with anyone else brings tears to my eyes cos i know how much im already in love. does true love ever come back or do u ever really get over it? its been 2 years and im still as upset now as i was back then.
 
I wasn't as close to my distance girlfriend as you were to yours, and it took me 3 years to stop being miserable. I still occasionally have dreams about her, and feel regrets. I think these things never really fade away. We just integrate them as part of our make-up...they become a part of our personal saga of torment and victory, our testament to having lived. A warrior has scars. A mountain biker, mud all over himself. We have.... this. It never truly goes away. Pain fades to a dull regret, and regret fades to...nothing. But it's almost a scary nothing, because you'll realize that all you had left was the hurt to remember with, and now you don't even feel that.

You have to forcibly distract yourself. Make yourself pursue other women, even if it's just cold-approaching someone. Make yourself try new things. Go skydiving or go hunt for meteorites or something. But do something to get yourself out of your routine, and you'll hopefully manage a handhold to climb out of your misery. Most importantly, as you do these things...try not to imagine doing them with her.
 
Brian said:
I wasn't as close to my distance girlfriend as you were to yours, and it took me 3 years to stop being miserable. I still occasionally have dreams about her, and feel regrets. I think these things never really fade away. We just integrate them as part of our make-up...they become a part of our personal saga of torment and victory, our testament to having lived. A warrior has scars. A mountain biker, mud all over himself. Everyone else has.... this.

You have to forcibly distract yourself. Make yourself pursue other women, even if it's just cold-approaching someone. Make yourself try new things. Go skydiving or go hunt for meteorites or something. But do something to get yourself out of your routine, and you'll hopefully manage a handhold to climb out of your misery.

hi thanks for yr reply. i try to do stuff and some days its not bad but other days its just hopless. we were together seriously for 6 full years. the thought of loving someone else is hard for me to accept because im already so in love. just cant really see past the feelings i have. she made my world turn and still does. i cant turn these feelings off does that mean something?
 
Yes! You can, and you will, get over a broken heart! I've recovered from 13 of them!

Your personal attentions, memories and general daily focus must, though, be removed from thoughts about her. That sounds like a really painful emotional surgical procedure, but it's a fundamental truth.

A broken heart is a kettle that refuses to stop boiling for as long as it's being watched.
 
Yeah,you do. At least I know I did,but I prefer not to even touch the matter
 
Getting over any tragic event takes time. An example:

I broke up with my husband almost 7 years ago, and then he passed away 2 1/2 years ago.

As time goes on, I don't think of him as much as I used to and hardly cry at all.

I dated for a while, and had a lot of fun, but just haven't found any man that I am attracted to physically and emotionally.

Time does, indeed heal all wounds, and everyone heals at a different rate of time. Hang in there, I believe it will get better!
 
I agree, wounds are healed after some time. Sure you still think about them, but it gets less and less after a while.
 
I'm going to say yes and no. In time I believe you learn to deal with the heartbreak and move on from it, but if this person really meant a lot to you, you really never get over them. There's always a place in your heart that will belong to them. It gets better over time, eventually you find someone new who replaces that heartbreak or helps make it not hurt so much.
 
Nothing's as hard as recovering from a former relationship to which you didn't choose to put an end...
I had myself a quite hard relationship a few years ago and it took very long before I was able to forget about it.
Like every time I acted with the best fashions to cause the end of that relationship... When I reminisce about all the things I did, I just want to laugh!
At first I couldn't figure out why the hell she wanted to dump me?? It got me thinking so much, my self-confidence took a real heavy hit, to the point that I would even contemplate suicide when faced with me being single again... and therefore alone (??).
Nah... Thanks God for not having attempted suicide! It would've been the silliest thing I would ever have done in that whole silly life of mine.
When you take a step back to look at the overall picture you start to realize ****! that slut almost killed me!
Actually she wasn't a slut but things get so mixed up in your head that you have to accuse people around to stop feeling guilty...
She was my babe, my sweetheart, my... etc. now I see her just like any other women on earth.
You'll see dude, every thing on earth is doomed to fade away, even feelings! ;) take a honeysuckle, everything's gonna be alright.
 
Nothing's as hard as recovering from a former relationship to which you didn't choose to put an end...
I had myself a quite hard relationship a few years ago and it took very long before I was able to forget about it.
Like every time I acted with the best fashions to cause the end of that relationship... When I reminisce about all the things I did, I just want to laugh!
At first I couldn't figure out why the hell she wanted to dump me?? It got me thinking so much, my self-confidence took a real heavy hit, to the point that I would even contemplate suicide when faced with me being single again... and therefore alone (??).
Nah... Thanks God for not having attempted suicide! It would've been the silliest thing I would ever have done in that whole silly life of mine.
When you take a step back to look at the overall picture you start to realize ****! that slut almost killed me!
Actually she wasn't a slut but things get so mixed up in your head that you have to accuse people around to stop feeling guilty...
She was my babe, my sweetheart, my... etc. now I see her just like any other women on earth.
You'll see dude, every thing on earth is doomed to fade away, even feelings! take a honeysuckle, everything's gonna be alright.

amen

great advice

*hugs jlolzdude*

time and something to distract yourself is your best bet for healing,

it'll be hard, and you'll probably still think about it form time to time, but less and less, and the pain will start to dull over time,

you've still and you'll always have a chance at another love,

it's not over man,

we're all in this together and I'm pulling for you

:)
 
jlozdude,

i'm really sorry to hear your story. i've been there, i'll tell you that much.

well it's definitely possible to get over a broken heart. the hard thing is forgetting about her. even if you get over her and you're feelings for her vanish, she will always live on in your memory. there will always be something to remind you of her. i know that this is going to sound like TERRIBLE advice, but if you really want to mend your heart, then you have to move on. something has to give way. you don't want to spend all your years suffering over someone. move on and find someone else, and if she comes back for you, well, that's a dilemma you can ponder for when that happens. best of luck.
 

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