I am scared. I am new. I am alone.

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RavenRose

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Hello all! I am very new at this and am very scared, but at least I am making an effort at last! I have been agoraphobic for nearly 3 years now and want to get over it but don't know how. Has anyone else got any ideas? Any suggestions welcome!

Also, I am looking forward to speaking to you all! Thanks for reading.
 
Hi Ravenrose!
Welcome to the forums! Good to hear u are making an effort to overcome ur phobia. Dont have any suggestions really, have u tried therapy?
 
Hello. My agoraphobia has got in the way of so many things in my life and I suppose there have always been clues since I was a child.
Social phobia has contributed A LOT! Never been good talking with people at all.

Therapy seems a long way off yet - it costs money I don't have. I can't even go out the front door, going further is out of the question for now.

 
Dutch courage. Get drunk occasionally and go out. After a while perhaps you'll be confident enough to do it when you're sober. Some people are gonna think that's really bad advice, but a drink always helps me do things I would normally struggle with.
 
I like getting drunk but hate the motion sickness it gives me. I'l end up puking everywhere I go!
 
Hey welcome :). I know social phobia sucks, but don't have experience with agoraphobia. Maybe start small? Just sit in the doorway with it open for a few minutes at first, then when you feel ready, move to the stoop.
 
Welcome to the site.
 
RavenRose said:
Hello all! I am very new at this and am very scared, but at least I am making an effort at last! I have been agoraphobic for nearly 3 years now and want to get over it but don't know how. Has anyone else got any ideas? Any suggestions welcome! Also, I am looking forward to speaking to you all! Thanks for reading.

Look at: The Linden Method. LGH:)
 
Hi and welcome. Glad you are now opening up as I think that is always the first step in over coming issues about ourselves. :)
 
Minus said:
Welcome to the site.

It is all about breathing. Power is energy/time , and in our body energy comes out of food and oxygen. There are three kind of breathing, shallow,diaphragmatic and intercostal. How do U breath?:rolleyes2:
 
floffyschneeman said:
Hi and welcome. Glad you are now opening up as I think that is always the first step in over coming issues about ourselves. :)

That's very true but there are times when I think that there is no point in even trying. It can be hard to find the motivation when I remember all the things that happened to me before, nothing good ever came to me so I eventually stopped going out. Now I'm too frightened.
 
Hey, Rose, welcome to the site. Can't say much since I don't have personal, firsthand experience with agoraphobia or know anybody who does, but I guess the way to go would be by talking to a licensed psychologist, if any live in the area. And of course, there's the question if they're any good at all...But if you have friends of family, you might consider asking them to drive you to the office, be there for emotional support if and when fear strikes, and possibly chip in on the bill, if they know you're good for the money down the road. :)

Sadly, not all of us got a close friend or family to rely on, and then it comes down to the person himself to find some manner of courage and determination within him- or herself to do what must be done, even if you got to do it with gritted teeth. You got to repeat to yourself that the possible positive outcome outweights the likely negative outcome of inaction.

Eh. Hopefully, I've been of some use. If you'd like to talk to someone, anyway, about anything at all (sans religion and politics), I'm always up for a talk with new folks. So, PM me if you're looking for someone to talk to. Might not be as effective and productive as talking to a shrink, but hey, at least I don't charge anything. I enjoy talking to new people. :D
 
RavenRose,

Welcome to the forum. After some time, I hope you begin to get comfortable with all of us.

Regarding your agoraphobia, you have found someone to relate to it and empathize with you.

I was agoraphobic for many years. The longest I didn't leave my home was a total of 8 months.

I don't know if you have ever heard of cognitive therapy. Being agoraphobic I know it is impossible for you to get out to see a therapist right now. In my experience, I read a book someone gave me. My experience with cognitive therapy is this. First, it takes a lot of courage, pushing yourself, and someone you trust that has the time to help you. I started out by clinging to the person, and just going outside on the porch or in front of the house. It was terrifying for me, but I had to force myself because I was sick at missing out on everything. My helper was my Mom, because my husband worked a lot of hours. After doing this for a while, we walked about three houses down and then turned around and came back. After a very long time, I was able to do more things. Eventually, my Mom would stand all the way at the end of the street I lived on, and I was able to walk alone to her.

Now, I still have mild agoraphobia. I go out, but it has to be with someone. I no longer need just my Mom to help.

However, I was able to get to a therapist and a psychiatrist to help me. The medication and help of the therapy changed my life.

I am sorry if none of this helps you. I know I have seen on TV, on shows like Oprah (sp?) unfortunate agoraphobics that are never able to leave their house. I hope you are not one of them.

Anyway, it takes a lot of bravery, and the will to not want to be housebound forever...PM me if you feel that I can be of any help to you.
 
RavenRose said:
Hello all! I am very new at this and am very scared, but at least I am making an effort at last! I have been agoraphobic for nearly 3 years now and want to get over it but don't know how. Has anyone else got any ideas? Any suggestions welcome!

Also, I am looking forward to speaking to you all! Thanks for reading.

Welcome! One thing that has helped me with my social phobia is this sort of mindset: imagine the vastness of the cosmos, and worlds innumerable, and how life on earth is virtually a mote of sand in a desert, and think to yourself, who are these people to me? Why should I be afraid of them?
 
RavenRose said:
floffyschneeman said:
Hi and welcome. Glad you are now opening up as I think that is always the first step in over coming issues about ourselves. :)

That's very true but there are times when I think that there is no point in even trying. It can be hard to find the motivation when I remember all the things that happened to me before, nothing good ever came to me so I eventually stopped going out. Now I'm too frightened.


Welcome! I know it's difficult to stop thinking about the past and all the bad experiences it brings with it, but letting go and opening up to the future... well, it helps alot :)

Afterall, you're never to old for a new adventure.
 
Hi-
Nice to meet you, you've found a great forum! Tell us more about yourself besides agoraphobia. :)
What music to you listen to? Do you have any pets?
Welcome!

Teresa
 
SofiasMami said:
Hi-
Nice to meet you, you've found a great forum! Tell us more about yourself besides agoraphobia. :)
What music to you listen to? Do you have any pets?
Welcome!

Teresa

Sorry, guess I should have done this sooner, this is my first time using a forum!

I am quite a boring person to be honest but I can list some things about myself for anyone who's interested:

Music - pretty much just metal and the thousand sub-genres that go with it! I like the diversity although it can be hard to listen to and a bit repetitive sometimes.

Pets - 3 black cats. They are great:).

Other - Formula 1; Photography; Stephen King books; Good old Star Trek (they're the best); Animals and Insects, and Curry!

Is that enough? Who else likes these things? If anyone shares some of these interests and want to talk more about them then you can PM me anytime:). What diverse things do other people like?
 

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