Hardest thing ever

Folks,

This is my first post on this forum. So hello everyone!

I'm 27 years old, I have two degrees, am fluent in a language that is very different from my native tongue and I work in a country other than the one that I was born in. In spite of my background I haven't had a girlfriend once. I'm sure it's not because of my appearance, I'm quite a fit guy and some of my female friends say that I look "too good".

I feel like I'm getting older and every year it just gets more and more difficult to find someone. I don't even know how to go out and meet people. It seems like it's easier to get a book published or maybe even win the Nobel prize than it is to find a partner. Is there anything that I can do?

lol it seems as though its easier to get a book published or even win a noble prize than it is to find a partner...lol well said. It is hard (in my world) as well...the hardest thing ever, the only thing you can do is keep trying though, and try to enjoy life as much as possible while doing so...

Hi 99 leagues and welcome to the forum.

hiya 99 glad 2 c u here. it sounds like ur in the right place

I agree with jales. Just enjoy your life to the fullest and then people will see that you're a very approachable person and start talking to you. Women love confidence and knowing you can have a good time without having a woman by your side. Sounds strange but 95% of the time it's true, unless they're really weird. Not a good weird but a bad weird, if that makes sense.

Well, if you're physically attractive that's a good start. Scientists have proven that good looks is what gets people's interest first and foremost. Even if you're just acceptable it helps.

Unfortunately, I really have no idea how anyone meets anyone they go out with, so my only guess is perhaps a website like eHarmony (bleh) or just talk to random girls you think you might like and try to get their number or AIM. I wish I could help (^_^; )

BTW, welcome!

Hey 99,

You are lucky to be fit and attractive. Even so, that is not what brings a partner. Unfit and ugly people can have lovers and partners too!

What you need is to TRY. And be open. And be brave. And try to find someone who shares your interests, values and beliefs. You can search a spiritual or religious place near where you live, or a club or activity group that shares your interests. You WILL find someone! When you are ready! When the student is ready, the master appears!

Hey 99Leagues, it looks like we are in the same league here (haha)

I'm also a good looking guy (people say I look like Tony Hawk)...just I have a very very hard time talking to women. The good looking ones are very difficult to even get a word in and even those that are average or even less either have a boyfriend already or just don't give me the time of day. The only girls I have ever dated had very low self esteem.

What country do you live in?

SNOW... I have the exact same problem!

Folks,

Thanks for your comments, they're all very encouraging! Part of the problem I think is that I'm normally not open to relationships. It's more a matter of the way I live my life, which is just working and studying. And it's very rare to meet women with the same interests in libraries and classrooms! (even if we're interested in the same field)

Snow: to answer your question, I live in Japan. This is advice from a bitter man, but I just say anything to women. It doesn't really matter I just sort of start rambling and making jokes and eventually a conversation just happens. I actually pun a bit heavily, it works sometimes but most of the time the jokes go right over most sane people's heads. But you might want to try it!