Places to meet the opposite sex?

Where do you go?

A lot of people are single, but all the places you get told to try, the people there often just do their thing and go. like at a gym or etc.

It takes me time to get to know people, I'm quite shy at first.

English Literature classes.

There was one guy in those classes when I was that major, in a class full of girls.

Go for it!

ANYWHERE.

Seriously.

Anywhere. It's just up to your attitude and the way you view life, really. There's no special magic phrase, there are no routines or one-liners.... it's just how you face life and carry yourself. Be confident and enjoy yourself WHEREVER you are and you'll find that women will be taking an interest no matter where you go.

I also would not recommend the typical places like bars, clubs, parties, hangouts, etc. That's just my opinion.

Restaurants, laundromats, gas stations, grocery stores! (ftw)

BJD can you define what confidence is? I'd like to hear what your definition of it is.

For me it means to pretty much ignore your second-thoughts about what everyone around you thinks of you. Just get out there and do your own thing.... don't worry about what others think of you or what they see when they look at you. Be who you are and don't apologize for it. Have no shame or embarrassment.

It means to be strong inside yourself. Hold your head high, because if you think you're pretty decent then others will as well. People pick up on self-loathing SO EASILY... but if you're OK with yourself, then they'll pick up on that and want to be around you more; after all, you must be doing SOMETHING right, correct?

The thing is... this can't be faked.

Lots of people try to weave a mask of illusion over their insecurities by acting tough or like a *********, incorrectly assuming that this makes them somehow confident... but it doesn't. It's just a mask that degrades their self-opinion further because they have to hide behind these things. To make matters worse, many women also mistake douchebaggery for confidence, not knowing that the ******* men that they're so attracted to aren't confident at all; they're scared little hurting boys fearfully employing tough-man acts in order to fake confidence.

Confidence is a sense of accepting your fate and situation as a human being and as a member of society. Sure, there could be room for improvement in your life, perhaps... and that's OK. Part of being a good human is continually striving to better yourself. But confidence is enjoying the NOW and WHO you are. If you like yourself (not arrogance, btw) and are alright with your life, comfortable with showing others who you are and how you feel...

That's confidence.

That was AWESOME bjd. So glad I asked you to define that.

I think for us men (& especially shyer men) we often fail to realise that women are waiting for us to talk to them..!

For E.G. after my yoga class tonight, as I was getting my shoes on there was woman doing the same next to me, now once when I was younger I would have been too shy to speak to her & I probably came off to everyone as quite standoffish. (but I was just shyer then)
Tonight I just went "blah blah oh that was a good yoga session"
And then we had a little chat, now from that I can build and maybe get to know her?

Socially the onus is ALWAYS on men to approach and it can be Very awkward sometimes, but if you don't do it there aint nobody gonna do it for you!

Anyway that's my realisation for this night.!

---

@ Badjedidude

Well said!

funkymonkey said:

Where do you go?

A lot of people are single, but all the places you get told to try, the people there often just do their thing and go. like at a gym or etc.

It takes me time to get to know people, I'm quite shy at first.

Click to expand...

As already mentioned, best place is everywhere!
But if you are not having so good communication skills try online adult dating or at least read something about catching female attention in any situation. If you ask me it is very simple: they want same as we, so usually you need just "something" to make first step and start conversation. Sometimes women will give you great "intro", sometimes she will just stand there waiting for you. Best is to practice, after first few times you will see that is not hard at all to start conversation and 15 minutes later ask for number.

I was perplexed a few years back, not knowing where to meet men, or any type of potential friend to boot. I went back to school, didn't really click with anyone there. The gym, well, I was too shy to talk to anyone. Grocery stores, out anywhere...just didn't work for me. I did the internet dating thing and it was successful for me.

Anywhere except bars, clubs etc women in those places are inundated and also cynical, better to strike up conversations in random places like the street or shops etc

Delta said:

Anywhere except bars, clubs etc women in those places are inundated and also cynical, better to strike up conversations in random places like the street or shops etc

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Actually, this is very good advice because it is true. Women in clubs are on some kind prepared for many males that will approach them and that is probably reason why they refuse most of them, on the other side on street, club, grocery, wherever, they are just not prepared, they are more spontaneous and that is a reason why is better to approach them everywhere except nightlife places.

Badjedidude said:

ANYWHERE.

Seriously.

Anywhere. It's just up to your attitude and the way you view life, really. There's no special magic phrase, there are no routines or one-liners.... it's just how you face life and carry yourself. Be confident and enjoy yourself WHEREVER you are and you'll find that women will be taking an interest no matter where you go.

Click to expand...

exactly !

BJD is like Beetlejuice. You say his name three times and he'll appear....do we really want that? :club:


Lol, j/k, love you, BJD

The real question is "Places to meet not-awful examples of the opposite sex"
We may never know.

TheRealCallie said:

BJD is like Beetlejuice.  You say his name three times and he'll appear....do we really want that?  :club:


Lol, j/k, love you, BJD

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MY GOD. 

BADJEDIDUDE. BADJEDIDUDE. BADJEDIDUDE. 

#waitingendlessly. 

My god I miss him.

Well, if this thread has been bumped, let me put my spin on this topic.

You should never go to something/somewhere with the intention of meeting the opposite sex. You might not know this, but you're subconsciously telegraphing desperation. And it WILL repel people rather than attract them.

Go about your daily business, and seriously try not to care about meeting the opposite sex. I can't tell you how to simply not care, because I honestly don't know. Infact, I don't think anyone really does.

Red_Wedding_Casualty said:

Well, if this thread has been bumped, let me put my spin on this topic.

You should never go to something/somewhere with the intention of meeting the opposite sex. You might not know this, but you're subconsciously telegraphing desperation. And it WILL repel people rather than attract them.

Go about your daily business, and seriously try not to care about meeting the opposite sex. I can't tell you how to simply not care, because I honestly don't know. Infact, I don't think anyone really does.

Click to expand...

You know, to me - it translates to, do things you enjoy. and meet people who do too.

I don't meet people lol.
I used to do the bar scene. Sadly, too many *******. Also I'm starting to feel like an old man running after children every time I go into a bar, was I always that age, or did somehow every girl on the planet start looking SO YOUNG?!? LOL!

SO except work and the occasional restaurant, I don't really meet people. Although I love to accost people on the street and start chatting, it's hard to do that in a big city like mine without people automatically assuming you're a serial killer.
But really, anything works. I find kindered spirits when going to the library, or shopping, or anywhere really. Just talk. I find jokes are great ice breakers.

I wish I knew, I'm having a very hard time meeting anyone. People just don't approach you like they used to according to other people's experience. Only dating is just as stressful. People are often times after one thing.