I'm here for the same reason you are

... And I guess we all know (far, far too well) what that is.

I have friends and I have family*, but I've never felt close to any of them. I have no one I can talk to. I have no one I can trust. My mind brings me to some very dark places and I feel like I'd only scare people [away] if I were to share them. I've always felt wrong. I've never felt like I've belonged anywhere. The only conclusion I've ever been able to reach is that I'm the problem.

So, why am I here? Why are we here? For company, for help, for reassurance that we're never the only ones...

* I've lived with my aunt and cousins since I was 12. My only immediate family is my brother but he's a sociopath and we're not really on speaking terms.

And sorry if I'm coming across sounding all depressed, I'm up and down a lot but I'm not usually this bad.

You're not the only one. Just so you know.

To add to what I'm Fine said...by far not the only one. Sometimes it's hard to open up and trust people, like you said, afraid you'll scare them off, or just having to trust someone in general. You're safe here though, share what you want to share.

G'day

welcome

Welcome to the forum!

I hope you can find some good company here, for in those lonely hours.